So not only do you not want a temporary wife with no rights while you're visiting, you don't want your own whore/house cleaner to take home with you? Some people just don't have any priorities.
“I don't think I'd even be interested in a long term relationship with a woman who couldn't challenge me.”
It is tough but really worth it. Challenging each other in a relationship promotes growth and strength.
”I'm sure there's an appeal to having an obedient house slave who you can fuck and who can't talk back to you, but somehow that doesn't mesh with my idea of marriage.”
Iraqi slave driver meets LA divorce attourney.. Now there's culture shock!madprophetFebruary 14 2004, 20:50:09 UTC
So what I'd really love to see happen, is for this new wave of "liberation" from "tyranny" to include really good divorce settlements for all the wives like this guy's. Can you imagine the look on this guy's face? When his key doesn't work for the house that he never lets his wife leave? When she won't let him in? When he realizes that he'll have to take an extra job to make his child support payments?
I'm sorry, but I don't think there's a problem here. It bothers me too, the whole "wife and slave" thing in the middle east, but I think we're entirely overlooking the fact that it is their culture and that's just the way things are. I think if you want something different, you're entitled to that, but if that works for them, then we shouldn't be bashing the culture. I know, to us, it sounds horrible. But you've got to look at it from their eyes. You have to understand them before you can make a judgement.
Of course you're right. It's tyrannical to impose values on others just because they work for one's self. On the other hand, its inhumane to shrug off human rights violations when the oppressed aren't able to help themselves
( ... )
Things being traditional or "the way things are", is not a blanket excuse or a good reason. I'm sure the "wife and slave" thing works for the men in this culture, but I'm equally sure that there are a lot of women who are desperately unhappy with it. I don't believe that any human being should be treated like that.
I'm not a crusader, though, and I'm not foolish enough to think that I can change things here by being pissed off about the situation. I realize that this is the current order of things, but I do not have to accept it as good or reasonable.
Just had to put in my two cents and say that I entirely support your approach. Respect and perspective regarding others' cultures and customs is important, but Understanding and Tolerance can easily become an excuse for allowing intolerable things to be perpetuated.
One can't always change a situation, but the least that should be expected from a decent, intelligent person is to have a thought process and come to some conclusion about a situation within one's own head (even if that conclusion is sometimes "I don't know").
This bothered me all daywebcowgirlFebruary 15 2004, 13:17:39 UTC
But I'm glad you wrote it. People sat back and said nothing about slavery in America for a long time, too, and about segregation. You're right to challenge this man, just to point out that not everone in the world sees things the way he does. That's the first step on the path of getting him to examine his own actions ... to get him to realize that things aren't the same all over the world.
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It is tough but really worth it. Challenging each other in a relationship promotes growth and strength.
”I'm sure there's an appeal to having an obedient house slave who you can fuck and who can't talk back to you, but somehow that doesn't mesh with my idea of marriage.”
Never marry the help.
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Mmmm. Irony.
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Things being traditional or "the way things are", is not a blanket excuse or a good reason. I'm sure the "wife and slave" thing works for the men in this culture, but I'm equally sure that there are a lot of women who are desperately unhappy with it. I don't believe that any human being should be treated like that.
I'm not a crusader, though, and I'm not foolish enough to think that I can change things here by being pissed off about the situation. I realize that this is the current order of things, but I do not have to accept it as good or reasonable.
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One can't always change a situation, but the least that should be expected from a decent, intelligent person is to have a thought process and come to some conclusion about a situation within one's own head (even if that conclusion is sometimes "I don't know").
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