Well th year has started, started with more then one fight. Started with friends not going so well. If this is a mini map out of what the year is going to turn out to be then oh joy. I'm already through with this.

Feeling really lost, wanting to cry and scream at the same time, feeling crazy. Wanting to be loved....for once loved i know i have freidns but thats not what i'm talking about. I feel like no one can make me happy. And i can't make anyone happy. I feel left out and all that jazz. I'm just lost. I feel like no matter how loud i were to scream, no ( Read more... )

Family is supposed to be with you and help you for ever. Well my family, being my half brotehr and sister seem to be ingoreing. Amy wants nothign to do with me all of a sudden. And now, chris seems to feel the same, i feel..i don't knwo what i feel like, mostly like my heart was ripped out of my chest thwon on the ground and stomped on.I was their ( Read more... )

Hold up keeping stong. Just wanted to up date. and i'm done lol i'll update on sunday there will be alot to tlak about then :)

Alright guys. So i've tried so long to not be depressed. And it worked, until tonight, I feel like no matter how hard i work and how hard i try and no matter what i do, and don't do. I'll never be accepted by my peers. Its been 3 years of highschool. I'm nearly done. Yet, i'm not accepted by those that i wish to be. BUt they accept freshmen at the ( Read more... )

Boys suck boys suck boys suck boys suck, did i mention boys suck? Why why why do i let myself start to like a guy then let my walls down to get crushed? Apparently I'm not "the kinda girl guys like to date" or something like that.SO BOYS SUCK!

Well childern the word of the day is endless. Like I WOKRDED SO FUCKING MUCH, THE DAY FELT ENDLESS! lol. I Just got home. i've been out of the house sincd 7 am its now 10:42 and I JUST got home. I'm better then I was last night. i think i just had alot of emotions built up and i needed to cry for a min or two. And now its out of my system. And I'm ( Read more... )

Remember how I said I was over him? And that I was okay that we weren't together and thast it didn't hurt and it wouldn't work out? Well tonight all those feelings changed. I was moving back into my room ( FINALLY) and i found a letter he wrote me. I almost cried, then I called a friend a told her to trell me 3 good reasons why I shouoldn't like ( Read more... )

OK. Wow i have neglected this poor journal. Well heres how its going. Not too bad actually. Just a little stressed over some family issues. As you all know my aunt is suffering from cancer. Recently she became allergic to the Kemo the hospital has been giving her. Well she cam to visit for about two weeks and left this past saturday. I was under ( Read more... )

THIS FUCKING SUCKS! Everyone is leaving my side. IS this like friends get pissed off at you and never want to talk to you again month? You know how close i am to just changeing my cell # deleteing ALL the numbers from it, and tranfering to a differetn school to start over? {>THIS CLOSE<} I don't uinderstand why everything is going wrong! I don't ( Read more... )