tea lights (1/8)
title: tea lights
pairing: mark/jackson, jb/jr. (youngjae/yugyeom)
rating: pg-15
summary: in his first year of high school, jackson joins the astronomy club and meets a quiet, star-loving boy called mark.
notes: for 5live and markiepooh :)
year 1, spring
the first day of the first year of high school is freshman orientation. jackson's mum drops him off outside the school gates, zooming away in her car with a kiss on his cheek, a whiff of her perfume and a "have a good day, honey!" he stands outside the school gates, watching the students filter in, a mixture of new and old but already segregated in comfortable cliques, and tries to look more unflappably calm than he's feeling.
it's the beginning of spring, jackson's favourite season because it's right before summer and no longer has the chill of winter. he can't resist enjoying the rustle of dessicated leaves skittering across the courtyard in the last of the autumn winds, the almost indiscernible scent of cherry blossoms borne on the breeze. jackson closes his eyes and imagines he's back in the spring of his fifteenth year again, in his last year of junior high. back then, things had been so innocent and uncomplicated, familiar, free of the unknown and uncertainty. he didn't have to worry about starting out at a new school and making new friends and growing up.
the rattle of rusty bicycle chains startles jackson from his reverie. when he opens his eyes, he sees a boy on a battered bicycle, braked with his scuffed sneakers on the asphalt a distance away. when jackson catches him watching, he immediately drops his gaze and swings himself off the bike clumsily, nearly tripping and taking it down with him. he wheels the bicycle through the school gates, not meeting jackson's inquisitive gaze again, but as he passes jackson notices a curious tinge of red at the tips of his ears.
the bell rings, making jackson jump in alarm, quickly rushing between the gates just before they close. he dashes all the way down the corridor and up two flights of stairs to his homeroom, losing his way twice. when he finally finds the right classroom, he's already five minutes late.
jackson groans inwardly as he raps on the door. what a way to make an entrance on the first day. the homeroom teacher looks up sternly and all the students' heads swivel up to look at him from their seats. jackson avoids their gazes shamefacedly as he mumbles an apology and heads for the only remaining seat in the last row of the classroom, one seat from the back door.
as he unslings his book bag and slumps down in his chair, sweating, the boy sitting beside him at the corner leans over to gush in a low whisper, "cool entrance."
jackson looks up, frowning, but there is no sarcasm in the boy's earnest gaze and cheeks flushed with admiration. he is very cute, in a likeable way, the kind who jackson can guess will probably become one of the popular kids with both girls and guys. but there is something about his smile that is irresistible and infectious. jackson returns it warily.
it's all the encouragement the boy needs. "let's be friends," he declares, moving his desk a few inches closer to jackson's. "i'm jinyoung."
"jackson," jackson says, and jinyoung's mouth forms an impressed O, like jackson's name is as cool as he expected. "i wish i had an english name too," he sighs wistfully.
"you're not chinese," jackson observes, confused.
jinyoung nods, beaming. "i'm korean."
"your chinese is really good."
jinyoung's grin broadens. "thanks. i moved to taiwan when i was ten."
it's jackson's turn to regard jinyoung with admiration. jinyoung giggles, shooting a glance at the teacher who is still droning on about something which neither of them have paid any attention to. "do you want me to teach you korean?"
an hour later, jackson and jinyoung are still busy communicating in hushed whispers and scribbled notes shoved back and forth when the teacher's textbook sails in an arc across the room, landing between them. jinyoung's eyes widen as they both look up with resigned dread to see their teacher's furious glare.
"i cannot believe this," jackson groans, as they stand outside the classroom with their arms raised above their heads, holding up their arithmetic textbooks. "detention on the first day of school? you're really a bad influence."
when he looks over, jinyoung's forehead is damp with sweat but his eyes are gleaming unapologetically. "at least you're 5% more fluent in korean than you were this morning."
"not that much!" jackson rolls his eyes. "well, maybe 1%," he allows, and jinyoung looks vindicated.
after a moment, though, a frown mars his sunny disposition. "are you regretting?" jackson teases, but jinyoung shakes his head. "i just remembered... i have something to do after school."
jackson swallows. "are you making me go for detention alone?" he whines, and jinyoung looks chastised.
he pats jackson's back. "don't worry, i won't abandon a friend in tough times."
after class, however, jackson is the one who approaches the teacher alone and lowers his head humbly, apologizing for the incident and explaining that it was all his fault and that jinyoung was innocent. the teacher thoughtfully listens and thankfully accepts his apology with the promise that he will do two days of detention instead of one and not talk in class again.
jackson slings on his bag, heading out of class and pausing at the door to watch the teacher make his way down the aisle to jinyoung, who is rubbing his sore arms and packing his books. he only stays long enough to watch the expression on jinyoung's face transform from gloomy disappointment to disbelieving relief, before he continues out of the door and down the corridor, wondering why making a stranger who he just met today happy can put such a foolish smile on his face.
with a start, he realizes that the first day of high school which he had dreaded for so long is over. it wasn't as bad as he had feared, and jinyoung had a lot to do with it. even though he doesn't know how he's going to explain to his mother how he got detention on the first day... jackson groans and fishes out his phone, firing off a text message with a lame excuse that his mother is sure to see through in a second.
the classroom where detention is supposed to be held is on the second storey, where the sophomores' classrooms are. jackson peers in gingerly to see that it is still empty except for a teacher sitting at the front desk who beckons him in. no one is dumb enough to get detention on their first day.
jackson sighs heavily after passing his slip to the teacher and settles behind a desk at the back of the room. he pillows his head on his bag and stares out of the slatted aluminium windows at the students filing out of the school gates, drunk with freedom, laughing and shouting about where to go to have fun after school.
his eyelids are drooping sleepily when a knock on the door makes him jerk up, wiping a thread of drool. jackson stifles a gasp when he sees the boy with the bike from the morning standing in the threshold of the classroom, looking bored and scruffy.
the teacher looks at him with resigned recognition, as if this isn't the first time he's been here, and holds out a hand for his slip. the boy slaps a dog-eared piece of paper into her hand and turns to face the classroom. when he sees jackson, his eyes widen in recognition, looking him up and down with something like bemused respect.
jackson feels his face growing warm, bristling inwardly at this insolent senior thinking jackson is one of his kind, a delinquent. from his untucked and obviously unironed uniform shirt, the shadows beneath his sleepy, hooded eyes, he's obviously an empty-headed stoner, probably a repeat student, jackson thinks contemptuously. he deliberately closes his eyes and breaks their connected gazes, lowering his head back onto his bag again and pretending to be sound asleep, unaware of the approaching footsteps of the boy as he weaves slowly down the aisle and the scrape of chair legs on floor as he settles down a few rows in front of jackson.
when jackson jolts awake, the afternoon light is a few shades dimmer and the teacher is gone from her desk but the boy is still in front of him, shoulders slumped as he slouches unmoving in his seat. jackson blinks at the back of his head, his tufted hair sticking up in a cowlick. the only indication that he's not sleeping upright is the muffled rap music drifting from the earphones dangling from his ears, audible even from this distance. his gaze flickers to the clock on the wall above the whiteboard. it reads 4.48pm. another twelve minutes to the end of detention. jackson quietly rejoices that he had managed to sleep through it or he'd have been bored out of his skull staring at the back of the boy's head for two hours, the too-long hair at the nape of his neck curling over his collar.
jackson sits up quickly as the teacher walks back into the classroom, presumably from the toilet. the boy doesn't even flinch, only lifting his ipod up from under the table and running his thumb over the screen.
jackson pretends to be doing his homework for the rest of the period, hoping the teacher will not remark on his shameless napping. luckily, she only reminds him to come back again tomorrow as he files past her with his head down after they are dismissed. the boy is a few paces behind him, and jackson feels inexplicably embarrassed at the thought that he might've heard. he doesn't understand why he cares about what this stranger thinks of him. it's not like jackson is a good boy, a geeky, studious nerd. but he's not exactly a bad boy either, the kind who will get two days of detention in a row on the first day of freshman year. apparently, though, this boy is.
jackson doesn't look back as he trudges down the now-deserted corridor, the school inordinately tranquil and quiet without the garrulous chatter of hordes of students thronging the corridor. quiet enough to hear the slap of the boy's soles on the ground behind him, his shuffling footsteps and the white noise of the music emitting from the earbuds still plugged into his ears.
the boy continues following him down the one flight of stairs and towards the nearly-closed school gates, though to be fair this is probably the only route out of school. jackson slips through the gap in the corrugated iron gates and starts down the sidewalk towards the nearest bus stop. it's the sleepiest hour of the afternoon and the roads are almost as empty as the corridors at school, only a lone car occasionally puffing leisurely by. jackson can't resist slowing his pace and enjoying the onset of spring, the breeze making fallen maple leaves dance over the asphalt.
jackson has his pick of the seats at the bus stop when he arrives, and he sinks down with satisfaction on the choicest one. he peers into the distance impatiently in anticipation of the bus's arrival and pretends not to notice that the boy has settled unobtrusively onto a scarred seat at the corner of the bus stop. there's something about the slope of his shoulders, the way he carries himself, that makes jackson feel like he wants to fade into the background, unnoticed, anonymous.
when jackson's bus comes chugging down the lane, finally, the boy stops shadowing him. jackson climbs aboard and throws himself down in a seat by the window, catching a glimpse of the boy still immersed in his ipod, his head lowered and bobbing slightly to an invisible beat as the bus rolls away.
"honey!" his mother smothers him in a distressed hug the moment he walks into the house. "what happened? why did you get detention on your first day? did you get into a fight, darling?"
jackson suffers her embrace and hurriedly eases her worries with a vague excuse, leaving out the information that he has another day to serve tomorrow. "i made a friend!" he says brightly, knowing the news will distract her.
predictably, his mother's face lights up. "really, sweetheart? that's amazing! what's his name?"
"jinyoung," jackson mumbles, feeling weirdly proud at saying jinyoung's name for the first time. he hadn't realized how pleased he was of successfully making a friend too.
"he sounds wonderful!" his mother enthuses, clapping her hands in delight. "you must invite him home one of these days. i'll bake cookies."
jackson evades a promise with a few monosyllabic grunts, and drags his feet to his room. "i'm dead beat, mum," he whines.
"poor thing, get some rest then! i'll call you when dinner's ready."
when jackson opens his eyes the next morning, he forgets for a split second and thinks he's still in junior high. he half expects to hear his best friend, nicholas, shouting up to him from outside his window to wake up sleepyhead or they'd be late for school. after being classmates for all three years of junior high, they had sadly been separated into different high schools. they had promised to keep in touch, but to jackson it was a tragedy no less poignant than titanic.
then he remembers that at least he has jinyoung, and it's a bright spot in the daunting day ahead that he'll be meeting him again. jackson might be displaced, but at least he won't be alone.
when jackson walks into class, jinyoung is sitting on his desk swinging his legs back and forth, presiding over a gaggle of classmates jackson doesn't know. jackson bites his lip, trying not to look as left out as he feels as he slinks past and squeezes into his seat, hiding behind his bag.
but when jinyoung notices him, he exclaims with genuine warmth, "jackson!"
jackson smiles weakly as jinyoung says with his eyes wide, "dude, can you believe these guys all want to learn korean?"
to the others, he announces with a big grin, "guys, this is my best friend and T.A., jackson."
