i just woke from a nightmare in which the attacker was my own sweat-sticky t-shirt.  the black morning makes me think of old age alone.  when i lived with Brendan I was, uncharacteristically, a glutton for sleep.  I would roll gingerly out of bed at 9, 9:30, heavy with having swallowed the morning.  At home I'm up at 7.  My mom wakes up at 6 in the ( Read more... )

other pieces ( Read more... )

I think I took the safest, most lazy road.  Sitting in my old room, eating eggplant my mother has gathered for me in the fields, I feel disdain for my full stomach and my yoga-sore back.  Princeton is a cream-colored bathrobe with matching slippers.  

I get a taste of a radical change coming and my mind rushes forward toward a new world.  I see all the old values drop away in one skin.  In an instant we live in a life that is unrecognizable ( Read more... )

We decided, with a great flourish of impulsiveness, to travel to Switzerland and Ireland. I immediately felt less trapped about my year in Princeton.  Boyfriend Brendan wanted to go for rock climbing and to interview at a school.  I wanted to escape into the mountains.

Pictures!

my favorite moments are when glances hit and bounce like pool balls.  
 the eyeballs have been polished smooth; you wrestle your glance back in charged instances. 

what am i doing now ( Read more... )

The difference is that I like people close and you like them in the abstract.  No real human being is interesting in broad strokes and general principles.  Our averages are greys and all our words together are a white noise ( Read more... )

He came back from the kitchen and lay down, pulling the covers over both our heads. The rye on his warm breath filled the dark space between our faces.

i cried through exit 44-46 in connecticut. everything you see through tears is smeared across the retina and sticks to the eyelashes with significance. i had to blink away the yellow M rest areas. with a diversity of chain eateries i could have collected letters and spelled out a real word. instead, because everything in CT is a Macdonals, i ( Read more... )