Fic: All the Same-Part One (Remus/Sirius) R
Title: All the Same (Part One)
Rating: R
Characters: Remus Lupin, Sirius Black
Pairings: Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Summary: 'I don't mind; I don't care; as long as you're here.' Snapshots of Remus' and Sirius' lives together from their first year on.
Disclaimer: Anything you recognise does not belong to me.
Warnings: Male/Male relationship; language
Art Notes: Originally drawn by the_realduck for my request for rs_small_gifts, and they came out looking fantastic! Didn't she do an amazing job?! I immediately requested permission to add them to this story, and she graciously said yes! Original post can be seen here. Artist's post can be viewed here.
A/N: Thanks to XxXRegretXxX for the quick beta work.
I know, it’s a song-fic. I’m not particularly fond of them either, but sometimes an idea latches onto your mind and it just won’t let you loose, no matter how much you shake it. This is the result from the latch. I hope everyone enjoys!
All the Same
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1.
September 1, 1971
“Oi! So who are you, then?” a proper voice asked somewhat rudely.
Remus glanced up from his knees warily to meet a pair of silvery, grey eyes. His mouth worked silently for a few moments unable to form words. Apparently the boy attached to the odd eyes wasn’t one for patience.
“Are you going to answer or aren’t you?” he all but snapped, his lips twitching up into a small smirk.
“R-Remus,” he replied softly. “Remus Lupin.”
“Remus?” the boy asked, dropping down into the seat next to the smaller boy. He was shocked at how quickly the newcomer’s attitude changed from cruel and rude to haughty indifference. “That’s an odd name.”
There was a snort from the other side of the compartment and Remus looked across to see another boy seated beside the door. “Oh, yes, and ‘Sirius’ is as common as the stars, is it?” he asked sarcastically, shoving his glasses back up his nose.
The boy next to Remus provided his companion with a cheeky grin and countered, “As a matter of fact, it is.” He turned back to Remus and stuck his hand out. “Sirius Black, soon-to-be-Gryffindor. Pleasure, Remus Lupin.”
Remus gaped in astonishment at the ebony-haired boy before him. How could a person’s moods change as quick and as often as his did? As he tentatively accepted the boy’s hand gingerly in his own, Remus made a vow to avoid Sirius Black as much as it was humanly possible.
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I don’t mind where you come from
As long as you come to me
But I don’t like illusions I can’t see
Them clearly
I don’t care, no I wouldn't dare
To fix the twist in you
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2.
November, 1972
“Come outside with me,” Sirius demanded, shoving a cloak into Remus’ hands.
“Why can’t James go with you?” he asked his friend, staring warily out the Common Room window at the frozen snow.
Sirius flapped his hand impatiently. “He’s spying on Evans. I swear that bloke isn’t worth a single Knut since he discovered his ‘delicate little flower’. Now, c’mon!” He pulled on Remus’ limp arm.
“Sirius,” Remus protested as the boy pulled him through the portrait hole, “its cold. I don’t want to go outside.”
Sirius rolled his eyes. “That’s why I gave you your cloak, silly. Honestly!” He threw his hands in the air in exasperation. “Besides, it’s the first snow of our second year. Don’t you want to enjoy it?”
Remus grunted, but made no other form of reply. Sirius stopped in the middle of the corridor and turned to face him fully.
“Look,” he said encouragingly, “come play in the snow with me for a bit like an ickle kiddy and I promise I’ll make it worth your while later.”
Remus glanced out of one of the high windows and sighed before turning back to his friend, his resolve crumbling.
“There better be some form of chocolate involved,” he said.
Sirius beamed and propelled him down the staircase.
“Lots and lots of chocolate!” Remus shouted at him.
They arrived outside not a minute later and Sirius immediately dived headfirst into the snow covered ground. Remus stood a distance away, shivering with his arms crossed over his chest and his hands tucked beneath his armpits, warding them from the cold.
“C’mon, Remus!” Sirius called from the midst of his snow ocean.
“I’m fine, thanks,” he replied and Sirius sighed, dislodging himself from the icy water.
“You need to loosen up, Rem,” he told the werewolf benignly. “You always act as though you’re a forty year old man trapped in the body of a twelve year old. It’s not on, mate.”
“And how do you suggest I go about doing that?” Remus snapped a little harshly.
“You know, I’m not really sure,” Sirius replied, cocking his head to the side in consideration. He shrugged and turned away. “Oh well. A puzzle for another day. Just come and frolic.”
“Werewolves don’t frolic,” Remus grumbled to himself, soft enough so that Sirius couldn’t hear him.
“What was that?” his friend called.
“I said,” Remus shouted, “I don’t frolic! And you can’t make me.”
“If you say so,” Sirius replied back. “You’re the boss, O High and Mighty King Lupin.” He provided Remus with a low, graceful bow and a wide smirk, eyes twinkling in mirth.
Remus huffed in frustration, his breath misting in front of him in a white cloud. He stormed away in the direction of the lake’s shore, unaware of Sirius’ eyes following him across the grounds. He walked in silence, lost in his own thoughts. So distracted was he, that the sound of quickly approaching footsteps went unnoticed to his sensitive ears until it was too late to react.
“Yaaa!” Sirius cried half a second before his body collided with Remus’ back, tackling him face first to the ground.
“Mrgphng!” Remus complained, voice obscured by the snow covering his mouth.
Sirius rolled Remus over onto his back beneath him. “I’m sorry,” he said, cupping his hand round his ear, “I couldn’t quite make that out. I’m assuming that is because you are busy relocating your tongue, yes?”
“You utter and complete arse,” Remus snarled, spitting out a mouthful of water directly at Sirius’ face which he dodged easily. His grin increased in intensity.
“Oh, snarky,” the ebony-haired boy chirped in wicked delight. He grabbed a handful of snow and crushed it against the side of Remus’ head, cackling madly.
“Sirius!” Remus sputtered in disbelief. “What did I ever do to you?”
“Nothing,” Sirius replied pointedly, “and that’s precisely the problem. You, Remus Lupin, have no idea how to have any fun.”
A mischievous gleam entered Remus’ eyes as Sirius gazed down at him. He felt a slight pressure on his arm and looked down in time to see his friend’s wand twitching in his hand before five large snowballs splattered across various parts of his back. He yelped in surprise and dived away from Remus and his oncoming attack.
“Oi!” he cried, dodging a ball the size of his head.
“Whatever is the matter, Sirius?” Remus questioned innocently. “I thought you wanted me to have fun?”
“Not at my expense,” the other boy shouted desperately, flinging himself across a snow bank.