"T.A.?" jackson sputters, even though what he's mentally freaking out over is the best friend part. "i barely know three words of korean!"
jinyoung slaps him on the back reassuringly. "don't worry, it doesn't matter because you look korean."
"i do?" jackson is confused but flattered.
jinyoung nods enthusiastically. "you're the hottest guy in class. excluding me, of course," he adds arrogantly.
the girls clustered around them don't seem to disagree as jackson blushes and laughs in pleased embarrassment.
"why don't you start a korean club?" jackson suggests later as they are splitting a bag of chips at break. "seems like it would attract lots of chicks." their homeroom teacher had just briefed them on the mandatory school rule for every student to join one or more extracurricular club in their first year.
jinyoung laughs and shakes his head. "i've already decided on what club to join."
"what?" jackson gapes.
"astronomy," jinyoung declares dreamily.
jackson frowns. "are you into that?"
"nope."
"then why...?"
jinyoung stands up abruptly, almost upsetting his chair. his eyes glow with manic excitement as he grabs jackson's arm and practically hauls him out of the classroom and down the corridor, in the direction of the cafeteria.
when they arrive at the bustling cafeteria, jinyoung scours the crowd impatiently with his eyes, eventually seeming to locate what he's searching for. "sit down," he hisses, and they duck onto a bench, behind the heads of a row of students as two seniors saunter past, deep in conversation and taking no notice of them.
"because," jinyoung whispers, and jackson follows the direction of his starry eyes to the retreating back of the taller one.
jackson pries the details out of jinyoung after school, and jinyoung confides to him that he has been looking at this senior -- im jaebum -- since his first year of junior high. at first, he caught jinyoung's eye because he was the only other korean in their school. but later, he held it for much more different reasons -- because despite that, he had managed to become the head prefect, respected, adored, liked by everybody. in a country far away from home, jaebum had managed to shine all the same. and -- "god, he's gorgeous," jinyoung sighs. "i mean, i'm good-looking, but he's in a whole different league."
"sounds like someone has a crush," jackson teases, and jinyoung doesn't even bother to deny it, his cheeks flushed dazedly. "an unrequited one," he corrects softly, looking wistful, and jackson's chest tugs with sympathy.
"why don't you confess?" he says gently, and jinyoung looks horrified.
"and completely freak him out and be known as that creepy gay freshman from now on?" he cries shrilly.
"maybe he'll like you too? i thought you knew you're the cutest freshman in school," he jokes.
jinyoung just looks depressed and far from confident, and jackson realizes that he probably only brags to hide his insecurity. "i'm pretty sure he's straight as an arrow."
jackson considers this and figures it has its logic. he can't imagine those honour student, straight-laced campus hunk types not having the campus babes as their girlfriends. "then... maybe just being friends is better than nothing."
jinyoung nods, smiling a little. "that's what i thought. so, will you join the astronomy club with me?"
"what?" jackson yelps. "i know even less about astronomy than korean!"
"please?" jinyoung turns liquid puppy-brown eyes on him. "i'm too wimpy to join alone."
"... fuck my life," jackson moans in english.
an epiphany dawns on jackson as he trails at jinyoung's feet reluctantly, following him to the astronomy club as jinyoung anxiously messes with his hair, combing it with his fingers -- he probably likes jinyoung more than he realizes. there are two reasons why: firstly, the obvious is that he is joining the astronomy club, for fuck's sake. the second is that he is surprised to find that he doesn't mind as much as he thought he would that jinyoung is gay. or bisexual, at least.
it's not like jackson is homophobic. coming from an all-boys junior high, he knew that it was more common than people knew, especially at this hormonal, testosterone-driven age. it's just that he hadn't guessed that jinyoung was into boys, even with all his fanboying over jackson.
his ruminations are interrupted by jinyoung's footsteps scuffing to an abrupt stop as he skids to a halt outside a classroom in the other wing of the school, a building which houses the chemistry labs, staff offices, sports hall and auditorium. jackson nearly walks into his back. jinyoung looks uncharacteristically pale and panicky as he bares his teeth at jackson. "do i have spinach in my teeth?"
jackson snorts. "no. did you even eat it?"
jinyoung ignores his question, heaving a sigh of relief as he tentatively sticks his head into the classroom and peeks from behind the door. jackson laughs mischievously and shoves him in.
jinyoung tumbles headfirst into the classroom without knocking, jackson falling in after him. they stumble to catch their balance, looking up to see almost ten pairs of eyes watching them inquisitively, most bespectacled, all second and third years.
jinyoung chokes out an incoherent squeak. jackson hurriedly translates, "hi! is this the astronomy club?"
a boy steps out from behind, and jackson recognizes him as jinyoung's jaebum. his eyes are amused as he takes off his nerdy chic glasses. "yes. i'm jaebum, the vice-president. can i help you?"
jinyoung opens his mouth eagerly, and jackson is afraid he's going to say something stupid and irrevocable, but thankfully jinyoung is shrewder than he expected.
"hi," he says, voice shy but remarkably composed. "nice to meet you. i'm jinyoung and he's jackson. we're first years and we love astronomy. can we join the club?"
jaebum dons his glasses again and squints skeptically at them, and jackson helpfully nods convincingly and adds, "absolutely adore it," laying it on thick.
"well, we don't have any first-year members yet..." jaebum hesitates, and jinyoung's breath catches audibly as he gazes at jaebum with hopeful puppydog eyes.
jaebum looks startled by the intensity of his gaze, and relents, flustered, "... but i guess it's okay, since you guys are so passionate."
jinyoung squeezes jackson's hand in a bone-crushing grip. "thanks, hyung!" the korean words seem to slip out of his mouth unconsciously, and he looks equally startled by them as jaebum does.
"are you korean?" he says, eyes no longer roving absently between them but honing in on jinyoung and focusing seriously.
jinyoung nods bashfully, and blurts out, "we were from the same junior high too."
jaebum's eyes widen, and jackson senses that jinyoung is slipping into creepy stalker territory. dutifully as best friend, he quickly launches into damage control, elbowing jinyoung hard in warning and blurting out the first question that comes to mind loudly. "who's the president?"
jinyoung lets out a muffled oof, and jaebum looks confused by the sudden change of subject but reluctantly tears his attention away from jinyoung to answer jackson politely. "he's... not in."
another senior in the group gathered around the meeting table interjects, "he hasn't been by for awhile. nowadays, jaebum's practically the one in charge around here."
jaebum laughs and shakes his head modestly. "mark's just busy. and he's done a lot for the club. after all, he was the one who created it."
the other senior grudgingly agrees. "we're only keeping him as president because he knows the most about stars," he admits.
mark? jackson thinks. the name strikes him because it's english, in contrast to the chinese names that most students go by. too bad he was on a hiatus, or jackson might have found someone to practice his english with.
jinyoung is practically skipping as they walk back down the corridor towards their classroom, face flushed with excitement. jackson laughs and forgets his reservations about joining a boring geek club. as today's activities were ending soon, jaebum had told them to report the next week with their filled-in application forms so he could officially register them as members.
they are nearing the classroom when jackson suddenly yelps in horror. jinyoung spins around, alarmed. "what?"
"i'm late for detention!" jackson screeches, dashing into class to grab his bag and blowing past a gobsmacked jinyoung. "don't wait for me! i'll text you later."
jackson sprints all the way down the stairs to the second floor, wheezing to a halt in front of the classroom. the teacher looks out of the door and frowns at him disapprovingly, glancing at her watch, and jackson bows apologetically as he shuffles in with a sheepish smile.
after the teacher accepts his slip, jackson turns to face the classroom. the first thing he sees is the same boy from yesterday, sitting in the same seat in the otherwise empty classroom. the only thing that's different is his hair. and it is very different.
while his hair had been a copperish brown yesterday, dark enough to pass as natural, today it is obviously not, bleached into an ashy silver grey and teased into spiky tufts. jackson gapes at it unabashedly as the boy drops his gaze, colour rising in his cheeks at jackson's intense scrutiny.
jackson realizes he's staring and finally tears his eyes away, moving down the aisle towards his usual seat. as he passes the boy, their arms graze briefly, making the hair on jackson's arm stand. the boy's elbow is scraped, his skin warm. jackson surmises that the change in hair colour is probably the reason why he's in detention again, and he wonders why the boy would do such a thing on purpose, knowing that it was against the rules.
the sun sinks slowly into the horizon as the afternoon wears on. at the front of the classroom, the teacher is absorbed in grading papers. the ceiling fan drones lazily above them, making jackson's worksheets flutter weakly and drawing his gaze up to the back of the boy's head again, looking completely different from yesterday with just a change of hair colour. the 4pm sunlight streaming through the dusty windows brings out platinum highlights in his coarse smoke-grey strands, like spun gossamer threads of white silver.
today, surprisingly, he's not plugged into his headphones but instead doodling on a piece of notebook paper, the curve of his shoulders looking as bored as jackson feels. there's something about it that spikes jackson's bravery, making him tear out a page from his own notebook on impulse and scrawl on it, i like your hair.
jackson squints one eye shut as he takes aim, shooting the crumpled ball of paper at the back of the boy's head. it lands almost on target, tumbling down his shoulder to roll to a stop on the floor beside his chair.
the boy turns around slowly, frowning. jackson nods encouragingly at the ball of paper, offering a friendly smile to show that he means no harm, and he looks bewildered as he bends to pick it up and unfolds it hesitantly.
jackson waits with bated breath as the boy reads the note. he stares at it for an endless moment, then places it on his desk. jackson thinks he's going to ignore it, but then he sees the boy fishing a pen from his pencilcase and lowering his head to write something on the note.
jackson hurriedly casts his gaze down as the boy turns. he feels the gentle thud of something landing with remarkably accurate aim on his table, and tries not to unravel it too eagerly.
the boy has scribbled a single word in blue pen below jackson's: thanks. but the brevity and simplicity of his reply is softened by the cute smiley face at the end, and jackson looks up, his breath catching. although he can't see the boy's face, he imagines that he's biting his lip to hide it as he smiles foolishly at the whiteboard, much like the way jackson is.
maybe he wasn't as bad a guy as jackson had first thought, he thinks as he ambles towards the bus stop, hearing the boy's footfalls trailing a distance behind him, their rhythm oddly calming and not bothering him as much as they did the first time.
the bus stop is empty again, all the students having long left at dismissal. jackson swings his legs and studies his sneakers as he waits for the bus. he is surprised when the bench creaks and the boy settles down beside him, an arm's length away but undeniably much closer than yesterday.
jackson's heart leaps oddly, even though the boy just stares blankly into the distance and doesn't say anything. he really does seem kind of cool, especially with that platinum blond hair. and he has the added distinction of being a senior, giving him an air of unattainable maturity.
because the volume of his music isn't as loud as yesterday, jackson doesn't notice that his earbuds are hanging from his ears until he says, "did they ask you to dye it back?"
surprisingly though, the boy doesn't look bothered but unplugs his earphones easily and replies, seeming to have heard with no problem. "yeah," he shrugs with a resigned half-smile. his voice is unexpectedly deep and low, catching jackson off guard for a moment.
