Family Ties [Part 25]
Title: Family Ties
Characters (in this chapter): Australia, New Zealand, Japan.
Rating: 12
Warnings: Australian stereotypes (to Brooke's dismay), sibling bickering. Idk.
Summary: Uh, I need to be banned from the kink meme or monsters like this happen? Essentially, Scotland leaves the UK, which gives Northern Ireland an excuse to up and out as well, which leaves England and Wales all alone. Oh yeah, and this somehow leads to World War Three.
The garage was dimly lit. There were probably a million different kinds of poisonous creature in there. The cobwebs in the corners were not reassuring in the slightest.
"C'mon Kat, why're you standing in the door like that?" Brooke called over his shoulder from where he was rummaging around in cardboard boxes. His sister folded her arms and squinted into the darkness.
"There is no way in hell I'm going in there until you change the lightbulb." she deadpanned. Australia quirked a Kirkland eyebrow at her.
"Wimp." he scoffed, turning his back on her.
"I am not." she defended, pouting a little. "It's just everything in your house is out to kill... everything else."
Australia grunted as he shifted a particularly heavy box. "You've got some nasty little buggers yourself, you know." It made a metalic sound as it was put down, and Kat almost wondered what was inside before she decided she probably didn't want to know.
"I have one poisonous spider. You have hundreds."
"Hey now, you've only got to watch out for the Funnel Web and the Redback." he reasoned, digging through yet another box. "But someone like you'd probably get freaked out by the jumping spiders. Like the one on that wall there."
New Zealand screamed and lept back, blue eyes wide and darting all over any walls surrounding her. Finally realising her brother was picking on her again, and that he was sniggering into his hand at her reaction, she turned bright red.
"I hate you so much." she fumed even as Australia clutched at his aching sides and tried not to laugh too loud. That would only raise his chances of getting whacked round the head with a shepherding cane. He heard her footsteps leave, and figured it was going to happen anyway and called after her.
"Oh please, anything but the stick, sis!" he mock-pleaded. "Have mercy on my wayward soul!" When she didn't return immediately, the brunette looked down the corridor with raised brows. "Sis?"
New Zealand stood in the doorway with a kitchen knife.
Australia's hand closed around his knife, in its usual leather sheath on his belt, and he bit his tongue. Kat smirked.
"Say it."
He shook his head.
"You know you want to."
He shook his head harder.
"Come on, it's going to come out eventually."
Brook narrowed his eyes at her. She traced her finger along the edge of the blade, not pressing hard enough to cut. "Oh, what a pretty knife, so threatening, I bet it's the biggest in the room. This is a real knife."
That tore it. "That is not a knife!" Australia exclaimed, leaping to his feet and drawing his own blade, which was not only three inches longer, but also serrated, well cleaned, and shimmered in the dim light. "This is a knife." He glowered at her, deflating a little. "I hate it when you make me say stuff like that."
"And I hate all things with eight legs, thanks to your childhood trauma inducing idiocy." she replied pointedly, striding back into the kitchen to replace the knife. “All’s fair in love and war!”
Australia glowered. “It is until I set dingos on your sheep…”
“What was that?”
“Nothing!”
After a sulky five minutes of silence, New Zealand poked her head back in. “There’s someone coming.” She said with a kind of deadpan expression. Anyone trying to attack her brother in his element was probably an idiot anyway.
“I know, why do you think I’ve been looking for this?” he finally dived into a box, clattering about until he pulled out a sniper rifle and-
“I don’t want to know why you have a grenade launcher, do I.” New Zealand sighed.
“Auntie Ireland got it for me as a present a few years ago.” He grinned. “Said it would take care of my pest problem.” Shouldering both guns, he made his way out of the garage, trailing several kinds of spiders web. New Zealand followed.
“You were going to use it to kill rabbits? Isn’t that a little…” she gestured for the word, though a smile was bringing up the corners of her lips. “… overkill?”
“No kill like the overkill!” he chirped in reply, setting up the sniper rifle in the front window of the house. “Now, where’s the little bugger that’s trespassing on my land…” he peered through the sights. “… well that’s interesting.”
“Who is it?”
“Dunno, I can’t see him.”
The doorbell rang.
“Guess that’s why.” Kat went to get the door, leaving her brother to mutter to himself something along the lines of ‘holy shit that was fast’. Opening the door, she was almost knocked over when someone darted in. Lightning fast, she rugby tackled the intruder to the ground and had him in a strangle hold. Australia came running in.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing in my house you- Japan?” he paused mid-rant to gape at the Asian Nation, who was looking extremely uncomfortable.