“Well,” Remus countered, twirling his wand between his fingers absentmindedly, “I don’t exactly see what the harm is.”
“All right, that’s it!” Sirius growled before taking a running leap at his friend. He missed as Remus sidestepped, but that didn’t deter Sirius as he quickly gained his feet and took off in pursuit of the werewolf. After a good five minutes of this, Sirius finally managed to tackle Remus once more, throwing him back into the snow.
They rolled and shoved one another, their laughter and cackles of delight filling the silent grounds around them. Far in the distance stood two figures, unnoticed by the boys rolling upon the ground.
“Should we help out a bit, do you think?” James asked Peter tentatively.
Peter sighed. “I would say no. Let them exhaust themselves and then we’ll attack when they’re least ready for us.” James smirked at his friend and patted him on the back, settling in to wait.
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You've shown me eventually what you'll do
I don’t mind
I don’t care
As long as you're here
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3.
April, 1973
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Sirius asked softly, feeling his vocal chords ice over.
He, James and Peter had just come through the dormitory door in search of Remus, who was seated on his bed. Peter sat on the edge, as far away from Remus as it was possible to be on the mattress. James was propped against one of the four posts of the frame, simply staring at his friend. Sirius was across the room, leaning against the wall of the window, trying desperately to hide the hurt he could feel deep inside.
Remus lied, he thought, his chest clenching tightly. Remus lied to us. Remus lied to…me.
It was difficult to accept, but they had all the proof they needed. All they were lacking was a confession from Remus himself. And he would lie, Sirius knew. Or he would try to.
“I’m not exactly sure what you three are on about,” he protested, eyes confused. Behind that confusion, though, Sirius saw the spark of panic and fear lighting to life. Remus was worried. Remus was terrified.
“Yes, you do,” James whispered, eyes staring at the floor. “We know where you go every month, Remus.”
“I - I don’t -“ the werewolf attempted once more, but Sirius cut him off in a fit of rage and betrayal.
“You do know!” he roared. “You know exactly what we’re talking about, so stop lying! We followed you; we saw you go into the Shrieking Shack and we saw what happened to you! We know you’re a bloody werewolf, Remus!”
All colour slowly drained from the small boy’s face as Sirius furiously spat out the information and he began to tremble. No, Sirius thought desperately, no, it wasn’t supposed to come out like that. Please don’t be frightened. I didn’t mean it, please!
“I - I’m -“ Remus began, but tapered off as though unable to form words. Sirius watched him in despair and saw the tightening of muscles before the boy could actually move. Remus leaped towards the door in a bid for freedom and Sirius launched his body into the werewolf’s, hindering his escape.
“Remus, don’t,” he pleaded. “Please don’t run. We all need to talk about this.”
“Why are you touching me?” Remus nearly shrieked, trying desperately to shove the bigger boy’s arms off of him. “Why aren’t you running for you lives? Why aren’t you reporting me to the Ministry?”
Remus was shaking uncontrollably and Sirius wanted to cry at the unfairness of it all.
“Why would we do any of that?” Peter spoke for the first time since they had entered the room.
“Why wouldn’t you?” Remus whispered, closing in upon himself. “I’m a werewolf; a horrible, despicable, loathsome dark creature. You should all be terrified of looking at me.”
“Is that how you want us to feel?” James murmured softly, toeing the floor, refusing to meet Remus’ eyes.
“I - it doesn’t matter what I want,” the werewolf stuttered out. “It’s just how it is. I can’t change it; I just have to accept it.”
James’ head jerked up suddenly and his eyes landed on Remus’. “Why?” he asked, barely containing the shouted whine that wanted to emerge. “Why do you have to accept that, Remus? We’re your friends! Do you honestly expect us to toss you aside simply because of something you have absolutely no control over? If that’s what you’ve always been waiting for, you can’t have thought much of us at all.”
“Remus,” Sirius said into his friend’s ear, arms still circled round his small waist, “if you honestly think we’re letting you go that easily, you must be mad! You’re one of the only reasons why any of the other three of us are passing any of our classes and you have a wicked sense of humour that we would be ever so devastated to lose.” Sirius’ trademark grin appeared. “Plus, you’re a rather wonderful person to be around, Moony.”
Remus started in Sirius’ arms and turned wide eyes upon him. “What did you call me?” he asked quietly, dumbfounded with shock.
Sirius’ grin grew wider. “Moony,” he chirped happily to the snickers of James and Peter. “I like it, rather. Spur-of-the-moment sort of thought, but it suits, don’t you think?”
Remus released a breath of air before dropping to the floor as his knees gave out in relief. He began to laugh uproariously and did not stop until the other three had joined him on the floor, all four rolling and clutching stitches in their sides.
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Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
And do it all over again
It's all the same
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4.
September 1, 1973
“Moony!” Sirius screeched directly before all of Remus’ air supply was cut off.
“Sirius…can’t - breathe,” he choked out, trying to shove Sirius’ arms away from his chest.
“I missed you, though,” the dark haired boy whined. “You didn’t write nearly enough.”
“Sirius,” Remus gasped, unsuccessfully attempting to collect the breath he had lost, “I wrote you three times a week for the entire summer.”
“Well, it wasn’t enough,” he responded with a pout. He looked down at his shoes and scuffed his toe over the platform.
“All right,” Remus finally said, trying to hide the quirk at the corners of his mouth, “so that I’ll know in the future, what would you consider to be enough?”
Sirius raised his eyes and looked at Remus sheepishly from beneath his lashes. “Right now’s enough.”
*
February, 1974
“’Lo, Moony,” Sirius murmured sleepily.
Remus flexed his muscles and groaned as he quickly sank back down within the white sheets of his hospital bed. Another rough moon, he thought to himself.
“Hurt badly?” Sirius asked softly, eyes worried.
Remus offered him a brief, forced smile. “I’m all right. It’s not so very bad, really.”
Sirius continued to stare at him, unconvinced. “Does your arm hurt?”
“I - not really,” the werewolf stuttered out after a confused moment.
Sirius shook his head and held out his hand. “Give it to me, you overgrown pup.” He didn’t give Remus a chance to question why as he slid his hand beneath the sheets and extracted the boy’s right arm.
“Sirius, what -“ Remus began, but the bigger boy cut him off with a sharp glance.
“Trust me, Rem,” he said with a small smile. His fingers slowly started working along Remus’ wrist and up the length of his arm to his shoulder, massaging the muscles loose. As Sirius reached the top of his arm and began to work back down again, Remus gradually relaxed back into the mattress.
“That - feels exceedingly good, Sirius,” he admitted. Sirius flashed him a grin.
“Told you to have faith.”