"what a waste!" he exclaims indignantly. the boy looks surprised by his outburst.
jackson blushes but says, "no, seriously. that sucks. you should take a selca to commemorate it, at least."
"sel...ca?" the boy repeats hesitantly.
jackson can't resist laughing out loud, and the boy looks mildly miffed, like he thinks jackson is laughing at him. jackson hurriedly clarifies, "it's just that i'm not surprised. you don't look like... a selca kind of person."
"i know what it is," the boy says testily. "i'm just not into taking them."
jackson takes in the sunshine splashed over his artistically tousled hair, making it gleam almost flaxen, the row of matching silver piercings glittering from his ear. it seems ironical for such an unnarcissistic person to be blessed with such photogenic looks.
jackson doesn't reply, just reaches out for the ipod in the boy's hand. the boy shrinks away reflexively, startled, but jackson smiles and pries it gently from his grasp. "can i borrow this a second? i think there's a camera function."
he fiddles with the touch pad, finally locating the camera button which makes the screen open into a mirror which suddenly reflects both of them. jackson's other hand instinctively goes up to fix his hair as he raises the ipod over their heads, tilting it to find the best angle.
the boy's face hovers in the background, their differing distances to the camera making it about half the size of jackson's. jackson huffs. is he deliberately trying to make jackson look ugly? his face is already big enough as it is. but too lazy to bother to coax the boy to the front and guessing that probably no one else will ever see it anyway, he snaps a careless picture. it comes out remarkably clear and well-lit, the filter of natural sunlight flattering their skin.
jackson passes the ipod back to the boy, who squints at the photo with unreadable eyes. he eventually closes it and pockets the ipod again without comment. at this moment, the boy's bus arrives. he gets to his feet, not looking back until jackson pipes up, almost drowned out by the rumbling of the engine: "what's your name?"
the boy stops outside the bus doors, turning back for a brief second. a whisper of a smile plays at the edges of his lips. "yi-en," he replies softly, so softly jackson doesn't know if he caught the two chinese syllables correctly.
having answered, he expects the boy -- yi-en -- to board the bus. instead, he lingers, startling jackson with his first expression of any interest or initiative ever since they met. "what's yours?"
jackson opens his mouth, about to reply with his english name, but inexplicably, what comes out is his chinese one. he prefers to go by his english name most of the time because he thinks his chinese one is less pretty and difficult to pronounce, but when he says, "jia-er," yi-en's eyes light up.
he mouths jackson's name silently, as if commiting it to memory, as he finally turns to climb aboard the bus, the doors closing behind him. jackson watches as he meanders down the aisle, looking for an empty seat and sliding into one near the back, by the window. as the bus zooms away, jackson catches his eyes for a heartbeat and it's probably his imagination but he thinks he sees yi-en smile uncertainly.
jackson doesn't see yi-en after that day, since he doesn't go to detention and he doesn't expect that yi-en goes daily either. he doesn't seem to be as much a delinquent as jackson first thought. once, a week later, jackson catches a glimpse of him outside the second-years' classrooms one storey down, and almost doesn't recognize him because his hair is now a jet-black that is even darker than his original dark chocolate shade. it's unstyled and falling over his eyes, his shirttails falling out as he sidles down the corridor and out of jackson's line of vision, alone, his head down.
jackson wonders if he has any friends and is surprised by the pang of pity he feels. then jinyoung nudges him to get his attention, and jackson is distracted.
sometimes when he's walking from the bus stop to school or to the bus stop after school, he hears a familiar rattling of bicycle chains and turns to see yi-en breezing past him on his bike, a blur of speed and windswept hair, too quickly for jackson to even call a greeting. he vaguely wonders why yi-en had taken the bus those two days after detention even though he had a bike, but it only crosses his mind for a second.
they've gotten into the routine of attending club activities every tuesday afternoon. after the bell rings, jackson and jinyoung will troop to the astronomy club without even having lunch first because jinyoung is too excited and doesn't want to miss a single possible minute of seeing jaebum. instead, he usually fixes a huge bento box of bulgogi sandwiches or kimbap which, on the pretext of sharing with the other members, he tremblingly offers jaebum one. jaebum will look up from whatever intricate model of the galaxy he's assembling, peeling off his glasses, small eyes disappearing into a smile of surprised pleasure as he accepts the food gratefully.
to his surprise, jackson is scouted to join the fencing club too by mino, a senior who had been in their junior high fencing team with him. it seems like he's getting roped unwittingly into all these different clubs and activities without himself planning to, but jackson can't say no to his friends and at least he has more interest in fencing than astronomy.
one tuesday, towards the end of their meeting, jaebum looks thrilled as he informs them proudly that there will be a predicted meteor shower a few nights later and that their club has been granted permission to camp at school overnight to watch and observe it.
jinyoung's eyes widen as he squeezes jackson's hand. jackson can read the disbelieving thoughts in his eyes like a book. an entire night with jaebum? jackson groans. he was planning on worming his way out of it but guesses that jinyoung will not allow it.
"come on!" jinyoung wheedles as they leave the school together. "it'll be fun! how can you miss such a beautiful thing?"
jackson snorts. "would this beautiful thing you're referring to be happen to be called im jaebum?" he snarks, voice heavy with sarcasm.
jinyoung blushes furiously and jackson can't bear to continue teasing him.
on friday night, they assemble in the deserted school courtyard, dressed in comfortable tracksuits with overnight duffels and sleeping bags. the silvery moonlight illuminates the granite compound and a faint night breeze chills their skin. jaebum's sports jacket is zipped dorkily all the way up to his chin, but jinyoung swoons, "he's so hot," and jackson thinks he's seriously screwed.
when all the members have assembled in the darkened courtyard and jaebum has taken attendance, he still doesn't make a move to go, glancing distractedly at his watch.
"are you waiting for someone?" jinyoung pipes up, confused, and jaebum is opening his mouth to answer when jackson hears footsteps and turns to see a familiar but unexpected face. yi-en rushing across the courtyard, skidding to a halt before them and bending to catch his breath with his hands on his knees.
jackson just blinks for a moment, unable to reconcile yi-en appearing at this time, on this night, at the astronomy club. it's the very last place he had expected to see him again. but one of the seniors shout in surprise, "president, you came!" and jaebum smiles and explains to them, "i asked mark to come help out today."
"mark?" jackson blurts out before he can catch himself. "isn't your name yi-en?"
yi-en swivels around, eyes widening when he finally notices jackson standing in the shadows at the corner of the group. however, he doesn't seem as surprised to see jackson as jackson feels to see him, and he has an odd feeling that maybe mark already knew he was in the club. after all, he was the mysterious president.
mark shoots him a small, nervous smile of acknowledgement, and answers jackson's question which he belatedly realizes sounds a little accusatory. "it's my english name."
"yi-en," jinyoung repeats, sounding out the syllables in his korean-accented chinese, and jaebum and mark chorus at the same time, "he doesn't like being called that," and "just call me mark."
jinyoung's mouth falls open as he absorbs this. a slow, impish grin spreads over his face. "oh, i see. so jackson is the only one who's allowed to call you that?"
abruptly, jackson realizes how it sounds and mark seems to also at the same moment, a tinge of red dusting across his cheekbones, visible even in the dark. "it's not like that. i --"
"relax," jinyoung laughs loudly. "just kidding, mark."
mark looks relieved, and quickly launches into soft-spoken but authoritative instructions to the group members, who follow them obediently. he is obviously equally respected by the club as jaebum.
with flashlights and blankets to spread on the grass and keep warm, they climb up the small hill. in the dark, jinyoung trips over a tree root, and jaebum catches him before he loses his balance. "careful there," he says, voice kind, and stays behind jinyoung quietly for the rest of the journey. if only mark were as caring a senior -- but no, he's taking absolutely no notice of them, lingering at the very back of the group and conversing in low voices with a few senior members.
however, later, when jackson has spread out his blanket and lay down with his head pillowed by his hands on the grassy slope, a distance from the rest of the group, mark approaches. he doesn't say anything but simply settles his own blanket beside jackson, lying back with a soft sigh. jackson stares up at the swirling patterns of the stars, unable to see mark but only hear the even push-pull of his breathing beside him.
"they're all connected, you know," mark says softly, and jackson finally turns to look at him. the chiseled lines of his profile are silhouetted by the iridescent starlight, and his eyes gleam like coal. jackson looks at him questioningly, and mark elaborates, "the tides and the moon and the stars." he tells jackson about the ebb and flow of the tides, the cycles of the moon and the aligning of the stars, his voice mellow and soothing as the words wash over jackson. all of a sudden, a streak of light flashes across the canvas of the sky, so quickly jackson would've missed it if he blinked.
"is that a shooting star?" he gasps, and can hear similar exclamations of delight from the nearby cluster of members.
mark smiles and nods, and jackson can hardly contain his excitement as he keeps his eyes peeled, not wanting to miss the next one. "it's started," mark states, his calm voice unable to hide his own exhilaration.
they wait with bated breath, in a silence of infinite depth. after what seems like a lifetime or a heartbeat, another star arcs gracefully across the midnight sky, vapor trailing behind it like a tail before fizzling into the darkness. "it's beautiful," jackson breathes, inexplicably feeling the prickle of tears.
"exquisite," mark agrees quietly.
impossibly, it gets even better as the number of stars start increasing till jackson can no longer keep count of them, exploding into brilliance simultaneously like fireworks bursting through the sky. jackson watches open-mouthed the ocean of stars falling at their feet, raining down on them like a waterfall.
"make a wish," mark suggests, and jackson instinctively closes his eyes. when he opens them, mark has torn his eyes away from the sky and is looking at jackson, like it's the first time he's seeing him. when jackson notices, he immediately shifts his gaze away.
they fall silent until the last of the magnificent spectacle fades, and then stand up to join the rest of the members discussing the panorama they've just seen in thrilled voices as they descend the hill.
the next morning, jackson wakes up, groggy and disoriented to jinyoung's impatient nagging. he crawls out of his sleeping bag and sees that most of the others' are already empty in the rows they are arranged in in the auditorium. jackson sniffles and sneezes, coughing a little. jinyoung looks concerned. "did you catch a cold?"
"mmm," jackson grunts grouchily, struggling to his feet and moving to rummage in his bag for his toothbrush and toothpaste. he assures jinyoung that he can go for breakfast first and he'll join him later, and makes his way alone to the row of sinks outside the boys' toilet. as it's saturday, the school is deserted, the morning breeze pleasantly chilly but making jackson shiver slightly and his nose run.
he clumsily brushes his teeth and uses his cupped palms to scoop water from the faucet to rinse his mouth. when he's wiping his running nose on the sleeve of his shirt, wishing he had some tissues, mark steps out of the toilet, morning dew glimmering on his freshly-washed face, clad in a sports jacket with the school's logo emblazoned across the front.
a smile flickers across his eyes when he sees jackson, but it is quickly replaced by a frown as he walks closer and takes him in. "why is your face so red?" he says brusquely, hand coming up without warning to rest on jackson's forehead. "are you sick?" he demands.
jackson mumbles something incoherent, too shocked and dizzy to reply properly. mark curses under his breath and unzips his jacket, stripping it off. he's only wearing a threadbare gym shirt underneath but doesn't seem to notice the cold, draping the jacket clumsily over jackson's shoulders and tucking the collar tightly around his neck. "you'd better go home first," he says authoritatively. "i'll let jaebum know," and jackson abruptly realizes the reason for his actions. of course, it's not because he cares. it's simply because he's the president and it's his duty. jackson smiles bitterly at his foolishness.
