reading: The Illiad
eyes drawn to: dirty things of the unforgiving naturerealizing that: the world does not stop at 4:30am twilights
wanting/needing/NEEDING: all things wonderful; toe-curling; lip-upturning; laughter-enducing; magical; eyelash-blowing; happy-making; forever-promising; and all that goodstuff...

i fall in love randomly.

last night.

this afternoon.

this evening.

it's a sickness.

it must be stopped.

for the sake of my heart,

because my soul already hurts,

throbs.

i can call up any random boy

make him see me.

it's never worth it.

it all ends up full circle.

x

i'll try harder next time... to love you harder

it's good to see you.
i really miss you, madame.

i never realized how much,
until i saw your new hair cut,
and cocky, shit-eating grin.

you look more mature these days.

yesterday, he stood on my feet and told me my big toes are big.

it made me smile.

it made me giggle. in that annoying way i hate.

things to do:

1. finish reading Breaking Dawn
2. take photos of beautiful things that are inspiring
3. begin writing (which I hope this journal will help with)
4. smile more
5. realize i can't change people and make them what i want ( Read more... )

I've never made much of an attempt to understand the things that don't make sense in the world. I've always chosen to ignore the things I can't change, that is, if they aren't close to me. If they are close to me, I've fought as hard as I possibly could in order to change them. It's a sad reality. Even in daily conversations with men, I've been ( Read more... )