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Shit, I guess it's about time I post something huh? I haven't been online much or at all in about two months because work has been really hectic and the last thing I've wanted to do after working endless hours unfucking other people's computers at work is get on my own computer at home. I'm on vacation this week though so I figgered I was about due ( Read more... )

Saturday I had my second mandolin lesson and I told my teacher Randy about the adventures I'd had the week before with strings breaking, bridge popping out etc and he took my mandolin and checked it out and was really impressed and told me I did a really good job of putting it all together. I guess the bridge adjustment is kind of complicated and ( Read more... )

God needed to choose a new right hand man. Arnold, Stallone and Chuck Norris applied for the job. When God asked Arnold "Why should you be my right hand man?" Arnold replied "Because I was Governor and I did all thses great things." When God asked Stallone, Stallone replied, "Because I made all those movies and did so many great things." When God ( Read more... )

Considering that I shave my head bald and that my lover is about 1100 miles away at the moment ( Read more... )

A poem by the Bard of Scotland himself, Robert Burns:

A Red, Red RoseO, my Luve's like a red, red rose ( Read more... )

This is pretty funny, because I just made an appointment for a physical not 15 minutes ago and then I check my e-mail and here this is.

Dear Robert ( Read more... )

Chuck Norris Approved:

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I couldn't sleep for the life of me last night and I kept waking up like every 10-15 fucking minutes all night long and I feel like total dogshit today. I just want to go curl up and pass out somewhere. Work's bugging the shit out of me today too. The stores are extra busy with everyone out shopping for turkey day so lots more shit is breaking down ( Read more... )

Dear Robert,
Here is your AstroSlam
for Friday, November 16:

This would be a good time to follow through on that knuckle-headed crack-pot idea that's been knocking around your head for years -- the goofier the better. Let them point and laugh -- you know what's up.