Remus hummed, but made no further reply as he was slowly lulled into a state of semi-consciousness. They said nothing for a long while, Remus dozing and relaxed as Sirius continued to work the muscles in his arm.
“Is it always this bad?” Sirius finally whispered.
“What?” Remus jerked, his body tensing again at his friend’s question.
Sirius motioned to the corner of a white bandage across Remus’ chest, peeking out from under the sheets. “Are you always this hurt?”
Remus struggled for words, wanting to deny it while also not wanting to lie to Sirius. He didn’t get a chance.
“I saw you,” Sirius continued, hands falling still on Remus’ arm and his hair falling into his eyes as he bowed his head. “I was hiding in here under the cloak when Madame Pomfrey brought you in this morning.” His hands clenched around the smaller boy’s arm, his nails digging into the flesh without thought. “There wasn’t a single part of your body that wasn’t covered in blood, Remus.”
“Sirius…” Remus tried, but he really did not know what to say.
“How do you deal with it, month after endless month?” His breathing was heavy and laboured as though he was about to explode. “All that pain - you just bottle it up and you’re always so calm and rational and you’re never angry and you tolerate the three of us with patience even Mother Teresa doesn’t possess and you -“
“Sirius,” Remus interjected gently, “you’re rambling.” Sirius’ mouth snapped shut as a light flush stained his cheeks.
“Sorry,” he mumbled.
“Don’t apologise,” Remus told him with a shake of his head. “I know you’re worried, Sirius, but really, I’m fine.” Sirius gazed at him with skeptical eyes, unbelieving. “I’m used to it, at any rate and there’s nothing can be done for it. It’s simply something I have to live with.”
Sirius leaned forward and rested his head on Remus’ shoulder. “It shouldn’t have to be like that. We’ll help you, Remus. Someway, somehow, we’ll help you.”
*
October, 1974
“Sirius,” Remus asked, “what are you doing out here?”
The dark haired boy rolled his eyes to the side, looking up at his friend from his position on the ground. He shrugged as best as he could.
“Just needed some fresh air.”
“Ah,” Remus replied. “Care if I join you?”
Sirius shook his head and Remus lay down in the space beside him, folding his arms behind his head.
“Do you ever look at the stars, Remus?” Sirius asked after a while.
“Never really have time to,” he replied, growing curious of Sirius’ dejected tone.
“That right there,” the older boy said, pointing a finger to a far off spot in the sky, “that’s Cassiopeia, did you know?” Of course Remus knew. He had taken Astronomy right along with Sirius for two years. “My great aunt is named after it. Horrible old bat, she is.
“Then, of course, there is the lovely Bellatrix sitting directly upon Orion’s shoulder.” Sirius snorted. “Which only suits, it seems. My father loves Bellatrix.”
Remus was beginning to notice a pattern to the murmuring Sirius was doing. He rolled onto his side and looked at his friend, grey eyes cast in shadow.
“What happened, Sirius?” he asked softly.
Sirius glanced away, staring in the direction of the forest as he nervously bit his lip. Finally, he sighed and turned his gaze back to Remus.
“That letter I got earlier,” he said tentatively, “it was from my mum.” He swallowed. “Apparently, she wanted to inform me that my fifteenth birthday was next week. She and my father think it is high time that I start settling down and searching for a proper pureblood. According to them, when I turn sixteen, I’ll begin ‘courting’ and as soon as I leave Hogwarts, we’ll marry. If I don’t choose someone acceptable, they’ll choose for me.”
Remus gaped at him in astonishment. “You - you’re just a child, Sirius. How can they possibly expect you to think about that sort of thing now?”
“I know, but I have to do it, Remus,” Sirius whispered.
“Why?” Remus breathed out forcefully. “Why do you have to do it?” For some reason, it hurt him more than he was willing to admit.
“Because,” Sirius began before he stopped and cleared his throat. “Because they’ve already chosen the person they want me to marry.”
Remus didn’t want to ask simply because of the horror slowly etching its way onto Sirius’ face, but he had to. “Who?”
Sirius released a shuddering breath. “Bella…”
Remus’ whole body tensed when he heard the name. He wanted to shout, “But you’re cousins!” but he knew that wouldn’t help. Sirius was still staring at the stars with utter loathing and Remus could only think of one thing to do. He rolled back over onto his back and watched the stars as well while his hand moved to his friend’s.
“We’ll help you, Sirius,” Remus repeated, his hand gripping Sirius’ tightly. “Someway, somehow, we’ll help you.” Sirius provided the smallest of smiles to the night sky as his hand squeezed Remus’.
*
March 10, 1975
Sirius tried to be as quiet as possible as he slipped out of his bed and between the hangings. He padded across the stone floor silently, pausing briefly to listen to the sounds of the dorm around him. He heard Peter’s soft snores from the bed next to the door and James’ hushed mumblings from the bed across from Sirius’ own. He heard nothing from Remus’ bed as the werewolf was the quietest of them all, only the softest of hissed breaths emerging from between his lips. Sirius sighed and slipped soundlessly through the other curtains.
“Sirius,” Remus mumbled, his lips twitching.
“Bloody -“ Sirius exclaimed as he started violently. “Give a bloke some warning next time, would you?”
Remus snorted as his brown eyes sparkled wickedly. Sirius’ heart leapt up into his throat and he found himself unable to speak.
“The way I see it,” the werewolf countered, “you’re the one sneaking into my bed in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. I believe I’m the one who deserves the warning, wouldn’t you agree?”
“No, you don’t,” Sirius snapped without any malice, “because you knew I was coming anyhow, apparently.”
“The point still stands,” Remus said, forcing a smile from his lips.
Sirius huffed in frustration. “Well, it’s not the middle of the night. It’s only midnight.”
“What are you doing here, Sirius?”
“I - Well, I wanted to be the first to wish you a happy birthday, Rem,” he murmured sheepishly, stumbling slightly over the words.
Remus looked taken aback. “My birthday isn’t that important, Sirius. You should have stayed in bed. You’ll need your rest for lessons tomorrow.”
“Of course it’s important,” Sirius exclaimed softly. “Fifteen years ago today our very own Remus John Lupin was brought into the world so that he might later be harassed and corrupted by three very handsome troublemakers.”
Remus snorted out a laugh before he could stop himself. “Has this always been my destiny, then? Been rooting round in the tea leaves again, Mr. Black?”
“Is there one you’d rather prefer?”
Remus sobered suddenly as he gazed across his mattress at Sirius. “No,” he said with a slight shake of his head, “no, I’m quite pleased with what I have.”
Sirius beamed and pulled a small, rectangular box from the folds of his pyjamas and offered it across the space to Remus. “Happy birthday, Moony!”
