so lets see, in the past month, ive done things im not proud of. ive taken refuge in things i once shunned away. ive, for one reason or another, left town without telling a soul where i was going or if i was coming back. ive questioned everything about myself. who i was, who i am, who i want to be, what i want to do, is it really worth all this, ( Read more... )

tuesday night was by far the scariest night of my life.

after an incredible show tonight with incredible bands, ive realized something that i kinda knew all along. i am an entertainer/musician. nothing brings me more happiness in life than entertaining people and playing music. put them together, bam, there ya go! now, make a career out of it. ok, if i have to. things have changed a litte bit as far as ( Read more... )

things ive learned in 18 years ( Read more... )

so, im done with jordan. i dont want her anymore. you know that funny feeling you get when you really want someone and they smile at you and your stomach starts to knot. well, sunday we worked together and she looked right at me and smiled and i felt nothing. nothing tingled, nothing felt funny. i guess that means i am done with her. anyway, ive ( Read more... )

ill never know why i up and walked away from someone who truly cared about me like no other and i dont think anyone will ever care for me the same way she did. the truth is, i didnt see this at the time, because i didnt want to see it. i wanted more. i wanted something different. i wanted something better. there wasnt anything better. that was ( Read more... )

long nights and i stay awake, pictures of you. fuck, we were so young back then. was it real? were we really meant to believe that we really felt the same way about each other back then? we were young. what did we know? they call it a crush for a reason. worlds apart. fuck. what did we know? for all we know, we could have been kidding ourselves and ( Read more... )

damn. i think i may be interested in someone new. maybe...just maybe...this will work. she doesnt know this yet but shes alot like me. so, maybe well see where this one heads if anywhere.

so we start moving this week. mixed feelings about that one. i went to dads earlier. its already starting to look vacant. i think im going to head to target later to get some food. today is drakes birthday. i guess im done.

lungs blackened, liver turned to shit, and my digestive system pissed off as all hell at me and ill call it a good night to have smoked, drank and binged only to take a huge shit later. youll die anyway, why not have fun on the way down, right? with that said, i think ill start with the first one.