“E-excuse my intrusion, Australia-san.” He choked, and New Zealand released his neck, still sitting on his back. “I need somewhere to hide.”
“Hide?” echoed the younger Nation, large eyebrows pulled together in confusion. “But you’re just a financial supporter of the WDF, why would you need to hide?”
“North Korea seems to have, ah, taken offense.” He shifted uncomfortably, and New Zealand finally got off. “She was in front of my house this morning. She’s been intercepting my mail, as well as tampering with my accounts.” In fact, now Brooke looked, Japan didn’t look well. “Illegally.” He added for good measure.
“So, you want to hide here? She’ll just take over your land.” Katherine pointed out. Japan let out a long suffering sigh.
“If she attacks fully, I will have to enter the war.” He admitted. “I’ve been stockpiling weapons for a while now, in case.”
Australia clapped him on the back, causing the smaller man to stumble forward slightly. “Well don’t worry about it, there’s miles of outback for you to hide in, and if Chun Hei decides to pop round…” he tapped his grenade launcher. “I’m ready.”
Notes:
- ... *crawls back in on her knees* I'm so sorry this was late. Idk what happened; I said one day and it became like three.
- I swear to god, Australia's house is terrifying. I would say I'd never go there for fear of my luck making me tread on a spider, but... Nena will probably drag me anyway.
- Australia's pest problem: the introduction of rabbits to the ecosystem in Australia has fucked things up like you wouldn't even believe. It's part of the reason they're so careful these days. Wild rabbits are viewed more as pests than as cute little creatures.
- Chun Hei = North Korea's name. Full name would be Im Chun Hei. Means "Justice and Grace". Hahaha.
- New Zealand plays a mean game of rugby. I mean, look at the other team in that video. How terrified do they look? Moral: Do not underestimate her.
- While Japan and Australia were infamous enemies during WW2 (he has not forgotten Darwin), in the modern day Australia trades more with Asia than he does with the Commonwealth. In fact, they're pretty good friends. Manga is cheap in Australia. Just like it seems to be everywhere except ENGLAND. SOB.
Part 26
Characters (in this chapter): Australia, New Zealand, Japan.
Rating: 12
Warnings: Australian stereotypes (to Brooke's dismay), sibling bickering. Idk.
Summary: Uh, I need to be banned from the kink meme or monsters like this happen? Essentially, Scotland leaves the UK, which gives Northern Ireland an excuse to up and out as well, which leaves England and Wales all alone. Oh yeah, and this somehow leads to World War Three.
The garage was dimly lit. There were probably a million different kinds of poisonous creature in there. The cobwebs in the corners were not reassuring in the slightest.
"C'mon Kat, why're you standing in the door like that?" Brooke called over his shoulder from where he was rummaging around in cardboard boxes. His sister folded her arms and squinted into the darkness.
"There is no way in hell I'm going in there until you change the lightbulb." she deadpanned. Australia quirked a Kirkland eyebrow at her.
"Wimp." he scoffed, turning his back on her.
"I am not." she defended, pouting a little. "It's just everything in your house is out to kill... everything else."
Australia grunted as he shifted a particularly heavy box. "You've got some nasty little buggers yourself, you know." It made a metalic sound as it was put down, and Kat almost wondered what was inside before she decided she probably didn't want to know.
"I have one poisonous spider. You have hundreds."
"Hey now, you've only got to watch out for the Funnel Web and the Redback." he reasoned, digging through yet another box. "But someone like you'd probably get freaked out by the jumping spiders. Like the one on that wall there."
New Zealand screamed and lept back, blue eyes wide and darting all over any walls surrounding her. Finally realising her brother was picking on her again, and that he was sniggering into his hand at her reaction, she turned bright red.
"I hate you so much." she fumed even as Australia clutched at his aching sides and tried not to laugh too loud. That would only raise his chances of getting whacked round the head with a shepherding cane. He heard her footsteps leave, and figured it was going to happen anyway and called after her.
"Oh please, anything but the stick, sis!" he mock-pleaded. "Have mercy on my wayward soul!" When she didn't return immediately, the brunette looked down the corridor with raised brows. "Sis?"
New Zealand stood in the doorway with a kitchen knife.
Australia's hand closed around his knife, in its usual leather sheath on his belt, and he bit his tongue. Kat smirked.