Remus stared at the package for a long moment, shock written all across his face.
“Well, aren’t you going to take it? You honestly can’t still be surprised after spending four birthdays with us.”
He accepted the box in Sirius’ hand gently and ran his fingers around the edges of the crinkling paper reverently. He glanced up at Sirius as he said, “It’ll always be a shock.” He sliced his nail across the Spellotape and slowly pulled the paper from the package. He removed the lid and found three large bars of his favourite type of Honeydukes chocolate.
“Wow,” Remus murmured. He looked up and saw his friend staring at him hopefully. “Sirius…”
“I know it’s not much,” Sirius interjected quickly, “but I do have you something else that’s a bit better, but, well, I thought I’d wait and give it to you when the other two gave you their gifts.”
Remus shook his head as Sirius maneuvered his body until he was leaning against Remus’ headboard, both boys shoulder to shoulder. “You shouldn’t have even got me this.”
“Do you like it?” the older boy asked. “It took me forever to decide what type to get you. You’ll eat anything that even remotely smells of chocolate. You’d eat my foot if it smelled like a Chocolate Frog.”
Remus choked on a burst of laughter. “You know I do,” he answered, grinning.
“Good,” Sirius said with a nod.
Remus removed the wrapping from one of the bars and broke off a piece of the sweet. He pushed it into his mouth and savoured the taste as it slowly melted on his tongue. He broke off another piece and offered it to Sirius, who accepted gratefully and leaned his head against Remus’ shoulder as he ate it.
They finished the chocolate in silence and as the last piece was devoured, they drifted off to sleep against one another with chocolate on their breaths and stomachs full of sugary warmth.
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Hours slide and days go by
Till you decide to come
But in-between it always seems too long
For certain
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5.
December, 1975
Remus shuffled through the dormitory door, leaning his weight against it as it clicked shut. His fingers worked unconsciously on the bandage hidden beneath his trouser leg on his thigh. It had been a rough moon, but that wasn’t anything new to him. What was more worrisome at the time was the fact that his three trouble-maker friends were nowhere to be found.
“’Lo,” he called through the room. “James? Pete? Anybody here?” He glanced towards the open door of the toilet and said questioningly, “Sirius?” Silence.
Remus sighed and gathered his strength to make his way to his bed. He’d taken three steps into the middle of the room when he heard a snuffling sound from under Sirius’ bed, followed by a light scratching. His eyes narrowed as he stared in the direction of the noise, straining his sensitive ears for anything else out of the ordinary. The scraping noise sounded again and Remus made his way to Sirius’ bed, leaning down to his knees slowly to gain better access to the underside of the mattress.
Suddenly, there was a loud snort and hot breath puffed across his face before he heard the strident scrabbling of claws across the hardwood and he was shoved backwards onto the floor by a giant black blur. He gasped in surprise and his mind clenched up tightly before thoughts began to spew out of it.
Merlin, that’s it, I’m dead, he thought desperately. I’m dead; Sirius and his stupid obsession with creatures and beasts. I’m dead; Sirius has been spending time with Hagrid again and now he’s got himself a pet. I’m dead; Sirius’ new pet it going to eat me. I’m dead!
Remus waited in panicked silence for a long moment, but nothing happened. There was a warm, heavy weight pressing down on his chest and stomach and the slightly unpleasant sensation of sticky slobber smeared across one half of his face, but there were no teeth and no sharp, digging claws. He cracked a wary eye open.
“What the -?” he began before cutting himself off and staring at the massive black dog sprawled across his body. “Er…hullo.”
The dog’s tongue lolled out in what could only be described as a grin somehow faintly reminiscent of Sirius. Remus’ eyes narrowed in suspicion once again as he opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by a loud banging sound coming from within the toilet. His head jerked around just in time to see an enormous rack of antlers maneuvering around the door frame. Remus gaped in astonishment.
His deeper human instincts shouted at him to, ‘Flee, flee now!’ while his more primitive wolf instincts growled that he should stay and fight for his territory. Remus gritted his teeth against the second wave and pushed it backwards. It wasn’t as though he could do either, really. He was, after all, trapped between the wooden floor and a giant ball of fluff.
He was deciding whether he should risk his wand hand by trying to shove the monster of a dog off of himself when there was a faint squeak from behind his head. His breath caught in his throat as his eyes glanced towards the stag that had finally made its way through the door and was standing a few feet away. Remus slowly rolled his head backwards, neck straining, until he saw a faint shadow beneath James’ bed. A brown rat scurried out quickly and moved up by his ear, its nose twitching enthusiastically.
“All right, that’s enough!” Remus shoved the dog off him and picked himself up off the floor as quickly as he could, trying not to grit his teeth against the pain. He noticed the dog watching him almost…sympathetically. “Where did you three come from?” He stared between all three animals, almost as though they were going to answer his question. “Right. Well, this was a wonderful prank and I’ll have to remember to thank those three for putting so much effort out for me, but now you have to go.” He felt a growl rising in his chest.
Remus stared balefully at the dog, its eyes almost challenging. It seemed - for some reason Remus couldn’t fathom - that the other animals were taking their cues from him. The growl finally emerged, low and threatening, when the dog made no attempt to move. Remus began to walk to the door to shove them out and down into the common room, when he eyes drifted back to the dog’s.
They’re grey, he thought in amazement. Dogs don’t have grey eyes, but humans do…Sirius does…
“S - Sirius?” he stuttered out. The dog barked loudly and trotted around the room in a small circle, tail straight in the air and curled at the tip, shoulders pushed back, and head held high in pride. The dog - Sirius, his mind corrected - then shook his head and pointed it towards the stag in the corner of the room.
The stag bowed its head in a graceful, regal manner and Remus studied it. Almost immediately, he noticed the faint, darker markings around its eyes.
“James?” he gasped out. The stag stomped its hooves across the floor gently in confirmation, its tail flicking a bit.
There was a loud squeaking from behind him and he turned to look down at the rat. Its brown body trembled with excitement as it began to run circles around Remus’ shoes. The loud squeals echoed through the room as Remus shook his head in astonishment.
“Peter?”
His eyes widened in utter disbelief when the rat leaped up and did a slight flip in midair before darting across the room and climbing up on top of Peter’s bed, where he quickly transformed. The other two followed his lead, Sirius and James appearing where the dog and stag had once stood.
Sirius looked at Remus in apprehension, so much energy coursing through his body it could almost be heard. “So,” he asked cautiously, “what d’you think, Moony?”
Remus promptly fainted.