"i'll return your jacket," is all he says as he turns and walks away without a backward glance, hearing mark's exhalation of annoyance behind him but no footsteps following after him or voice calling him back.
jackson washes mark's jacket and folds it up neatly, tucking it into his bag the next tuesday as he trudges with jinyoung on the now familiar route towards club. jinyoung makes no secret of the fact that tuesday is his favourite day of the week, for obvious reasons, but jackson doesn't reveal that it has become something he looks forward to as well. he never expected to be interested in astronomy, but then he thinks of mark's sleepy voice during the meteor shower, prickling on the edges of the drizzling stars, and feels an undeniable surge of intrigue.
when they get to club, jackson's heart skips a beat of relief to see mark sitting on a desk in a shaft of afternoon sun, swinging his legs as he reads the latest volume of one piece, dust motes dancing in the light from the window streaming in around him. the rest of the members are gathered around the desk in low discussion and jaebum is working on his model at the back of the class, looking utterly engrossed.
jackson had wondered if mark would be attending future club sessions or if he had only come to help for the special activity. in the case of the latter, he'd have to seek mark out at his classroom and that might've been awkward. jackson fishes the jacket out of his bag and approaches mark, who looks up, his eyes unreadable as they take jackson in.
"hi," jackson says tentatively, and they soften a little, the edges of his lips curling up infinitesimally in a half-smile. "hey."
jackson extends the jacket. "thanks," he says simply, and mark looks surprised, like he'd forgotten he'd lent it to him, but takes it stoically and immediately puts it on, pushing his hands through the sleeves comfortably. he returns to his manga, effectively dismissing jackson.
"yi-en," jackson blurts out, and mark looks up, startled as his eyes flicker around the classroom to see if anyone else has heard. everyone is absorbed in their own activities and mark seems to exhale a small sigh of relief as he looks back at jackson again. "what is it?" mark asks politely, and jackson doesn't know what to say. i just wanted to say your name doesn't seem very appropriate right now. he doesn't know how to explain his sudden urge to breach the distance that seems to have formed between them since the first two days at detention, the insurmountable chasm of one year.
jackson had thought they were friends, at least. maybe he was thinking too much. "nothing," he says shortly, turning to move away. mark doesn't return to his manga, staring at jackson's back with unsettled eyes like jackson has done something he doesn't understand. jackson tries not to notice his gaze as he sits down beside jinyoung at the back of the classroom and starts on his homework.
and so every tuesday goes by much the same way -- jackson walks into club with jinyoung, no longer surprised but still inexplicably lighter to see mark, sitting unobtrusively by the window or joking with jaebum, helping him add the finishing touches to his rapidly expanding model. it's the largest-scale and most intricate model of the galaxy jaebum has ever tried to build, jinyoung informs him proudly. and it looks undeniably impressive, its slow but steady growth reflecting the way the four of them are drawing closer to each other -- jackson and jinyoung, jinyoung and jaebum, jackson and mark.
the days trickle by like droplets of water dripping from a faucet not turned off properly, each drop reverberating a wave of ripples in jackson's heart as it plops onto the surface of the collecting puddle. jackson gradually gets used to high school, much because he has managed to find a space for himself, a group of friends in which he fits in. as promised, jinyoung spends an hour a week after school giving korean lessons to an increasingly expanding group of classmates, including jackson, and jackson regularly attends practice at the fencing club every thursday. but there is a special place in his heart reserved for tuesday afternoons at the astronomy club with jinyoung and mark and jaebum and the other friendly members, lazy and languid and where jackson feels most at ease.
when the makeshift korean classes grow too big for jinyoung to handle alone, he approaches jaebum beseechingly to ask if he could consider helping him out. jaebum agrees readily, his signature eye smile unflagging and delivers true to his word. he appears at their classroom the next monday, drawing awed stares from the boys and hushed giggles from the girls, proceeding to launch into a remarkable lesson as jinyoung's assistant teacher.
"he totally likes you," jackson pronounces as they pack up later after dismissing the students and sending jaebum off with profuse thanks.
"no way!" jinyoung protests vehemently. "he's just being helpful. you know he can't say no to anybody."
jackson purses his lips. "fine. i guess we'll just have to test him then."
"t-test him?" jinyoung squeaks doubtfully.
the next day, jackson turns up to club alone. jaebum looks up, face lighting up when he sees him in the doorway, and peers expectantly behind him, smile slipping a little when no one appears.
"where's jinyoung?" he demands anxiously, and jackson tries not to smile. the plan is going well.
"well?" jaebum snaps impatiently. "is he ill?" mark looks up in concern.
jackson pauses, keeping him waiting deliberately and finally says casually, "nah. he's not coming today because he went out with bomi after school."
"... bomi?" jaebum repeats, looking stunned. "who's that?"
"only the hottest girl in our class," jackson replies offhandedly. he neglects to mention that it's true that bomi and jinyoung went out together, but only as friends, and that she's friends with jackson too. jaebum's face crumples.
"oh. i see," he says, struggling to keep his cheerful, gentle smile in place, even though it doesn't reach his eyes. park jinyoung, you lucky ass, jackson thinks, wishing he could take a photograph of jaebum at this very moment, his eyes lost and bewildered as he mechanically presides over the club meeting, losing concentration more than once and unconsciously snapping at one of the members and proceeding to apologize profusely. it's beyond the shadow of a doubt: jaebum likes jinyoung. impossible as it was, long-unrequited as it was, jinyoung's dream has finally come true.
jackson reports the proceedings to jinyoung the next day, who listens with disbelieving hope and barely concealed glee. "i can't believe it," he keeps murmuring. "you must be pulling my leg."
jackson eventually huffs in exasperation. "fine, you can see it for yourself if you don't believe me."
jaebum turns up the next monday for korean class and is a professional and efficient teacher as usual, but he leaves immediately after that with a perfunctory excuse mumbled in jackson's ear that he has to go somewhere. by tuesday, it's getting obvious that jaebum is avoiding jinyoung.
jackson and jinyoung huddle at the back of the class with mark beside jaebum's galaxy model, which he hasn't touched today. jaebum is sitting at the teacher's desk, importantly firing off instructions to the nodding members who scribble his words down as if they're gospel. jinyoung had barely been able to get a word in edgewise since they arrived and looks dangerously close to tears. jackson feels a pang of sympathy and sneaks a glance at the reassuring mound of mark's slightly slouched shoulders as he copies jaebum's homework. he wonders if mark knows about jinyoung's crush on jaebum, or if he would care even if he did. mark doesn't seem like a person who sweats over things like that and jackson envies his easygoing carelessness.
everything is going wrong and jackson hopes that he hasn't just destroyed jinyoung and jaebum's tenously developing relationship with his brilliant idea. at the end of club, they linger until everyone has left except mark, who is still packing his books slowly into his backpack behind them. jaebum is still sitting at the teacher's desk, unsmiling eyes looking forbidding as he scrawls and flips through some documents.
jinyoung approaches him apprehensively. "hyung..." he starts, but jaebum replies him in chinese instead. after they had realized their shared ethnicity, they usually communicated in rapidfire korean that jackson struggled to keep up with but is increasingly able to discern bits and pieces. but today, jaebum says in fluent chinese, "if you're going to skip club activities as and when you like, you shouldn't have joined in the first place."
his voice is severe and jackson can see jinyoung flinch all the way across the room. reflexively, his defensive instincts kick in and he starts towards them but feels a hand close around his elbow, holding him back. jackson whirls around in surprise to see mark with a look on his face that stops jackson in his tracks.
"i'm disappointed in you," jaebum continues, arranging his papers and getting to his feet before brushing past jinyoung and leaving the classroom without a backward glance.
the room descends into an oppressive silence. the crushed look of dismay on jinyoung's face hurts jackson physically. how had things spiralled out of control so fast? jackson had thought he had it all figured out. behind him, mark has fallen silent too, even the rustling of his papers ceasing. jinyoung doesn't meet either of their eyes as he snatches up his bag, face burning and pivots on his heel, fleeing out of the classroom before jackson can say anything.
jackson clenches his jaw and glares after jaebum, hands reaching for his own bag and feet already starting after him. but a gentle but firm pressure on his arm stops him cold. thoughts racing, jackson turns frowning to see mark's entreating eyes. "my bicycle broke down. can you help me take a look at it?"
jackson blinks a few times, momentarily confused. had mark not just witnessed the scene? anyway, what business was it of jackson's that his bike was broken down? it wasn't like jackson was the resident mechanic, or something.
jackson opens his mouth to say so, but the words die on his tongue at mark's level gaze. maybe mark does know, and is trying to tell jackson in his own way not to get involved. and jackson did owe him a favour. he sighs resignedly and follows mark out of the classroom as he turns off the lights and fan behind them.
mark leads the way to the empty parking lot behind the school building, where a few beat-up bicycles, including his, are chained to a rack. he unlocks the chain with a key from his pocket and bends down beside it, brows creasing as he messes with the gear of the pedals. jackson crouches down beside him and gently elbows him out of the way. "i'll do it," he says gruffly, and mark obediently watches as jackson clumsily attempts to fix the loose bicycle chains.
finally, hands stained with grease and grime, he stands up and says, "try it." mark swings a leg over the bicycle and straddles the seat, cycling a few feet and gingerly testing out the brake.
"it works," he cries, face lighting up into a radiant smile jackson hasn't seen before that makes his heart swell with pride that he had managed to please mark. mark cycles in a wobbly circle around the quadrangle, untucked shirttails looking like wings as they flutter in the breeze. jackson feels a sudden twinge of loneliness at mark looking for all the world as if he's about to take flight without a backward glance, leaving jackson behind.
"hey!" he calls, as mark passes him the last time, brusquely swinging his bag off his shoulder and into the basket between mark's handlebars, and his legs over the back of the bicycle behind mark. he narrowly misses impaling his crotch on the frame but his feet find the jutting spokes of the back wheels in time, grabbing tightly on to mark's shoulders for balance. mark had impressively managed to maintain his balance throughout jackson's sudden and unexpected embarkation, but now he swerves the bike precariously, making jackson yelp and tighten his grip. thankfully, he manages to steady them after a few seconds and then they are rolling down the road at a brisk and breathless pace, bumping and jolting over potholes and the gritty asphalt.
"why did you get on?" mark growls at him, twisting his head up to look back at jackson when they halt at a traffic light. his face is flushed, probably with irritation. it spreads down to his neck, under jackson's fingers and he swallows.
"t-take me home to thank me for repairing your bike," he demands bossily.
