it's been over a year since i last posted. anything. and my reasoning? i don't do anything. my life entirely consists of: anxiety, coffee, books, art. repeat. repeat. repeat ( Read more... )

i'm so jealous of birds. i always take the country highways home so i can be alone. i forget to look for my turns. i ignore posted speed limits. and if the beat of the song is just right- lines in the road cease to exist. then i look up to see a flock of birds on the pavement. my heart always flutters, a nervous spread. and at the last second every ( Read more... )

please hold tight to me.
when no one else is listening-
speak softly to me.

i'm tired of caring so much.
i'm tired of that scaring me.
i'm tired of being the one
that alawys holds everyone's
hair back.

hello world: i don't think
i've missed you?

ps.i hope you don't mind:
that i think about you in bed.

there is no love, there is no heaven, darling there's no god. then why do i feel so safe? i've done the whole introspection thing. it doesn't work. i'm not there. and that's ok. i'm always going to have those "boy, she talks too much." days followed by, "fuck, does that girl know what words even are." days. and i'm never going to understand ( Read more... )

lock me in a room with sharp pencils. please.
i wasn't the first artist. i don't trust anyone.
self-discovery hurts too much. i'm going to quit.
i wish i was poetic. i wish i played guitar in
secret. run run run run run run run run run run.

new lj makes me nervous.
i quit. again. sorry.

i want to forget the rules of intertia.

always remember: don't trust me. i've spent more time lying than telling the truth; i think i've confused honesty with vanity. and to be honest, i prefer the more shallow of the two. i wake up everyday not in the name of life, love, happiness.. no. i measure the world in beauty, sex: the jealousy, the pink cheeks, the whisper under sheets. tangible ( Read more... )

i know everyday this last week i've been saying is "the longest day of my life." but really, it is. twenty-four hours goes on forever. i need something to count down to. and i got nothing.

short days come find me. weekends that go by way too fast. find me. please?