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But I have the skill, yeah
I have the will, to breathe you in while I can
However long you stay is all that I am
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Part Two
Rating: R
Characters: Remus Lupin, Sirius Black
Pairings: Remus Lupin/Sirius Black
Summary: 'I don't mind; I don't care; as long as you're here.' Snapshots of Remus' and Sirius' lives together from their first year on.
Disclaimer: Anything you recognise does not belong to me.
Warnings: Male/Male relationship; language
Art Notes: Originally drawn by the_realduck for my request for rs_small_gifts, and they came out looking fantastic! Didn't she do an amazing job?! I immediately requested permission to add them to this story, and she graciously said yes! Original post can be seen here. Artist's post can be viewed here.
A/N: Thanks to XxXRegretXxX for the quick beta work.
I know, it’s a song-fic. I’m not particularly fond of them either, but sometimes an idea latches onto your mind and it just won’t let you loose, no matter how much you shake it. This is the result from the latch. I hope everyone enjoys!
All the Same
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1.
September 1, 1971
“Oi! So who are you, then?” a proper voice asked somewhat rudely.
Remus glanced up from his knees warily to meet a pair of silvery, grey eyes. His mouth worked silently for a few moments unable to form words. Apparently the boy attached to the odd eyes wasn’t one for patience.
“Are you going to answer or aren’t you?” he all but snapped, his lips twitching up into a small smirk.
“R-Remus,” he replied softly. “Remus Lupin.”
“Remus?” the boy asked, dropping down into the seat next to the smaller boy. He was shocked at how quickly the newcomer’s attitude changed from cruel and rude to haughty indifference. “That’s an odd name.”
There was a snort from the other side of the compartment and Remus looked across to see another boy seated beside the door. “Oh, yes, and ‘Sirius’ is as common as the stars, is it?” he asked sarcastically, shoving his glasses back up his nose.
The boy next to Remus provided his companion with a cheeky grin and countered, “As a matter of fact, it is.” He turned back to Remus and stuck his hand out. “Sirius Black, soon-to-be-Gryffindor. Pleasure, Remus Lupin.”
Remus gaped in astonishment at the ebony-haired boy before him. How could a person’s moods change as quick and as often as his did? As he tentatively accepted the boy’s hand gingerly in his own, Remus made a vow to avoid Sirius Black as much as it was humanly possible.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I don’t mind where you come from
As long as you come to me
But I don’t like illusions I can’t see
Them clearly
I don’t care, no I wouldn't dare
To fix the twist in you
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2.
November, 1972
“Come outside with me,” Sirius demanded, shoving a cloak into Remus’ hands.
“Why can’t James go with you?” he asked his friend, staring warily out the Common Room window at the frozen snow.
Sirius flapped his hand impatiently. “He’s spying on Evans. I swear that bloke isn’t worth a single Knut since he discovered his ‘delicate little flower’. Now, c’mon!” He pulled on Remus’ limp arm.
“Sirius,” Remus protested as the boy pulled him through the portrait hole, “its cold. I don’t want to go outside.”
Sirius rolled his eyes. “That’s why I gave you your cloak, silly. Honestly!” He threw his hands in the air in exasperation. “Besides, it’s the first snow of our second year. Don’t you want to enjoy it?”
Remus grunted, but made no other form of reply. Sirius stopped in the middle of the corridor and turned to face him fully.
“Look,” he said encouragingly, “come play in the snow with me for a bit like an ickle kiddy and I promise I’ll make it worth your while later.”
Remus glanced out of one of the high windows and sighed before turning back to his friend, his resolve crumbling.
“There better be some form of chocolate involved,” he said.
Sirius beamed and propelled him down the staircase.
“Lots and lots of chocolate!” Remus shouted at him.
They arrived outside not a minute later and Sirius immediately dived headfirst into the snow covered ground. Remus stood a distance away, shivering with his arms crossed over his chest and his hands tucked beneath his armpits, warding them from the cold.
“C’mon, Remus!” Sirius called from the midst of his snow ocean.
“I’m fine, thanks,” he replied and Sirius sighed, dislodging himself from the icy water.
“You need to loosen up, Rem,” he told the werewolf benignly. “You always act as though you’re a forty year old man trapped in the body of a twelve year old. It’s not on, mate.”
“And how do you suggest I go about doing that?” Remus snapped a little harshly.
“You know, I’m not really sure,” Sirius replied, cocking his head to the side in consideration. He shrugged and turned away. “Oh well. A puzzle for another day. Just come and frolic.”
“Werewolves don’t frolic,” Remus grumbled to himself, soft enough so that Sirius couldn’t hear him.
“What was that?” his friend called.
“I said,” Remus shouted, “I don’t frolic! And you can’t make me.”
“If you say so,” Sirius replied back. “You’re the boss, O High and Mighty King Lupin.” He provided Remus with a low, graceful bow and a wide smirk, eyes twinkling in mirth.
Remus huffed in frustration, his breath misting in front of him in a white cloud. He stormed away in the direction of the lake’s shore, unaware of Sirius’ eyes following him across the grounds. He walked in silence, lost in his own thoughts. So distracted was he, that the sound of quickly approaching footsteps went unnoticed to his sensitive ears until it was too late to react.
“Yaaa!” Sirius cried half a second before his body collided with Remus’ back, tackling him face first to the ground.
“Mrgphng!” Remus complained, voice obscured by the snow covering his mouth.
Sirius rolled Remus over onto his back beneath him. “I’m sorry,” he said, cupping his hand round his ear, “I couldn’t quite make that out. I’m assuming that is because you are busy relocating your tongue, yes?”
“You utter and complete arse,” Remus snarled, spitting out a mouthful of water directly at Sirius’ face which he dodged easily. His grin increased in intensity.
“Oh, snarky,” the ebony-haired boy chirped in wicked delight. He grabbed a handful of snow and crushed it against the side of Remus’ head, cackling madly.
“Sirius!” Remus sputtered in disbelief. “What did I ever do to you?”
“Nothing,” Sirius replied pointedly, “and that’s precisely the problem. You, Remus Lupin, have no idea how to have any fun.”
A mischievous gleam entered Remus’ eyes as Sirius gazed down at him. He felt a slight pressure on his arm and looked down in time to see his friend’s wand twitching in his hand before five large snowballs splattered across various parts of his back. He yelped in surprise and dived away from Remus and his oncoming attack.
“Oi!” he cried, dodging a ball the size of his head.
“Whatever is the matter, Sirius?” Remus questioned innocently. “I thought you wanted me to have fun?”
“Not at my expense,” the other boy shouted desperately, flinging himself across a snow bank.
“Well,” Remus countered, twirling his wand between his fingers absentmindedly, “I don’t exactly see what the harm is.”
