this too will pass...

[heartbrokecoma]

I don't feel the need to explain myself. Lately I haven't been in the mood to discuss what is going on inside my heart and head. Would it even matter anyways? Would it change the way I feel? The way things are? So instead I choose to keep it inside and deal with things on my own time...my own way

Comments

[somethingnever]

"-I've lived my life for so long in attempts to make others happy, compfortable, smile, etc. Yet I've come to find that draining and onesided. Who's there to make me smile? Those who do instead bring tears."

Friends... your friends are there to make you smile. Like I've tried to do so many times. I bend over backwards for all my friends who are important to me. ...But do you ever sit and think that maybe you bring your friends tears as well.

[heartbrokecoma]

true. but i can't rely on them to do so all the time. nor can they expect me to all the time. you can't control the way i'm going to feel anymore then i can.

and if bending over backwards for your "friends" means not calling when you drive past even if we are fighting...then don't do me any favors and just stand straight

[somethingnever]

Oh I get it... I should be the first to make a move towards an apology when I did nothing wrong. I'm sorry Bec.. But when you say hurtful things to me and act like you don't want to be around me.. why would I then call you the next day just because I'm "driving though" Huntington? Which is all we did...drove through. Chris was driving.. We were all super tired.. we went to long beach for about 30 minutes and then drove home. It was there with my friends.. who enjoy my company.

I don't feel it's my responsibility to patch things up....I've been doing it for 15 years. Why don't you call me when you get off your little tangent and decide you have time for this friendship again. Sound good?

I miss you and love you dearly...you know that. This ridiculous situation really makes me sad, but this is such a repetitive thing with you. I'll just wait around on the back burner like I always do, until you decide to come around.

[heartbrokecoma]

i never said you had to make the first move. i just know for a fact that if i was taking the time to go to SD someone would be hurt as well that i didn't call...or text...shoot not as if we had to say anything significant.

Honestly i'm done with whatever this is that we are doing here. this may be our last goodbye. . .

[calm_my_heart]

becca. im really sorry you feel this way. im also sorry if ive ever done anything for you to feel this way. i dont know. i really miss you. and i miss the way things were. i love you<3

[heartbrokecoma]

oh honey! no no its not one peticular person. its a combo!! [and its getting better]...and yes i miss the way things were too...is there a way to get back there?? ♥