Why do feelings fluctuate so much? Or does this happen to those who just aren't purely and deeply in love with someone? Why does my heart hurt at times... yet seem disconcerned during other times? Is it because I'm too simple to understand the depth of love? Or I was in love but have so easily fallen out of it? I blame myself for my lack of ( Read more... )

i wanted to kiss him. but how can i do so over audio? and why was i reluctant? maybe cause i'd be like kissing the microphone and that would be bloody stupid... but i really really..... wish i could be there physically for him. a hug is somehing so simple yet it's medicine for the heart and mind. Only thing i can really do is, let him vent to ( Read more... )

Okay yesterday night was like... oh my... goodness... Alan.. sheeshhh! Why did he have to be.. so.. friggin.. brave? But I was half right, he called up both his parents when he was only looking for his mom's opinion. The dad's answer was expected, making me HALF RIGHT but his mom's cool with the age issue. But then Alan hasn't told her the ( Read more... )

EDIT!!! This entry has been deleted. LOLOLOL.

Yesterday, I did manage to go out with Janice after 6 pm. She was shopping for Japanese magazines and I was looking for everything else. I bought like two pairs of earrings, bracelets, and several clothes. Man... I splurggeedddd. I now understand the feeling... of intense insecurity. The more I consume, the emptier I become. Is my glass half ( Read more... )

Since my job varies from being super mundane to super chaotic from time to time, I use the minutes of being bored to look at people who walk by the store. So many people, so many styles, morals, attitudes, each take on. You dote on them as though you can read them as they walk past you. I see older generation couples holding hands, it makes me ( Read more... )

Well I was just browsing on friendster using Hai's account lmao, and all I wanted to see was Alan's page. LOL. Going into it... looking at his edible sporks picture just made me go all gooey inside. ^-^ I tilted my head to one side and just smiled. Of all the pictures he chose to use, he chose the one i screen saved XD I love what he does, he ( Read more... )

Yesterday started out weird for me, I had no idea Alan was frustrating over me. I felt so.... sjfklsdfds. He was frustrating over something I laughed about ^____________________^ So we were on the phone for like 2 hours, he kept trying to get it out of me, but DAMNNN I've never felt so exposed ever... and it was funny cause he tried to make ( Read more... )

After getting an answer from my mother, I took it as my way of reaching an answer from God. I needed guidance, if God wasn't assisting me, or I don't feel that he has, I ask my mother, so I ended up telling her that I had someone in mind, that someone's Alan. My mom knew all along, she was just waiting for me to finally bring it up to her. She ( Read more... )

Today is such a beautiful day, but all I was doing was lying around my bed staring at how bright the lights are seeping in from my window. I'm wide awake, somewhat floating, just thinking about someone. What must I do? I really don't know... so today, I'll be floating around at home, with all these bright lights, it's such a ging day, but why ( Read more... )