"Real isn't how you're made," said the skin horse. "It's things that happen to you when a child loves you for a long long time. Not just to play with, but REALLY loves you. Then you become real ( Read more... )

so, she came over to see me last night....poor me, injured and all alone. she cooked dinner, and rented movies, and she stayed the night. it was so very nice waking up next to someone....and i didn't freak out. there wasn't that intense, "oh god, i wish you would get out of my bed and go home" feeling. she just lay there and we talked all night ( Read more... )

so i have new interests. and by that, of course, i mean someoneand she's sweet, and she has the most amazing voice (i could listen to her all day). she likes golf (which i hate), and music that i've never heard, and baseball, and cooking (she makes amazing dinners), and she listens to me ramble....with this kind of amused expression on her face ( Read more... )

hmmm...maybe a long, hot bath, a glass of chardonnay, and a few episodes of The L Word.

that should help insure that tonight wasn't a complete loss....or at least make me feel better about it.

I know you think that I shouldn't still love you ( Read more... )

hmm....time to start making more reasonable decisions. evidently orgasms, cigarettes, and massive quantities of alcohol really aren't going to help me forget her. oh well. just wish i had realized that before this weekends hangover.

"It's a million times better to risk being deserted or betrayed than to withdraw into a fortress of alienation, shut the door and break the contact with others. Because then we really die. That is death. that is emotional death."---Nin

i've gotten a plethora of advice on how to get over heartbreak.

most common: to get over someone, get under someone.
an orgasm and a cigarette....works every time.

i tried. it was great. and then it was over. in all, it was just sex. and in the end, all i felt was empty.

to him:i lay there beside you ( Read more... )

Your Winter ( Read more... )

Enough whiney heartbreak shit. I'm getting over YOU.

or at least learning to live well, without you in my life.