+ this is a wip from january that i never got to completing... i don't have concrete plans about how to continue the next chapters yet so suggestions/ideas are welcome :D
+ if anybody missed out my notice, i have reposted my old fics at gotchickoldfics :)
part 2
pairing: mark/jackson, jb/jr. (youngjae/yugyeom)
rating: pg-15
summary: in his first year of high school, jackson joins the astronomy club and meets a quiet, star-loving boy called mark.
notes: for 5live and markiepooh :)
year 1, spring
the first day of the first year of high school is freshman orientation. jackson's mum drops him off outside the school gates, zooming away in her car with a kiss on his cheek, a whiff of her perfume and a "have a good day, honey!" he stands outside the school gates, watching the students filter in, a mixture of new and old but already segregated in comfortable cliques, and tries to look more unflappably calm than he's feeling.
it's the beginning of spring, jackson's favourite season because it's right before summer and no longer has the chill of winter. he can't resist enjoying the rustle of dessicated leaves skittering across the courtyard in the last of the autumn winds, the almost indiscernible scent of cherry blossoms borne on the breeze. jackson closes his eyes and imagines he's back in the spring of his fifteenth year again, in his last year of junior high. back then, things had been so innocent and uncomplicated, familiar, free of the unknown and uncertainty. he didn't have to worry about starting out at a new school and making new friends and growing up.
the rattle of rusty bicycle chains startles jackson from his reverie. when he opens his eyes, he sees a boy on a battered bicycle, braked with his scuffed sneakers on the asphalt a distance away. when jackson catches him watching, he immediately drops his gaze and swings himself off the bike clumsily, nearly tripping and taking it down with him. he wheels the bicycle through the school gates, not meeting jackson's inquisitive gaze again, but as he passes jackson notices a curious tinge of red at the tips of his ears.
the bell rings, making jackson jump in alarm, quickly rushing between the gates just before they close. he dashes all the way down the corridor and up two flights of stairs to his homeroom, losing his way twice. when he finally finds the right classroom, he's already five minutes late.
jackson groans inwardly as he raps on the door. what a way to make an entrance on the first day. the homeroom teacher looks up sternly and all the students' heads swivel up to look at him from their seats. jackson avoids their gazes shamefacedly as he mumbles an apology and heads for the only remaining seat in the last row of the classroom, one seat from the back door.
as he unslings his book bag and slumps down in his chair, sweating, the boy sitting beside him at the corner leans over to gush in a low whisper, "cool entrance."
jackson looks up, frowning, but there is no sarcasm in the boy's earnest gaze and cheeks flushed with admiration. he is very cute, in a likeable way, the kind who jackson can guess will probably become one of the popular kids with both girls and guys. but there is something about his smile that is irresistible and infectious. jackson returns it warily.
it's all the encouragement the boy needs. "let's be friends," he declares, moving his desk a few inches closer to jackson's. "i'm jinyoung."
"jackson," jackson says, and jinyoung's mouth forms an impressed O, like jackson's name is as cool as he expected. "i wish i had an english name too," he sighs wistfully.
"you're not chinese," jackson observes, confused.
jinyoung nods, beaming. "i'm korean."
"your chinese is really good."
jinyoung's grin broadens. "thanks. i moved to taiwan when i was ten."
it's jackson's turn to regard jinyoung with admiration. jinyoung giggles, shooting a glance at the teacher who is still droning on about something which neither of them have paid any attention to. "do you want me to teach you korean?"
an hour later, jackson and jinyoung are still busy communicating in hushed whispers and scribbled notes shoved back and forth when the teacher's textbook sails in an arc across the room, landing between them. jinyoung's eyes widen as they both look up with resigned dread to see their teacher's furious glare.
"i cannot believe this," jackson groans, as they stand outside the classroom with their arms raised above their heads, holding up their arithmetic textbooks. "detention on the first day of school? you're really a bad influence."
when he looks over, jinyoung's forehead is damp with sweat but his eyes are gleaming unapologetically. "at least you're 5% more fluent in korean than you were this morning."
"not that much!" jackson rolls his eyes. "well, maybe 1%," he allows, and jinyoung looks vindicated.
after a moment, though, a frown mars his sunny disposition. "are you regretting?" jackson teases, but jinyoung shakes his head. "i just remembered... i have something to do after school."
jackson swallows. "are you making me go for detention alone?" he whines, and jinyoung looks chastised.
he pats jackson's back. "don't worry, i won't abandon a friend in tough times."
after class, however, jackson is the one who approaches the teacher alone and lowers his head humbly, apologizing for the incident and explaining that it was all his fault and that jinyoung was innocent. the teacher thoughtfully listens and thankfully accepts his apology with the promise that he will do two days of detention instead of one and not talk in class again.
jackson slings on his bag, heading out of class and pausing at the door to watch the teacher make his way down the aisle to jinyoung, who is rubbing his sore arms and packing his books. he only stays long enough to watch the expression on jinyoung's face transform from gloomy disappointment to disbelieving relief, before he continues out of the door and down the corridor, wondering why making a stranger who he just met today happy can put such a foolish smile on his face.
with a start, he realizes that the first day of high school which he had dreaded for so long is over. it wasn't as bad as he had feared, and jinyoung had a lot to do with it. even though he doesn't know how he's going to explain to his mother how he got detention on the first day... jackson groans and fishes out his phone, firing off a text message with a lame excuse that his mother is sure to see through in a second.
the classroom where detention is supposed to be held is on the second storey, where the sophomores' classrooms are. jackson peers in gingerly to see that it is still empty except for a teacher sitting at the front desk who beckons him in. no one is dumb enough to get detention on their first day.
jackson sighs heavily after passing his slip to the teacher and settles behind a desk at the back of the room. he pillows his head on his bag and stares out of the slatted aluminium windows at the students filing out of the school gates, drunk with freedom, laughing and shouting about where to go to have fun after school.
his eyelids are drooping sleepily when a knock on the door makes him jerk up, wiping a thread of drool. jackson stifles a gasp when he sees the boy with the bike from the morning standing in the threshold of the classroom, looking bored and scruffy.
the teacher looks at him with resigned recognition, as if this isn't the first time he's been here, and holds out a hand for his slip. the boy slaps a dog-eared piece of paper into her hand and turns to face the classroom. when he sees jackson, his eyes widen in recognition, looking him up and down with something like bemused respect.
jackson feels his face growing warm, bristling inwardly at this insolent senior thinking jackson is one of his kind, a delinquent. from his untucked and obviously unironed uniform shirt, the shadows beneath his sleepy, hooded eyes, he's obviously an empty-headed stoner, probably a repeat student, jackson thinks contemptuously. he deliberately closes his eyes and breaks their connected gazes, lowering his head back onto his bag again and pretending to be sound asleep, unaware of the approaching footsteps of the boy as he weaves slowly down the aisle and the scrape of chair legs on floor as he settles down a few rows in front of jackson.
when jackson jolts awake, the afternoon light is a few shades dimmer and the teacher is gone from her desk but the boy is still in front of him, shoulders slumped as he slouches unmoving in his seat. jackson blinks at the back of his head, his tufted hair sticking up in a cowlick. the only indication that he's not sleeping upright is the muffled rap music drifting from the earphones dangling from his ears, audible even from this distance. his gaze flickers to the clock on the wall above the whiteboard. it reads 4.48pm. another twelve minutes to the end of detention. jackson quietly rejoices that he had managed to sleep through it or he'd have been bored out of his skull staring at the back of the boy's head for two hours, the too-long hair at the nape of his neck curling over his collar.
jackson sits up quickly as the teacher walks back into the classroom, presumably from the toilet. the boy doesn't even flinch, only lifting his ipod up from under the table and running his thumb over the screen.
jackson pretends to be doing his homework for the rest of the period, hoping the teacher will not remark on his shameless napping. luckily, she only reminds him to come back again tomorrow as he files past her with his head down after they are dismissed. the boy is a few paces behind him, and jackson feels inexplicably embarrassed at the thought that he might've heard. he doesn't understand why he cares about what this stranger thinks of him. it's not like jackson is a good boy, a geeky, studious nerd. but he's not exactly a bad boy either, the kind who will get two days of detention in a row on the first day of freshman year. apparently, though, this boy is.
jackson doesn't look back as he trudges down the now-deserted corridor, the school inordinately tranquil and quiet without the garrulous chatter of hordes of students thronging the corridor. quiet enough to hear the slap of the boy's soles on the ground behind him, his shuffling footsteps and the white noise of the music emitting from the earbuds still plugged into his ears.
the boy continues following him down the one flight of stairs and towards the nearly-closed school gates, though to be fair this is probably the only route out of school. jackson slips through the gap in the corrugated iron gates and starts down the sidewalk towards the nearest bus stop. it's the sleepiest hour of the afternoon and the roads are almost as empty as the corridors at school, only a lone car occasionally puffing leisurely by. jackson can't resist slowing his pace and enjoying the onset of spring, the breeze making fallen maple leaves dance over the asphalt.
jackson has his pick of the seats at the bus stop when he arrives, and he sinks down with satisfaction on the choicest one. he peers into the distance impatiently in anticipation of the bus's arrival and pretends not to notice that the boy has settled unobtrusively onto a scarred seat at the corner of the bus stop. there's something about the slope of his shoulders, the way he carries himself, that makes jackson feel like he wants to fade into the background, unnoticed, anonymous.
when jackson's bus comes chugging down the lane, finally, the boy stops shadowing him. jackson climbs aboard and throws himself down in a seat by the window, catching a glimpse of the boy still immersed in his ipod, his head lowered and bobbing slightly to an invisible beat as the bus rolls away.
"honey!" his mother smothers him in a distressed hug the moment he walks into the house. "what happened? why did you get detention on your first day? did you get into a fight, darling?"
jackson suffers her embrace and hurriedly eases her worries with a vague excuse, leaving out the information that he has another day to serve tomorrow. "i made a friend!" he says brightly, knowing the news will distract her.
predictably, his mother's face lights up. "really, sweetheart? that's amazing! what's his name?"
"jinyoung," jackson mumbles, feeling weirdly proud at saying jinyoung's name for the first time. he hadn't realized how pleased he was of successfully making a friend too.
"he sounds wonderful!" his mother enthuses, clapping her hands in delight. "you must invite him home one of these days. i'll bake cookies."
jackson evades a promise with a few monosyllabic grunts, and drags his feet to his room. "i'm dead beat, mum," he whines.
"poor thing, get some rest then! i'll call you when dinner's ready."
when jackson opens his eyes the next morning, he forgets for a split second and thinks he's still in junior high. he half expects to hear his best friend, nicholas, shouting up to him from outside his window to wake up sleepyhead or they'd be late for school. after being classmates for all three years of junior high, they had sadly been separated into different high schools. they had promised to keep in touch, but to jackson it was a tragedy no less poignant than titanic.
then he remembers that at least he has jinyoung, and it's a bright spot in the daunting day ahead that he'll be meeting him again. jackson might be displaced, but at least he won't be alone.
when jackson walks into class, jinyoung is sitting on his desk swinging his legs back and forth, presiding over a gaggle of classmates jackson doesn't know. jackson bites his lip, trying not to look as left out as he feels as he slinks past and squeezes into his seat, hiding behind his bag.
but when jinyoung notices him, he exclaims with genuine warmth, "jackson!"
jackson smiles weakly as jinyoung says with his eyes wide, "dude, can you believe these guys all want to learn korean?"
to the others, he announces with a big grin, "guys, this is my best friend and T.A., jackson."