“All right, that’s it!” Sirius growled before taking a running leap at his friend. He missed as Remus sidestepped, but that didn’t deter Sirius as he quickly gained his feet and took off in pursuit of the werewolf. After a good five minutes of this, Sirius finally managed to tackle Remus once more, throwing him back into the snow.
They rolled and shoved one another, their laughter and cackles of delight filling the silent grounds around them. Far in the distance stood two figures, unnoticed by the boys rolling upon the ground.
“Should we help out a bit, do you think?” James asked Peter tentatively.
Peter sighed. “I would say no. Let them exhaust themselves and then we’ll attack when they’re least ready for us.” James smirked at his friend and patted him on the back, settling in to wait.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You've shown me eventually what you'll do
I don’t mind
I don’t care
As long as you're here
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
3.
April, 1973
“Why didn’t you tell us?” Sirius asked softly, feeling his vocal chords ice over.
He, James and Peter had just come through the dormitory door in search of Remus, who was seated on his bed. Peter sat on the edge, as far away from Remus as it was possible to be on the mattress. James was propped against one of the four posts of the frame, simply staring at his friend. Sirius was across the room, leaning against the wall of the window, trying desperately to hide the hurt he could feel deep inside.
Remus lied, he thought, his chest clenching tightly. Remus lied to us. Remus lied to…me.
It was difficult to accept, but they had all the proof they needed. All they were lacking was a confession from Remus himself. And he would lie, Sirius knew. Or he would try to.
“I’m not exactly sure what you three are on about,” he protested, eyes confused. Behind that confusion, though, Sirius saw the spark of panic and fear lighting to life. Remus was worried. Remus was terrified.
“Yes, you do,” James whispered, eyes staring at the floor. “We know where you go every month, Remus.”
“I - I don’t -“ the werewolf attempted once more, but Sirius cut him off in a fit of rage and betrayal.
“You do know!” he roared. “You know exactly what we’re talking about, so stop lying! We followed you; we saw you go into the Shrieking Shack and we saw what happened to you! We know you’re a bloody werewolf, Remus!”
All colour slowly drained from the small boy’s face as Sirius furiously spat out the information and he began to tremble. No, Sirius thought desperately, no, it wasn’t supposed to come out like that. Please don’t be frightened. I didn’t mean it, please!
“I - I’m -“ Remus began, but tapered off as though unable to form words. Sirius watched him in despair and saw the tightening of muscles before the boy could actually move. Remus leaped towards the door in a bid for freedom and Sirius launched his body into the werewolf’s, hindering his escape.
“Remus, don’t,” he pleaded. “Please don’t run. We all need to talk about this.”
“Why are you touching me?” Remus nearly shrieked, trying desperately to shove the bigger boy’s arms off of him. “Why aren’t you running for you lives? Why aren’t you reporting me to the Ministry?”
Remus was shaking uncontrollably and Sirius wanted to cry at the unfairness of it all.
“Why would we do any of that?” Peter spoke for the first time since they had entered the room.
“Why wouldn’t you?” Remus whispered, closing in upon himself. “I’m a werewolf; a horrible, despicable, loathsome dark creature. You should all be terrified of looking at me.”
“Is that how you want us to feel?” James murmured softly, toeing the floor, refusing to meet Remus’ eyes.
“I - it doesn’t matter what I want,” the werewolf stuttered out. “It’s just how it is. I can’t change it; I just have to accept it.”
James’ head jerked up suddenly and his eyes landed on Remus’. “Why?” he asked, barely containing the shouted whine that wanted to emerge. “Why do you have to accept that, Remus? We’re your friends! Do you honestly expect us to toss you aside simply because of something you have absolutely no control over? If that’s what you’ve always been waiting for, you can’t have thought much of us at all.”
“Remus,” Sirius said into his friend’s ear, arms still circled round his small waist, “if you honestly think we’re letting you go that easily, you must be mad! You’re one of the only reasons why any of the other three of us are passing any of our classes and you have a wicked sense of humour that we would be ever so devastated to lose.” Sirius’ trademark grin appeared. “Plus, you’re a rather wonderful person to be around, Moony.”
Remus started in Sirius’ arms and turned wide eyes upon him. “What did you call me?” he asked quietly, dumbfounded with shock.
Sirius’ grin grew wider. “Moony,” he chirped happily to the snickers of James and Peter. “I like it, rather. Spur-of-the-moment sort of thought, but it suits, don’t you think?”
Remus released a breath of air before dropping to the floor as his knees gave out in relief. He began to laugh uproariously and did not stop until the other three had joined him on the floor, all four rolling and clutching stitches in their sides.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
And do it all over again
It's all the same
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
4.
September 1, 1973
“Moony!” Sirius screeched directly before all of Remus’ air supply was cut off.
“Sirius…can’t - breathe,” he choked out, trying to shove Sirius’ arms away from his chest.
“I missed you, though,” the dark haired boy whined. “You didn’t write nearly enough.”
“Sirius,” Remus gasped, unsuccessfully attempting to collect the breath he had lost, “I wrote you three times a week for the entire summer.”
“Well, it wasn’t enough,” he responded with a pout. He looked down at his shoes and scuffed his toe over the platform.
“All right,” Remus finally said, trying to hide the quirk at the corners of his mouth, “so that I’ll know in the future, what would you consider to be enough?”
Sirius raised his eyes and looked at Remus sheepishly from beneath his lashes. “Right now’s enough.”
*
February, 1974
“’Lo, Moony,” Sirius murmured sleepily.
Remus flexed his muscles and groaned as he quickly sank back down within the white sheets of his hospital bed. Another rough moon, he thought to himself.
“Hurt badly?” Sirius asked softly, eyes worried.
Remus offered him a brief, forced smile. “I’m all right. It’s not so very bad, really.”
Sirius continued to stare at him, unconvinced. “Does your arm hurt?”
“I - not really,” the werewolf stuttered out after a confused moment.
Sirius shook his head and held out his hand. “Give it to me, you overgrown pup.” He didn’t give Remus a chance to question why as he slid his hand beneath the sheets and extracted the boy’s right arm.
“Sirius, what -“ Remus began, but the bigger boy cut him off with a sharp glance.
“Trust me, Rem,” he said with a small smile. His fingers slowly started working along Remus’ wrist and up the length of his arm to his shoulder, massaging the muscles loose. As Sirius reached the top of his arm and began to work back down again, Remus gradually relaxed back into the mattress.
“That - feels exceedingly good, Sirius,” he admitted. Sirius flashed him a grin.
“Told you to have faith.”
