I've been watching the HBO series 'Big Love', and it is surprisingly OMG TRIGGERS. It's like a refresher course in all the things that make poly stuff not work
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Wow, that sounds awful. That may be the worst experience of poly anyone I know personally has had. If you do create a filter, I'd love to be included - I like peeking in on people's relationship stories. :)
Yeah, I was too young and dumb to realize it was Bad Poly and not the correctly executed Good Poly. I just figured, I like sharing, so it's not a problem if four or five other girls get to share my boyfriend. The women in the family really tried, though. I'm sympathizing a lot with the women in 'Big Love', because it's really hard to communicate with each other when it comes to personal things like sex and chores.
It wasn't all bad, though, just most of it. If I make a filter, I'll put you in it:)
Yeah, most of the poly mistakes my friends fall into tend to be of the "this poly is really just serial monogamy with overlap" type, or the "actually I just want to sleep with whoever I want" type. Your story is a new and impressive type. :)
And I am at least as interested in hearing about how the women tried to make it work as I am in hearing about how the man screwed it up. ;)
Ugh. There will be much more ranting about the man. I despise him and wish him dead. There is a girl on my FriendsList who was in a later relationship with him, and she'd pretty much not piss on him if he were on fire. I've reached the bitter stage, but she's still livid with rage.
Out of curiousity, how many poly people have you known? In my little section of California, there's not many of us, at least, that I know of.
My mom loves that show. I've never watched it, but now I'm a little curious. Also, that guy sounds absolutely terrible. I'm shocked that he's able to get so many girlfriends all things considered.
The guy was terrible, but also highly charismatic. And when you prey on 16-20 year old girls, it's easy to impress them. Anyone who has a car and an apartment looks impressive to a high school senior.
It's a good show, you should watch it! I think it might be on Hulu.com, but I haven't checked.
I'll put you on the filter if I make one. I've never made a filter before, so I'm not sure if I will:) I'm sort of lazy about hiding my TMI on the internet.
I vaguely did the poly thing years ago, but as zevhonith said, it was mostly a "I actually just wanna sleep with whomever I want" situation. Dude in your case sounds like a complete jerk, yet I'm not surprised he was able to pull so many women around him. If you do create a filter, I'd love to be included as well, if you're comfortable with that.
I'm probably not going to create a filter until the inevitable happens and my mother discovers LJ. Then my Livejournal will go friends-only or filtered. I'm just way too lazy to figure out the filter function.
Yeah, in retrospect, I wonder why this guy was so popular. I guess he was just tall, charismatic, and had a penchant for young girls with low self-esteem who were dying for an older man to tell them they're special. What happened with your 'poly thing'? Did it not work out? Was it fun? Inquiring minds, etc!
Oh gosh. Um, it wasn't ... awful, necessarily, but it wasn't something I could handle really well at the time. It was my idea ... and it wasn't incredibly bright, the way we executed it. I was in a monogamous relationship and bored, so we opened it up and sort of welcomed in whomever. I was 19 at the time, so you being in yours at 17 (yeah?) is sorta mind-boggling, to me. I wasn't an incredibly self-aware kid at the time.
Anyway, yeah, it was fun when it was good (y'know, when you'd wake up to four or five other naked bodies in bed with you), but it was awful once jealousy kicked in (and it did with a vengeance). We did the whole date-night thing with people splitting off with whomever for the evening, and some nights we all joined up for group stuff. It probably would've been alright, but like I said, I wasn't terribly mature about things. It's a wonder to me that the friends we had who got dragged into that tangle are still friends of mine today.
I know. I try to keep things neutral and discrete in my LJ, in case he wanders across it through Meg or Teal or any of the other people who know this is my journal. Clearly, I'm not great at discretion when I hit rant-mode.
I would say fuck discretion, but I can understand not wanting him to find this. The dickwad would probably take it as a chance to attack you, and that would not be fun.
Still, I think people should be allowed to rant once in a while. Maybe you could friendslock it if you're worried about it?
Fuck him. You know how much he hates having his personal business out on the internet. The man is one of the most paranoid people I've ever met. (My take: if the government wants dirt on me, they'll probably find it whether I have a livejournal or not.) Anyway, back on topic. Fuck him. Start a lj called "ThisguywillgiveyouHPV" or "DONTFUCKHIM!"...oh, the possibilities are endless! Bare your soul as much as you are comfortable, and dont worry about him finding it.
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It wasn't all bad, though, just most of it. If I make a filter, I'll put you in it:)
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And I am at least as interested in hearing about how the women tried to make it work as I am in hearing about how the man screwed it up. ;)
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Out of curiousity, how many poly people have you known? In my little section of California, there's not many of us, at least, that I know of.
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The guy was terrible, but also highly charismatic. And when you prey on 16-20 year old girls, it's easy to impress them. Anyone who has a car and an apartment looks impressive to a high school senior.
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I'll put you on the filter if I make one. I've never made a filter before, so I'm not sure if I will:) I'm sort of lazy about hiding my TMI on the internet.
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Yeah, in retrospect, I wonder why this guy was so popular. I guess he was just tall, charismatic, and had a penchant for young girls with low self-esteem who were dying for an older man to tell them they're special. What happened with your 'poly thing'? Did it not work out? Was it fun? Inquiring minds, etc!
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Anyway, yeah, it was fun when it was good (y'know, when you'd wake up to four or five other naked bodies in bed with you), but it was awful once jealousy kicked in (and it did with a vengeance). We did the whole date-night thing with people splitting off with whomever for the evening, and some nights we all joined up for group stuff. It probably would've been alright, but like I said, I wasn't terribly mature about things. It's a wonder to me that the friends we had who got dragged into that tangle are still friends of mine today.
Are inquiring minds satisfied? :)
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That guy really needs to be fed his own balls.
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Still, I think people should be allowed to rant once in a while. Maybe you could friendslock it if you're worried about it?
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