"T.A.?" jackson sputters, even though what he's mentally freaking out over is the best friend part. "i barely know three words of korean!"
jinyoung slaps him on the back reassuringly. "don't worry, it doesn't matter because you look korean."
"i do?" jackson is confused but flattered.
jinyoung nods enthusiastically. "you're the hottest guy in class. excluding me, of course," he adds arrogantly.
the girls clustered around them don't seem to disagree as jackson blushes and laughs in pleased embarrassment.
"why don't you start a korean club?" jackson suggests later as they are splitting a bag of chips at break. "seems like it would attract lots of chicks." their homeroom teacher had just briefed them on the mandatory school rule for every student to join one or more extracurricular club in their first year.
jinyoung laughs and shakes his head. "i've already decided on what club to join."
"what?" jackson gapes.
"astronomy," jinyoung declares dreamily.
jackson frowns. "are you into that?"
"nope."
"then why...?"
jinyoung stands up abruptly, almost upsetting his chair. his eyes glow with manic excitement as he grabs jackson's arm and practically hauls him out of the classroom and down the corridor, in the direction of the cafeteria.
when they arrive at the bustling cafeteria, jinyoung scours the crowd impatiently with his eyes, eventually seeming to locate what he's searching for. "sit down," he hisses, and they duck onto a bench, behind the heads of a row of students as two seniors saunter past, deep in conversation and taking no notice of them.
"because," jinyoung whispers, and jackson follows the direction of his starry eyes to the retreating back of the taller one.
jackson pries the details out of jinyoung after school, and jinyoung confides to him that he has been looking at this senior -- im jaebum -- since his first year of junior high. at first, he caught jinyoung's eye because he was the only other korean in their school. but later, he held it for much more different reasons -- because despite that, he had managed to become the head prefect, respected, adored, liked by everybody. in a country far away from home, jaebum had managed to shine all the same. and -- "god, he's gorgeous," jinyoung sighs. "i mean, i'm good-looking, but he's in a whole different league."
"sounds like someone has a crush," jackson teases, and jinyoung doesn't even bother to deny it, his cheeks flushed dazedly. "an unrequited one," he corrects softly, looking wistful, and jackson's chest tugs with sympathy.
"why don't you confess?" he says gently, and jinyoung looks horrified.
"and completely freak him out and be known as that creepy gay freshman from now on?" he cries shrilly.
"maybe he'll like you too? i thought you knew you're the cutest freshman in school," he jokes.
jinyoung just looks depressed and far from confident, and jackson realizes that he probably only brags to hide his insecurity. "i'm pretty sure he's straight as an arrow."
jackson considers this and figures it has its logic. he can't imagine those honour student, straight-laced campus hunk types not having the campus babes as their girlfriends. "then... maybe just being friends is better than nothing."
jinyoung nods, smiling a little. "that's what i thought. so, will you join the astronomy club with me?"
"what?" jackson yelps. "i know even less about astronomy than korean!"
"please?" jinyoung turns liquid puppy-brown eyes on him. "i'm too wimpy to join alone."
"... fuck my life," jackson moans in english.
an epiphany dawns on jackson as he trails at jinyoung's feet reluctantly, following him to the astronomy club as jinyoung anxiously messes with his hair, combing it with his fingers -- he probably likes jinyoung more than he realizes. there are two reasons why: firstly, the obvious is that he is joining the astronomy club, for fuck's sake. the second is that he is surprised to find that he doesn't mind as much as he thought he would that jinyoung is gay. or bisexual, at least.
it's not like jackson is homophobic. coming from an all-boys junior high, he knew that it was more common than people knew, especially at this hormonal, testosterone-driven age. it's just that he hadn't guessed that jinyoung was into boys, even with all his fanboying over jackson.
his ruminations are interrupted by jinyoung's footsteps scuffing to an abrupt stop as he skids to a halt outside a classroom in the other wing of the school, a building which houses the chemistry labs, staff offices, sports hall and auditorium. jackson nearly walks into his back. jinyoung looks uncharacteristically pale and panicky as he bares his teeth at jackson. "do i have spinach in my teeth?"
jackson snorts. "no. did you even eat it?"
jinyoung ignores his question, heaving a sigh of relief as he tentatively sticks his head into the classroom and peeks from behind the door. jackson laughs mischievously and shoves him in.
jinyoung tumbles headfirst into the classroom without knocking, jackson falling in after him. they stumble to catch their balance, looking up to see almost ten pairs of eyes watching them inquisitively, most bespectacled, all second and third years.
jinyoung chokes out an incoherent squeak. jackson hurriedly translates, "hi! is this the astronomy club?"
a boy steps out from behind, and jackson recognizes him as jinyoung's jaebum. his eyes are amused as he takes off his nerdy chic glasses. "yes. i'm jaebum, the vice-president. can i help you?"
jinyoung opens his mouth eagerly, and jackson is afraid he's going to say something stupid and irrevocable, but thankfully jinyoung is shrewder than he expected.
"hi," he says, voice shy but remarkably composed. "nice to meet you. i'm jinyoung and he's jackson. we're first years and we love astronomy. can we join the club?"
jaebum dons his glasses again and squints skeptically at them, and jackson helpfully nods convincingly and adds, "absolutely adore it," laying it on thick.
"well, we don't have any first-year members yet..." jaebum hesitates, and jinyoung's breath catches audibly as he gazes at jaebum with hopeful puppydog eyes.
jaebum looks startled by the intensity of his gaze, and relents, flustered, "... but i guess it's okay, since you guys are so passionate."
jinyoung squeezes jackson's hand in a bone-crushing grip. "thanks, hyung!" the korean words seem to slip out of his mouth unconsciously, and he looks equally startled by them as jaebum does.
"are you korean?" he says, eyes no longer roving absently between them but honing in on jinyoung and focusing seriously.
jinyoung nods bashfully, and blurts out, "we were from the same junior high too."
jaebum's eyes widen, and jackson senses that jinyoung is slipping into creepy stalker territory. dutifully as best friend, he quickly launches into damage control, elbowing jinyoung hard in warning and blurting out the first question that comes to mind loudly. "who's the president?"
jinyoung lets out a muffled oof, and jaebum looks confused by the sudden change of subject but reluctantly tears his attention away from jinyoung to answer jackson politely. "he's... not in."
another senior in the group gathered around the meeting table interjects, "he hasn't been by for awhile. nowadays, jaebum's practically the one in charge around here."
jaebum laughs and shakes his head modestly. "mark's just busy. and he's done a lot for the club. after all, he was the one who created it."
the other senior grudgingly agrees. "we're only keeping him as president because he knows the most about stars," he admits.
mark? jackson thinks. the name strikes him because it's english, in contrast to the chinese names that most students go by. too bad he was on a hiatus, or jackson might have found someone to practice his english with.
jinyoung is practically skipping as they walk back down the corridor towards their classroom, face flushed with excitement. jackson laughs and forgets his reservations about joining a boring geek club. as today's activities were ending soon, jaebum had told them to report the next week with their filled-in application forms so he could officially register them as members.
they are nearing the classroom when jackson suddenly yelps in horror. jinyoung spins around, alarmed. "what?"
"i'm late for detention!" jackson screeches, dashing into class to grab his bag and blowing past a gobsmacked jinyoung. "don't wait for me! i'll text you later."
jackson sprints all the way down the stairs to the second floor, wheezing to a halt in front of the classroom. the teacher looks out of the door and frowns at him disapprovingly, glancing at her watch, and jackson bows apologetically as he shuffles in with a sheepish smile.
after the teacher accepts his slip, jackson turns to face the classroom. the first thing he sees is the same boy from yesterday, sitting in the same seat in the otherwise empty classroom. the only thing that's different is his hair. and it is very different.
while his hair had been a copperish brown yesterday, dark enough to pass as natural, today it is obviously not, bleached into an ashy silver grey and teased into spiky tufts. jackson gapes at it unabashedly as the boy drops his gaze, colour rising in his cheeks at jackson's intense scrutiny.
jackson realizes he's staring and finally tears his eyes away, moving down the aisle towards his usual seat. as he passes the boy, their arms graze briefly, making the hair on jackson's arm stand. the boy's elbow is scraped, his skin warm. jackson surmises that the change in hair colour is probably the reason why he's in detention again, and he wonders why the boy would do such a thing on purpose, knowing that it was against the rules.
the sun sinks slowly into the horizon as the afternoon wears on. at the front of the classroom, the teacher is absorbed in grading papers. the ceiling fan drones lazily above them, making jackson's worksheets flutter weakly and drawing his gaze up to the back of the boy's head again, looking completely different from yesterday with just a change of hair colour. the 4pm sunlight streaming through the dusty windows brings out platinum highlights in his coarse smoke-grey strands, like spun gossamer threads of white silver.
today, surprisingly, he's not plugged into his headphones but instead doodling on a piece of notebook paper, the curve of his shoulders looking as bored as jackson feels. there's something about it that spikes jackson's bravery, making him tear out a page from his own notebook on impulse and scrawl on it, i like your hair.
jackson squints one eye shut as he takes aim, shooting the crumpled ball of paper at the back of the boy's head. it lands almost on target, tumbling down his shoulder to roll to a stop on the floor beside his chair.
the boy turns around slowly, frowning. jackson nods encouragingly at the ball of paper, offering a friendly smile to show that he means no harm, and he looks bewildered as he bends to pick it up and unfolds it hesitantly.
jackson waits with bated breath as the boy reads the note. he stares at it for an endless moment, then places it on his desk. jackson thinks he's going to ignore it, but then he sees the boy fishing a pen from his pencilcase and lowering his head to write something on the note.
jackson hurriedly casts his gaze down as the boy turns. he feels the gentle thud of something landing with remarkably accurate aim on his table, and tries not to unravel it too eagerly.
the boy has scribbled a single word in blue pen below jackson's: thanks. but the brevity and simplicity of his reply is softened by the cute smiley face at the end, and jackson looks up, his breath catching. although he can't see the boy's face, he imagines that he's biting his lip to hide it as he smiles foolishly at the whiteboard, much like the way jackson is.
maybe he wasn't as bad a guy as jackson had first thought, he thinks as he ambles towards the bus stop, hearing the boy's footfalls trailing a distance behind him, their rhythm oddly calming and not bothering him as much as they did the first time.
the bus stop is empty again, all the students having long left at dismissal. jackson swings his legs and studies his sneakers as he waits for the bus. he is surprised when the bench creaks and the boy settles down beside him, an arm's length away but undeniably much closer than yesterday.
jackson's heart leaps oddly, even though the boy just stares blankly into the distance and doesn't say anything. he really does seem kind of cool, especially with that platinum blond hair. and he has the added distinction of being a senior, giving him an air of unattainable maturity.
because the volume of his music isn't as loud as yesterday, jackson doesn't notice that his earbuds are hanging from his ears until he says, "did they ask you to dye it back?"
surprisingly though, the boy doesn't look bothered but unplugs his earphones easily and replies, seeming to have heard with no problem. "yeah," he shrugs with a resigned half-smile. his voice is unexpectedly deep and low, catching jackson off guard for a moment.