Remus hummed, but made no further reply as he was slowly lulled into a state of semi-consciousness. They said nothing for a long while, Remus dozing and relaxed as Sirius continued to work the muscles in his arm.
“Is it always this bad?” Sirius finally whispered.
“What?” Remus jerked, his body tensing again at his friend’s question.
Sirius motioned to the corner of a white bandage across Remus’ chest, peeking out from under the sheets. “Are you always this hurt?”
Remus struggled for words, wanting to deny it while also not wanting to lie to Sirius. He didn’t get a chance.
“I saw you,” Sirius continued, hands falling still on Remus’ arm and his hair falling into his eyes as he bowed his head. “I was hiding in here under the cloak when Madame Pomfrey brought you in this morning.” His hands clenched around the smaller boy’s arm, his nails digging into the flesh without thought. “There wasn’t a single part of your body that wasn’t covered in blood, Remus.”
“Sirius…” Remus tried, but he really did not know what to say.
“How do you deal with it, month after endless month?” His breathing was heavy and laboured as though he was about to explode. “All that pain - you just bottle it up and you’re always so calm and rational and you’re never angry and you tolerate the three of us with patience even Mother Teresa doesn’t possess and you -“
“Sirius,” Remus interjected gently, “you’re rambling.” Sirius’ mouth snapped shut as a light flush stained his cheeks.
“Sorry,” he mumbled.
“Don’t apologise,” Remus told him with a shake of his head. “I know you’re worried, Sirius, but really, I’m fine.” Sirius gazed at him with skeptical eyes, unbelieving. “I’m used to it, at any rate and there’s nothing can be done for it. It’s simply something I have to live with.”
Sirius leaned forward and rested his head on Remus’ shoulder. “It shouldn’t have to be like that. We’ll help you, Remus. Someway, somehow, we’ll help you.”
*
October, 1974
“Sirius,” Remus asked, “what are you doing out here?”
The dark haired boy rolled his eyes to the side, looking up at his friend from his position on the ground. He shrugged as best as he could.
“Just needed some fresh air.”
“Ah,” Remus replied. “Care if I join you?”
Sirius shook his head and Remus lay down in the space beside him, folding his arms behind his head.
“Do you ever look at the stars, Remus?” Sirius asked after a while.
“Never really have time to,” he replied, growing curious of Sirius’ dejected tone.
“That right there,” the older boy said, pointing a finger to a far off spot in the sky, “that’s Cassiopeia, did you know?” Of course Remus knew. He had taken Astronomy right along with Sirius for two years. “My great aunt is named after it. Horrible old bat, she is.
“Then, of course, there is the lovely Bellatrix sitting directly upon Orion’s shoulder.” Sirius snorted. “Which only suits, it seems. My father loves Bellatrix.”
Remus was beginning to notice a pattern to the murmuring Sirius was doing. He rolled onto his side and looked at his friend, grey eyes cast in shadow.
“What happened, Sirius?” he asked softly.
Sirius glanced away, staring in the direction of the forest as he nervously bit his lip. Finally, he sighed and turned his gaze back to Remus.
“That letter I got earlier,” he said tentatively, “it was from my mum.” He swallowed. “Apparently, she wanted to inform me that my fifteenth birthday was next week. She and my father think it is high time that I start settling down and searching for a proper pureblood. According to them, when I turn sixteen, I’ll begin ‘courting’ and as soon as I leave Hogwarts, we’ll marry. If I don’t choose someone acceptable, they’ll choose for me.”
Remus gaped at him in astonishment. “You - you’re just a child, Sirius. How can they possibly expect you to think about that sort of thing now?”
“I know, but I have to do it, Remus,” Sirius whispered.
“Why?” Remus breathed out forcefully. “Why do you have to do it?” For some reason, it hurt him more than he was willing to admit.
“Because,” Sirius began before he stopped and cleared his throat. “Because they’ve already chosen the person they want me to marry.”
Remus didn’t want to ask simply because of the horror slowly etching its way onto Sirius’ face, but he had to. “Who?”
Sirius released a shuddering breath. “Bella…”
Remus’ whole body tensed when he heard the name. He wanted to shout, “But you’re cousins!” but he knew that wouldn’t help. Sirius was still staring at the stars with utter loathing and Remus could only think of one thing to do. He rolled back over onto his back and watched the stars as well while his hand moved to his friend’s.
“We’ll help you, Sirius,” Remus repeated, his hand gripping Sirius’ tightly. “Someway, somehow, we’ll help you.” Sirius provided the smallest of smiles to the night sky as his hand squeezed Remus’.
*
March 10, 1975
Sirius tried to be as quiet as possible as he slipped out of his bed and between the hangings. He padded across the stone floor silently, pausing briefly to listen to the sounds of the dorm around him. He heard Peter’s soft snores from the bed next to the door and James’ hushed mumblings from the bed across from Sirius’ own. He heard nothing from Remus’ bed as the werewolf was the quietest of them all, only the softest of hissed breaths emerging from between his lips. Sirius sighed and slipped soundlessly through the other curtains.
“Sirius,” Remus mumbled, his lips twitching.
“Bloody -“ Sirius exclaimed as he started violently. “Give a bloke some warning next time, would you?”
Remus snorted as his brown eyes sparkled wickedly. Sirius’ heart leapt up into his throat and he found himself unable to speak.
“The way I see it,” the werewolf countered, “you’re the one sneaking into my bed in the middle of the night for no apparent reason. I believe I’m the one who deserves the warning, wouldn’t you agree?”
“No, you don’t,” Sirius snapped without any malice, “because you knew I was coming anyhow, apparently.”
“The point still stands,” Remus said, forcing a smile from his lips.
Sirius huffed in frustration. “Well, it’s not the middle of the night. It’s only midnight.”
“What are you doing here, Sirius?”
“I - Well, I wanted to be the first to wish you a happy birthday, Rem,” he murmured sheepishly, stumbling slightly over the words.
Remus looked taken aback. “My birthday isn’t that important, Sirius. You should have stayed in bed. You’ll need your rest for lessons tomorrow.”
“Of course it’s important,” Sirius exclaimed softly. “Fifteen years ago today our very own Remus John Lupin was brought into the world so that he might later be harassed and corrupted by three very handsome troublemakers.”
Remus snorted out a laugh before he could stop himself. “Has this always been my destiny, then? Been rooting round in the tea leaves again, Mr. Black?”
“Is there one you’d rather prefer?”
Remus sobered suddenly as he gazed across his mattress at Sirius. “No,” he said with a slight shake of his head, “no, I’m quite pleased with what I have.”
Sirius beamed and pulled a small, rectangular box from the folds of his pyjamas and offered it across the space to Remus. “Happy birthday, Moony!”
