Well I could tell you the story of Reginald Dreadgun Superfast, if you really wanted me to. I could. I really could. I have it all in my head. Okay fine, I'll tell you. But only because of fish ( Read more... )

Craving the tearfull joy of the growing homes. Bring the girls back from the grounds, they fail to hammer the rinds. Real feelings read like a dreadfull head cold. Run from the casual reds and yellows of yeilding bratwurst like the hole left in my gears. Old pins on the wall grey with the dust of grown up deals in the dark corner of my heels. Dream ( Read more... )

He was a feral child. But that's a sad story. A more happy story is the of Fernando. Fernando was raised by circus freaks. When he was 8 he was taken from the freaks by Social Services, and given to a foster family. They enjoyed watching Fernando do his act from the circus. He would lay down on his belly and piss all over himself. The family showed ( Read more... )

So I bought a pig today. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with it yet. Maybe I'll peel it like a banana. Maybe I'll teach it simple algebra. Maybe I'll expose it to horribly lethal levels of Gamma radiation. The options are really endless when you have a pig. It was a pretty nice deal. Only $245 dollars and it weighs about 95 pounds. I could ( Read more... )

We got a gorilla for sale. Magilla gorilla. FUCKING BUY MY FUCKING GORILLA YOU FUCKING WORTHLESS LITTLE GIRL. YOU NEVER HAVE ANY FUCKING MONEY. YOUR A FUCKING SLUT, YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE MONEY, WHORE. FUCK YOU.

It has come to my attention that some of you think I am weird. I would like to assure you that I am not. I don't hate my mother like some weird people out there. Noodles to you. Noodles.

HohohoHO!! So there's a lot to talk about. Bradshaw. He's like a buzzsaw. I'm clevererer than you think. Thats really all there is to talk about. Frump on you. And a big sloppy vagina.

So there was this guy and he was all "Hey" and so I started taking off my clothes, but then I got shot. WITH LIGHTNING BULLETS. THEY SHOOT LIGHTNING OUT AT YOU AND YOU GET ALL LIGHTNINGED. I think I'll have some hot pockets. Yeah. NO! Yes.

I HATE PEOPLE! AND YOUR MOMMA!