"what a waste!" he exclaims indignantly. the boy looks surprised by his outburst.
jackson blushes but says, "no, seriously. that sucks. you should take a selca to commemorate it, at least."
"sel...ca?" the boy repeats hesitantly.
jackson can't resist laughing out loud, and the boy looks mildly miffed, like he thinks jackson is laughing at him. jackson hurriedly clarifies, "it's just that i'm not surprised. you don't look like... a selca kind of person."
"i know what it is," the boy says testily. "i'm just not into taking them."
jackson takes in the sunshine splashed over his artistically tousled hair, making it gleam almost flaxen, the row of matching silver piercings glittering from his ear. it seems ironical for such an unnarcissistic person to be blessed with such photogenic looks.
jackson doesn't reply, just reaches out for the ipod in the boy's hand. the boy shrinks away reflexively, startled, but jackson smiles and pries it gently from his grasp. "can i borrow this a second? i think there's a camera function."
he fiddles with the touch pad, finally locating the camera button which makes the screen open into a mirror which suddenly reflects both of them. jackson's other hand instinctively goes up to fix his hair as he raises the ipod over their heads, tilting it to find the best angle.
the boy's face hovers in the background, their differing distances to the camera making it about half the size of jackson's. jackson huffs. is he deliberately trying to make jackson look ugly? his face is already big enough as it is. but too lazy to bother to coax the boy to the front and guessing that probably no one else will ever see it anyway, he snaps a careless picture. it comes out remarkably clear and well-lit, the filter of natural sunlight flattering their skin.
jackson passes the ipod back to the boy, who squints at the photo with unreadable eyes. he eventually closes it and pockets the ipod again without comment. at this moment, the boy's bus arrives. he gets to his feet, not looking back until jackson pipes up, almost drowned out by the rumbling of the engine: "what's your name?"
the boy stops outside the bus doors, turning back for a brief second. a whisper of a smile plays at the edges of his lips. "yi-en," he replies softly, so softly jackson doesn't know if he caught the two chinese syllables correctly.
having answered, he expects the boy -- yi-en -- to board the bus. instead, he lingers, startling jackson with his first expression of any interest or initiative ever since they met. "what's yours?"
jackson opens his mouth, about to reply with his english name, but inexplicably, what comes out is his chinese one. he prefers to go by his english name most of the time because he thinks his chinese one is less pretty and difficult to pronounce, but when he says, "jia-er," yi-en's eyes light up.
he mouths jackson's name silently, as if commiting it to memory, as he finally turns to climb aboard the bus, the doors closing behind him. jackson watches as he meanders down the aisle, looking for an empty seat and sliding into one near the back, by the window. as the bus zooms away, jackson catches his eyes for a heartbeat and it's probably his imagination but he thinks he sees yi-en smile uncertainly.
jackson doesn't see yi-en after that day, since he doesn't go to detention and he doesn't expect that yi-en goes daily either. he doesn't seem to be as much a delinquent as jackson first thought. once, a week later, jackson catches a glimpse of him outside the second-years' classrooms one storey down, and almost doesn't recognize him because his hair is now a jet-black that is even darker than his original dark chocolate shade. it's unstyled and falling over his eyes, his shirttails falling out as he sidles down the corridor and out of jackson's line of vision, alone, his head down.
jackson wonders if he has any friends and is surprised by the pang of pity he feels. then jinyoung nudges him to get his attention, and jackson is distracted.
sometimes when he's walking from the bus stop to school or to the bus stop after school, he hears a familiar rattling of bicycle chains and turns to see yi-en breezing past him on his bike, a blur of speed and windswept hair, too quickly for jackson to even call a greeting. he vaguely wonders why yi-en had taken the bus those two days after detention even though he had a bike, but it only crosses his mind for a second.
they've gotten into the routine of attending club activities every tuesday afternoon. after the bell rings, jackson and jinyoung will troop to the astronomy club without even having lunch first because jinyoung is too excited and doesn't want to miss a single possible minute of seeing jaebum. instead, he usually fixes a huge bento box of bulgogi sandwiches or kimbap which, on the pretext of sharing with the other members, he tremblingly offers jaebum one. jaebum will look up from whatever intricate model of the galaxy he's assembling, peeling off his glasses, small eyes disappearing into a smile of surprised pleasure as he accepts the food gratefully.
to his surprise, jackson is scouted to join the fencing club too by mino, a senior who had been in their junior high fencing team with him. it seems like he's getting roped unwittingly into all these different clubs and activities without himself planning to, but jackson can't say no to his friends and at least he has more interest in fencing than astronomy.
one tuesday, towards the end of their meeting, jaebum looks thrilled as he informs them proudly that there will be a predicted meteor shower a few nights later and that their club has been granted permission to camp at school overnight to watch and observe it.
jinyoung's eyes widen as he squeezes jackson's hand. jackson can read the disbelieving thoughts in his eyes like a book. an entire night with jaebum? jackson groans. he was planning on worming his way out of it but guesses that jinyoung will not allow it.
"come on!" jinyoung wheedles as they leave the school together. "it'll be fun! how can you miss such a beautiful thing?"
jackson snorts. "would this beautiful thing you're referring to be happen to be called im jaebum?" he snarks, voice heavy with sarcasm.
jinyoung blushes furiously and jackson can't bear to continue teasing him.
on friday night, they assemble in the deserted school courtyard, dressed in comfortable tracksuits with overnight duffels and sleeping bags. the silvery moonlight illuminates the granite compound and a faint night breeze chills their skin. jaebum's sports jacket is zipped dorkily all the way up to his chin, but jinyoung swoons, "he's so hot," and jackson thinks he's seriously screwed.
when all the members have assembled in the darkened courtyard and jaebum has taken attendance, he still doesn't make a move to go, glancing distractedly at his watch.
"are you waiting for someone?" jinyoung pipes up, confused, and jaebum is opening his mouth to answer when jackson hears footsteps and turns to see a familiar but unexpected face. yi-en rushing across the courtyard, skidding to a halt before them and bending to catch his breath with his hands on his knees.
jackson just blinks for a moment, unable to reconcile yi-en appearing at this time, on this night, at the astronomy club. it's the very last place he had expected to see him again. but one of the seniors shout in surprise, "president, you came!" and jaebum smiles and explains to them, "i asked mark to come help out today."
"mark?" jackson blurts out before he can catch himself. "isn't your name yi-en?"
yi-en swivels around, eyes widening when he finally notices jackson standing in the shadows at the corner of the group. however, he doesn't seem as surprised to see jackson as jackson feels to see him, and he has an odd feeling that maybe mark already knew he was in the club. after all, he was the mysterious president.
mark shoots him a small, nervous smile of acknowledgement, and answers jackson's question which he belatedly realizes sounds a little accusatory. "it's my english name."
"yi-en," jinyoung repeats, sounding out the syllables in his korean-accented chinese, and jaebum and mark chorus at the same time, "he doesn't like being called that," and "just call me mark."
jinyoung's mouth falls open as he absorbs this. a slow, impish grin spreads over his face. "oh, i see. so jackson is the only one who's allowed to call you that?"
abruptly, jackson realizes how it sounds and mark seems to also at the same moment, a tinge of red dusting across his cheekbones, visible even in the dark. "it's not like that. i --"
"relax," jinyoung laughs loudly. "just kidding, mark."
mark looks relieved, and quickly launches into soft-spoken but authoritative instructions to the group members, who follow them obediently. he is obviously equally respected by the club as jaebum.
with flashlights and blankets to spread on the grass and keep warm, they climb up the small hill. in the dark, jinyoung trips over a tree root, and jaebum catches him before he loses his balance. "careful there," he says, voice kind, and stays behind jinyoung quietly for the rest of the journey. if only mark were as caring a senior -- but no, he's taking absolutely no notice of them, lingering at the very back of the group and conversing in low voices with a few senior members.
however, later, when jackson has spread out his blanket and lay down with his head pillowed by his hands on the grassy slope, a distance from the rest of the group, mark approaches. he doesn't say anything but simply settles his own blanket beside jackson, lying back with a soft sigh. jackson stares up at the swirling patterns of the stars, unable to see mark but only hear the even push-pull of his breathing beside him.
"they're all connected, you know," mark says softly, and jackson finally turns to look at him. the chiseled lines of his profile are silhouetted by the iridescent starlight, and his eyes gleam like coal. jackson looks at him questioningly, and mark elaborates, "the tides and the moon and the stars." he tells jackson about the ebb and flow of the tides, the cycles of the moon and the aligning of the stars, his voice mellow and soothing as the words wash over jackson. all of a sudden, a streak of light flashes across the canvas of the sky, so quickly jackson would've missed it if he blinked.
"is that a shooting star?" he gasps, and can hear similar exclamations of delight from the nearby cluster of members.
mark smiles and nods, and jackson can hardly contain his excitement as he keeps his eyes peeled, not wanting to miss the next one. "it's started," mark states, his calm voice unable to hide his own exhilaration.
they wait with bated breath, in a silence of infinite depth. after what seems like a lifetime or a heartbeat, another star arcs gracefully across the midnight sky, vapor trailing behind it like a tail before fizzling into the darkness. "it's beautiful," jackson breathes, inexplicably feeling the prickle of tears.
"exquisite," mark agrees quietly.
impossibly, it gets even better as the number of stars start increasing till jackson can no longer keep count of them, exploding into brilliance simultaneously like fireworks bursting through the sky. jackson watches open-mouthed the ocean of stars falling at their feet, raining down on them like a waterfall.
"make a wish," mark suggests, and jackson instinctively closes his eyes. when he opens them, mark has torn his eyes away from the sky and is looking at jackson, like it's the first time he's seeing him. when jackson notices, he immediately shifts his gaze away.
they fall silent until the last of the magnificent spectacle fades, and then stand up to join the rest of the members discussing the panorama they've just seen in thrilled voices as they descend the hill.
the next morning, jackson wakes up, groggy and disoriented to jinyoung's impatient nagging. he crawls out of his sleeping bag and sees that most of the others' are already empty in the rows they are arranged in in the auditorium. jackson sniffles and sneezes, coughing a little. jinyoung looks concerned. "did you catch a cold?"
"mmm," jackson grunts grouchily, struggling to his feet and moving to rummage in his bag for his toothbrush and toothpaste. he assures jinyoung that he can go for breakfast first and he'll join him later, and makes his way alone to the row of sinks outside the boys' toilet. as it's saturday, the school is deserted, the morning breeze pleasantly chilly but making jackson shiver slightly and his nose run.
he clumsily brushes his teeth and uses his cupped palms to scoop water from the faucet to rinse his mouth. when he's wiping his running nose on the sleeve of his shirt, wishing he had some tissues, mark steps out of the toilet, morning dew glimmering on his freshly-washed face, clad in a sports jacket with the school's logo emblazoned across the front.
a smile flickers across his eyes when he sees jackson, but it is quickly replaced by a frown as he walks closer and takes him in. "why is your face so red?" he says brusquely, hand coming up without warning to rest on jackson's forehead. "are you sick?" he demands.
jackson mumbles something incoherent, too shocked and dizzy to reply properly. mark curses under his breath and unzips his jacket, stripping it off. he's only wearing a threadbare gym shirt underneath but doesn't seem to notice the cold, draping the jacket clumsily over jackson's shoulders and tucking the collar tightly around his neck. "you'd better go home first," he says authoritatively. "i'll let jaebum know," and jackson abruptly realizes the reason for his actions. of course, it's not because he cares. it's simply because he's the president and it's his duty. jackson smiles bitterly at his foolishness.
