you'd be forced to face yourself

[gonnafeelgood]

you’d be forced to face yourself
bandom, R, Frank/Gerard/Jamia, ~3200 words.
Written for audreysrev because we both have boundary issues and a kink for threesomes. Title drawn from a line in The Dresden Dolls’ “Modern Moonlight” which shaped the backbone of the story: “stripped of your equipment you'll be forced to face yourself…”. Oh, and not

Comments

[kylieq]

OH MY GOD. OH. MY. GOD.

First of all, JAAAAAAAAMIAAAAAAAAAAAAA. (I think you know my feelings on that matter.)

That last Jamia POV, that was what tipped this over from "awesome" to "perfect" for me. It's so real, and something that most threesome fic (even though I love threesome fic possibly more than kittens) never addresses - the complications, the jealousies, the overinvolvement, the selfishness.

Just...gah. I will be re-reading this several times.

Also, Gerard thinks out loud when he's nervous! He runs away from Jamia, with flappy hands and everything! Yesssss.

[gonnafeelgood]

(I think you know my feelings on that matter.)
YUP. 'Cause I SHARE THEM.

Yeah, it's like I was telling bunny when she beta'ed this - my little poly heart breaks for them, but I also think that this is the kind of shit that happens all the time when 3 people come into a threesome with totally different needs and wants and reasons. And when they stay hidden ... well, this is actually not nearly as bad as it CAN go, you know?

[idyll]

OH HOLY HELL THIS IS BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT!

I'm just....awed. Beyond awed. This is every bit as complicated and conflicted and full of lovedesperationregret as it should be. It's full of twisting wants and confusing desires, and selfishness and honesty, and it's pretty but it's not at the same time. It's real and hard and I love every single word of it!

[gonnafeelgood]

♥ SO HARD. Thank you!!

[marcolette]

This is wonderful. I love threesome fic that's all sweetness and fluff, but this is still a refreshingly complicated look at it. You've made me ache for all of them. And yet, you've kept it hot and light enough that, if I choose to, I can focus just on the light and not on the darkness. To paraphrase a bit.

I'm saddest for Gerard here, but I know he's going to connect with Lyn-z soon, so I don't have to ache too hard for him.

[gonnafeelgood]

*grin* Yeah. It was hard to balance the funny and the sweet and the hot - because I do think the three of them care about each other, you know? I didn't want it to be straight-up cold.

Gee is totally about to meet Lyn-z. And, actually, I think the person that'll hurt the most with that will be JAMIA.

[7iris]

Oh, my heart! I am all about the happy-ending threesomes in fic, but you have the messy, human aspect of it absolutely down here. Funny and hot and bittersweet.

*cough* I have to admit, I think it helps that even though I love Frank/Jamia/Gerard, it is not my OT3 in this fandom. *cough*

[gonnafeelgood]

Heh. See, they might be my OT3. Well, no. That's probably Frank/Jamia/Bob. BUT ... yeah, I have read a lot of schmoopy threesome fic in this fandom and that's AWESOME, you know? But not all threesomes end in a reading of The Ethical Slut and negotiations of boundaries. More of them end like this.

[violin_road]

So I have this problem where I really like threesomes, but then whenever I go to write one, I'm like, but wait, what happens after the sex, what happens to figuring out where the relationships go? And this ... this is the answer to that question, I think.

I keep trying to type sentences but they sort of dissolve into 38slkjlasdsl!!!11, so you, that :D

[gonnafeelgood]

Oh, totally. I mean, sometimes they work out - people have fun or explore poly relationships or something. But sometimes, there's a lot more angsty aftermath than you can ever imagine and, really, this is Gerard Way. It just seems intuitive to me that there would be aftermath.