Remus stared at the package for a long moment, shock written all across his face.
“Well, aren’t you going to take it? You honestly can’t still be surprised after spending four birthdays with us.”
He accepted the box in Sirius’ hand gently and ran his fingers around the edges of the crinkling paper reverently. He glanced up at Sirius as he said, “It’ll always be a shock.” He sliced his nail across the Spellotape and slowly pulled the paper from the package. He removed the lid and found three large bars of his favourite type of Honeydukes chocolate.
“Wow,” Remus murmured. He looked up and saw his friend staring at him hopefully. “Sirius…”
“I know it’s not much,” Sirius interjected quickly, “but I do have you something else that’s a bit better, but, well, I thought I’d wait and give it to you when the other two gave you their gifts.”
Remus shook his head as Sirius maneuvered his body until he was leaning against Remus’ headboard, both boys shoulder to shoulder. “You shouldn’t have even got me this.”
“Do you like it?” the older boy asked. “It took me forever to decide what type to get you. You’ll eat anything that even remotely smells of chocolate. You’d eat my foot if it smelled like a Chocolate Frog.”
Remus choked on a burst of laughter. “You know I do,” he answered, grinning.
“Good,” Sirius said with a nod.
Remus removed the wrapping from one of the bars and broke off a piece of the sweet. He pushed it into his mouth and savoured the taste as it slowly melted on his tongue. He broke off another piece and offered it to Sirius, who accepted gratefully and leaned his head against Remus’ shoulder as he ate it.
They finished the chocolate in silence and as the last piece was devoured, they drifted off to sleep against one another with chocolate on their breaths and stomachs full of sugary warmth.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hours slide and days go by
Till you decide to come
But in-between it always seems too long
For certain
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
5.
December, 1975
Remus shuffled through the dormitory door, leaning his weight against it as it clicked shut. His fingers worked unconsciously on the bandage hidden beneath his trouser leg on his thigh. It had been a rough moon, but that wasn’t anything new to him. What was more worrisome at the time was the fact that his three trouble-maker friends were nowhere to be found.
“’Lo,” he called through the room. “James? Pete? Anybody here?” He glanced towards the open door of the toilet and said questioningly, “Sirius?” Silence.
Remus sighed and gathered his strength to make his way to his bed. He’d taken three steps into the middle of the room when he heard a snuffling sound from under Sirius’ bed, followed by a light scratching. His eyes narrowed as he stared in the direction of the noise, straining his sensitive ears for anything else out of the ordinary. The scraping noise sounded again and Remus made his way to Sirius’ bed, leaning down to his knees slowly to gain better access to the underside of the mattress.
Suddenly, there was a loud snort and hot breath puffed across his face before he heard the strident scrabbling of claws across the hardwood and he was shoved backwards onto the floor by a giant black blur. He gasped in surprise and his mind clenched up tightly before thoughts began to spew out of it.
Merlin, that’s it, I’m dead, he thought desperately. I’m dead; Sirius and his stupid obsession with creatures and beasts. I’m dead; Sirius has been spending time with Hagrid again and now he’s got himself a pet. I’m dead; Sirius’ new pet it going to eat me. I’m dead!
Remus waited in panicked silence for a long moment, but nothing happened. There was a warm, heavy weight pressing down on his chest and stomach and the slightly unpleasant sensation of sticky slobber smeared across one half of his face, but there were no teeth and no sharp, digging claws. He cracked a wary eye open.
“What the -?” he began before cutting himself off and staring at the massive black dog sprawled across his body. “Er…hullo.”
The dog’s tongue lolled out in what could only be described as a grin somehow faintly reminiscent of Sirius. Remus’ eyes narrowed in suspicion once again as he opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by a loud banging sound coming from within the toilet. His head jerked around just in time to see an enormous rack of antlers maneuvering around the door frame. Remus gaped in astonishment.
His deeper human instincts shouted at him to, ‘Flee, flee now!’ while his more primitive wolf instincts growled that he should stay and fight for his territory. Remus gritted his teeth against the second wave and pushed it backwards. It wasn’t as though he could do either, really. He was, after all, trapped between the wooden floor and a giant ball of fluff.
He was deciding whether he should risk his wand hand by trying to shove the monster of a dog off of himself when there was a faint squeak from behind his head. His breath caught in his throat as his eyes glanced towards the stag that had finally made its way through the door and was standing a few feet away. Remus slowly rolled his head backwards, neck straining, until he saw a faint shadow beneath James’ bed. A brown rat scurried out quickly and moved up by his ear, its nose twitching enthusiastically.
“All right, that’s enough!” Remus shoved the dog off him and picked himself up off the floor as quickly as he could, trying not to grit his teeth against the pain. He noticed the dog watching him almost…sympathetically. “Where did you three come from?” He stared between all three animals, almost as though they were going to answer his question. “Right. Well, this was a wonderful prank and I’ll have to remember to thank those three for putting so much effort out for me, but now you have to go.” He felt a growl rising in his chest.
Remus stared balefully at the dog, its eyes almost challenging. It seemed - for some reason Remus couldn’t fathom - that the other animals were taking their cues from him. The growl finally emerged, low and threatening, when the dog made no attempt to move. Remus began to walk to the door to shove them out and down into the common room, when he eyes drifted back to the dog’s.
They’re grey, he thought in amazement. Dogs don’t have grey eyes, but humans do…Sirius does…
“S - Sirius?” he stuttered out. The dog barked loudly and trotted around the room in a small circle, tail straight in the air and curled at the tip, shoulders pushed back, and head held high in pride. The dog - Sirius, his mind corrected - then shook his head and pointed it towards the stag in the corner of the room.
The stag bowed its head in a graceful, regal manner and Remus studied it. Almost immediately, he noticed the faint, darker markings around its eyes.
“James?” he gasped out. The stag stomped its hooves across the floor gently in confirmation, its tail flicking a bit.
There was a loud squeaking from behind him and he turned to look down at the rat. Its brown body trembled with excitement as it began to run circles around Remus’ shoes. The loud squeals echoed through the room as Remus shook his head in astonishment.
“Peter?”
His eyes widened in utter disbelief when the rat leaped up and did a slight flip in midair before darting across the room and climbing up on top of Peter’s bed, where he quickly transformed. The other two followed his lead, Sirius and James appearing where the dog and stag had once stood.
Sirius looked at Remus in apprehension, so much energy coursing through his body it could almost be heard. “So,” he asked cautiously, “what d’you think, Moony?”
Remus promptly fainted.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
But I have the skill, yeah
I have the will, to breathe you in while I can
However long you stay is all that I am
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Part Two