"i'll return your jacket," is all he says as he turns and walks away without a backward glance, hearing mark's exhalation of annoyance behind him but no footsteps following after him or voice calling him back.
jackson washes mark's jacket and folds it up neatly, tucking it into his bag the next tuesday as he trudges with jinyoung on the now familiar route towards club. jinyoung makes no secret of the fact that tuesday is his favourite day of the week, for obvious reasons, but jackson doesn't reveal that it has become something he looks forward to as well. he never expected to be interested in astronomy, but then he thinks of mark's sleepy voice during the meteor shower, prickling on the edges of the drizzling stars, and feels an undeniable surge of intrigue.
when they get to club, jackson's heart skips a beat of relief to see mark sitting on a desk in a shaft of afternoon sun, swinging his legs as he reads the latest volume of one piece, dust motes dancing in the light from the window streaming in around him. the rest of the members are gathered around the desk in low discussion and jaebum is working on his model at the back of the class, looking utterly engrossed.
jackson had wondered if mark would be attending future club sessions or if he had only come to help for the special activity. in the case of the latter, he'd have to seek mark out at his classroom and that might've been awkward. jackson fishes the jacket out of his bag and approaches mark, who looks up, his eyes unreadable as they take jackson in.
"hi," jackson says tentatively, and they soften a little, the edges of his lips curling up infinitesimally in a half-smile. "hey."
jackson extends the jacket. "thanks," he says simply, and mark looks surprised, like he'd forgotten he'd lent it to him, but takes it stoically and immediately puts it on, pushing his hands through the sleeves comfortably. he returns to his manga, effectively dismissing jackson.
"yi-en," jackson blurts out, and mark looks up, startled as his eyes flicker around the classroom to see if anyone else has heard. everyone is absorbed in their own activities and mark seems to exhale a small sigh of relief as he looks back at jackson again. "what is it?" mark asks politely, and jackson doesn't know what to say. i just wanted to say your name doesn't seem very appropriate right now. he doesn't know how to explain his sudden urge to breach the distance that seems to have formed between them since the first two days at detention, the insurmountable chasm of one year.
jackson had thought they were friends, at least. maybe he was thinking too much. "nothing," he says shortly, turning to move away. mark doesn't return to his manga, staring at jackson's back with unsettled eyes like jackson has done something he doesn't understand. jackson tries not to notice his gaze as he sits down beside jinyoung at the back of the classroom and starts on his homework.
and so every tuesday goes by much the same way -- jackson walks into club with jinyoung, no longer surprised but still inexplicably lighter to see mark, sitting unobtrusively by the window or joking with jaebum, helping him add the finishing touches to his rapidly expanding model. it's the largest-scale and most intricate model of the galaxy jaebum has ever tried to build, jinyoung informs him proudly. and it looks undeniably impressive, its slow but steady growth reflecting the way the four of them are drawing closer to each other -- jackson and jinyoung, jinyoung and jaebum, jackson and mark.
the days trickle by like droplets of water dripping from a faucet not turned off properly, each drop reverberating a wave of ripples in jackson's heart as it plops onto the surface of the collecting puddle. jackson gradually gets used to high school, much because he has managed to find a space for himself, a group of friends in which he fits in. as promised, jinyoung spends an hour a week after school giving korean lessons to an increasingly expanding group of classmates, including jackson, and jackson regularly attends practice at the fencing club every thursday. but there is a special place in his heart reserved for tuesday afternoons at the astronomy club with jinyoung and mark and jaebum and the other friendly members, lazy and languid and where jackson feels most at ease.
when the makeshift korean classes grow too big for jinyoung to handle alone, he approaches jaebum beseechingly to ask if he could consider helping him out. jaebum agrees readily, his signature eye smile unflagging and delivers true to his word. he appears at their classroom the next monday, drawing awed stares from the boys and hushed giggles from the girls, proceeding to launch into a remarkable lesson as jinyoung's assistant teacher.
"he totally likes you," jackson pronounces as they pack up later after dismissing the students and sending jaebum off with profuse thanks.
"no way!" jinyoung protests vehemently. "he's just being helpful. you know he can't say no to anybody."
jackson purses his lips. "fine. i guess we'll just have to test him then."
"t-test him?" jinyoung squeaks doubtfully.
the next day, jackson turns up to club alone. jaebum looks up, face lighting up when he sees him in the doorway, and peers expectantly behind him, smile slipping a little when no one appears.
"where's jinyoung?" he demands anxiously, and jackson tries not to smile. the plan is going well.
"well?" jaebum snaps impatiently. "is he ill?" mark looks up in concern.
jackson pauses, keeping him waiting deliberately and finally says casually, "nah. he's not coming today because he went out with bomi after school."
"... bomi?" jaebum repeats, looking stunned. "who's that?"
"only the hottest girl in our class," jackson replies offhandedly. he neglects to mention that it's true that bomi and jinyoung went out together, but only as friends, and that she's friends with jackson too. jaebum's face crumples.
"oh. i see," he says, struggling to keep his cheerful, gentle smile in place, even though it doesn't reach his eyes. park jinyoung, you lucky ass, jackson thinks, wishing he could take a photograph of jaebum at this very moment, his eyes lost and bewildered as he mechanically presides over the club meeting, losing concentration more than once and unconsciously snapping at one of the members and proceeding to apologize profusely. it's beyond the shadow of a doubt: jaebum likes jinyoung. impossible as it was, long-unrequited as it was, jinyoung's dream has finally come true.
jackson reports the proceedings to jinyoung the next day, who listens with disbelieving hope and barely concealed glee. "i can't believe it," he keeps murmuring. "you must be pulling my leg."
jackson eventually huffs in exasperation. "fine, you can see it for yourself if you don't believe me."
jaebum turns up the next monday for korean class and is a professional and efficient teacher as usual, but he leaves immediately after that with a perfunctory excuse mumbled in jackson's ear that he has to go somewhere. by tuesday, it's getting obvious that jaebum is avoiding jinyoung.
jackson and jinyoung huddle at the back of the class with mark beside jaebum's galaxy model, which he hasn't touched today. jaebum is sitting at the teacher's desk, importantly firing off instructions to the nodding members who scribble his words down as if they're gospel. jinyoung had barely been able to get a word in edgewise since they arrived and looks dangerously close to tears. jackson feels a pang of sympathy and sneaks a glance at the reassuring mound of mark's slightly slouched shoulders as he copies jaebum's homework. he wonders if mark knows about jinyoung's crush on jaebum, or if he would care even if he did. mark doesn't seem like a person who sweats over things like that and jackson envies his easygoing carelessness.
everything is going wrong and jackson hopes that he hasn't just destroyed jinyoung and jaebum's tenously developing relationship with his brilliant idea. at the end of club, they linger until everyone has left except mark, who is still packing his books slowly into his backpack behind them. jaebum is still sitting at the teacher's desk, unsmiling eyes looking forbidding as he scrawls and flips through some documents.
jinyoung approaches him apprehensively. "hyung..." he starts, but jaebum replies him in chinese instead. after they had realized their shared ethnicity, they usually communicated in rapidfire korean that jackson struggled to keep up with but is increasingly able to discern bits and pieces. but today, jaebum says in fluent chinese, "if you're going to skip club activities as and when you like, you shouldn't have joined in the first place."
his voice is severe and jackson can see jinyoung flinch all the way across the room. reflexively, his defensive instincts kick in and he starts towards them but feels a hand close around his elbow, holding him back. jackson whirls around in surprise to see mark with a look on his face that stops jackson in his tracks.
"i'm disappointed in you," jaebum continues, arranging his papers and getting to his feet before brushing past jinyoung and leaving the classroom without a backward glance.
the room descends into an oppressive silence. the crushed look of dismay on jinyoung's face hurts jackson physically. how had things spiralled out of control so fast? jackson had thought he had it all figured out. behind him, mark has fallen silent too, even the rustling of his papers ceasing. jinyoung doesn't meet either of their eyes as he snatches up his bag, face burning and pivots on his heel, fleeing out of the classroom before jackson can say anything.
jackson clenches his jaw and glares after jaebum, hands reaching for his own bag and feet already starting after him. but a gentle but firm pressure on his arm stops him cold. thoughts racing, jackson turns frowning to see mark's entreating eyes. "my bicycle broke down. can you help me take a look at it?"
jackson blinks a few times, momentarily confused. had mark not just witnessed the scene? anyway, what business was it of jackson's that his bike was broken down? it wasn't like jackson was the resident mechanic, or something.
jackson opens his mouth to say so, but the words die on his tongue at mark's level gaze. maybe mark does know, and is trying to tell jackson in his own way not to get involved. and jackson did owe him a favour. he sighs resignedly and follows mark out of the classroom as he turns off the lights and fan behind them.
mark leads the way to the empty parking lot behind the school building, where a few beat-up bicycles, including his, are chained to a rack. he unlocks the chain with a key from his pocket and bends down beside it, brows creasing as he messes with the gear of the pedals. jackson crouches down beside him and gently elbows him out of the way. "i'll do it," he says gruffly, and mark obediently watches as jackson clumsily attempts to fix the loose bicycle chains.
finally, hands stained with grease and grime, he stands up and says, "try it." mark swings a leg over the bicycle and straddles the seat, cycling a few feet and gingerly testing out the brake.
"it works," he cries, face lighting up into a radiant smile jackson hasn't seen before that makes his heart swell with pride that he had managed to please mark. mark cycles in a wobbly circle around the quadrangle, untucked shirttails looking like wings as they flutter in the breeze. jackson feels a sudden twinge of loneliness at mark looking for all the world as if he's about to take flight without a backward glance, leaving jackson behind.
"hey!" he calls, as mark passes him the last time, brusquely swinging his bag off his shoulder and into the basket between mark's handlebars, and his legs over the back of the bicycle behind mark. he narrowly misses impaling his crotch on the frame but his feet find the jutting spokes of the back wheels in time, grabbing tightly on to mark's shoulders for balance. mark had impressively managed to maintain his balance throughout jackson's sudden and unexpected embarkation, but now he swerves the bike precariously, making jackson yelp and tighten his grip. thankfully, he manages to steady them after a few seconds and then they are rolling down the road at a brisk and breathless pace, bumping and jolting over potholes and the gritty asphalt.
"why did you get on?" mark growls at him, twisting his head up to look back at jackson when they halt at a traffic light. his face is flushed, probably with irritation. it spreads down to his neck, under jackson's fingers and he swallows.
"t-take me home to thank me for repairing your bike," he demands bossily.
+ this is a wip from january that i never got to completing... i don't have concrete plans about how to continue the next chapters yet so suggestions/ideas are welcome :D
+ if anybody missed out my notice, i have reposted my old fics at gotchickoldfics :)
part 2