im alive..o well, guess ill haveta try a lil harder next time, lol j/k, thnx scott, i guess...mara 2 :), life seems to be returning to normal around here...if it were ever normal to begin with, i hate the pavilion, i forgot how bad it was when i was younger, and it just gets worse as an adult,i missed all my friends and i realised alot of things in ( Read more... )

well, im tarting my new jobin about an hour and 45 minutes, wish me luck...im really quite nervous, but i think ill do fine, i mean its a miracle i even woke up this early on my own, well anyways i haveta be going now, bye people

feeling depressed everyday, i want it all to just end, for it all just to go away, suicide seems the answer, but to what gain? all i do is leave the people that i care about behind, and for them to be depressed about my death,creating a sort of cycle, ive tried just to let it all go, to care about things and people, to give some sort of meaning to ( Read more... )

what a sick world we live in today, to think that people care more about money than love, more about respect than love more about possesions than love, more about friendships that wont even exist in a few years, then they care about love, love endures a friend who now isnt a friend anymore told me once, my favorite qoute has got to be life is just ( Read more... )

to much shit on my mind.... life, friends, everything, i just threw uppure blood from my ulcer from te amount of stress/depression that ive been haveing over the last few days, how to say youre sorry to someone when sorry just isnt a strong enough word and theres no word to say what needs to be said...my life has gone to shit in less thn 48 hours ( Read more... )

for those of u who dont know i tried to have myself commited lst night, but couldnt because i didnt have the right insurance company... america......heh..... i told my mom everything last night, bout the drugs, the lies, the not being a virgin thing.... didnt tell her how many..... didnt wanna break her heart completely, i know ive hurt alot of ( Read more... )

i always say the wrong thing...or the most fucked up thing i could ever possibly say at the exact perfectly wrong time in my life or someone elses...for those of u who havent noticed...ive been haveing some serious problems lately...my mental stablity.....or lack their of....has been dwindlig day by day, i feel utterly useless....without school, ( Read more... )

for those of u who dont know i was throw out of college on monday..i dont think theres anything i can do about it either, so that 2 years and 20,000 thousand dollars down the drain....needless to say my mom islivi, but she keeps fluctuating in and out of her i understand/im a fucking worthless loser phases she so noturious for.....mentally im ( Read more... )

cant sleep, running a fever, throwing up, tummy hurts....damn my immune system an whoever started this chain of sicknesses....i need tylenol pm...lots of it.....a botle of jack daneiles would be ice as well....cant sleep..bore out of mind.....shoot me please....

ps my last entry was written at 2 am last night but just now posted since lj was down