"Say it."
He shook his head.
"You know you want to."
He shook his head harder.
"Come on, it's going to come out eventually."
Brook narrowed his eyes at her. She traced her finger along the edge of the blade, not pressing hard enough to cut. "Oh, what a pretty knife, so threatening, I bet it's the biggest in the room. This is a real knife."
That tore it. "That is not a knife!" Australia exclaimed, leaping to his feet and drawing his own blade, which was not only three inches longer, but also serrated, well cleaned, and shimmered in the dim light. "This is a knife." He glowered at her, deflating a little. "I hate it when you make me say stuff like that."
"And I hate all things with eight legs, thanks to your childhood trauma inducing idiocy." she replied pointedly, striding back into the kitchen to replace the knife. “All’s fair in love and war!”
Australia glowered. “It is until I set dingos on your sheep…”
“What was that?”
“Nothing!”
After a sulky five minutes of silence, New Zealand poked her head back in. “There’s someone coming.” She said with a kind of deadpan expression. Anyone trying to attack her brother in his element was probably an idiot anyway.
“I know, why do you think I’ve been looking for this?” he finally dived into a box, clattering about until he pulled out a sniper rifle and-
“I don’t want to know why you have a grenade launcher, do I.” New Zealand sighed.
“Auntie Ireland got it for me as a present a few years ago.” He grinned. “Said it would take care of my pest problem.” Shouldering both guns, he made his way out of the garage, trailing several kinds of spiders web. New Zealand followed.
“You were going to use it to kill rabbits? Isn’t that a little…” she gestured for the word, though a smile was bringing up the corners of her lips. “… overkill?”
“No kill like the overkill!” he chirped in reply, setting up the sniper rifle in the front window of the house. “Now, where’s the little bugger that’s trespassing on my land…” he peered through the sights. “… well that’s interesting.”
“Who is it?”
“Dunno, I can’t see him.”
The doorbell rang.
“Guess that’s why.” Kat went to get the door, leaving her brother to mutter to himself something along the lines of ‘holy shit that was fast’. Opening the door, she was almost knocked over when someone darted in. Lightning fast, she rugby tackled the intruder to the ground and had him in a strangle hold. Australia came running in.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing in my house you- Japan?” he paused mid-rant to gape at the Asian Nation, who was looking extremely uncomfortable.
“E-excuse my intrusion, Australia-san.” He choked, and New Zealand released his neck, still sitting on his back. “I need somewhere to hide.”
“Hide?” echoed the younger Nation, large eyebrows pulled together in confusion. “But you’re just a financial supporter of the WDF, why would you need to hide?”
“North Korea seems to have, ah, taken offense.” He shifted uncomfortably, and New Zealand finally got off. “She was in front of my house this morning. She’s been intercepting my mail, as well as tampering with my accounts.” In fact, now Brooke looked, Japan didn’t look well. “Illegally.” He added for good measure.
“So, you want to hide here? She’ll just take over your land.” Katherine pointed out. Japan let out a long suffering sigh.
“If she attacks fully, I will have to enter the war.” He admitted. “I’ve been stockpiling weapons for a while now, in case.”
Australia clapped him on the back, causing the smaller man to stumble forward slightly. “Well don’t worry about it, there’s miles of outback for you to hide in, and if Chun Hei decides to pop round…” he tapped his grenade launcher. “I’m ready.”
Notes:
- ... *crawls back in on her knees* I'm so sorry this was late. Idk what happened; I said one day and it became like three.
- I swear to god, Australia's house is terrifying. I would say I'd never go there for fear of my luck making me tread on a spider, but... Nena will probably drag me anyway.
- Australia's pest problem: the introduction of rabbits to the ecosystem in Australia has fucked things up like you wouldn't even believe. It's part of the reason they're so careful these days. Wild rabbits are viewed more as pests than as cute little creatures.
- Chun Hei = North Korea's name. Full name would be Im Chun Hei. Means "Justice and Grace". Hahaha.
- New Zealand plays a mean game of rugby. I mean, look at the other team in that video. How terrified do they look? Moral: Do not underestimate her.
- While Japan and Australia were infamous enemies during WW2 (he has not forgotten Darwin), in the modern day Australia trades more with Asia than he does with the Commonwealth. In fact, they're pretty good friends. Manga is cheap in Australia. Just like it seems to be everywhere except ENGLAND. SOB.
Part 26