why do I get the feeling that i'm blissfully unaware of something right now?

Daisy thinks I'm trying to get better.
I say 'Ugh, I ate so much today!'
'Oh my god I had the nicest blahdeblah yesterday, it was delicious'
'It makes no sense though, because I am eating!'

I eat infront of her.
I tell her what I'm having for dinner.

Sometimes, I think I'm too good at lying. It's my fatal flaw.

Psychiatrist wants to see me on the 11th ( Read more... )

Holy shit.
He just did it.

He broke up with her.

xxx

Daisy has knows about my ED for about a month ago.
She tells me tonight that Louise was asking her if I was eating, and apparently Louise has been in tears about it.
Karl asked today if I was going to eat anything, while we were all in the Harvester together.

Daisy is crushed, I can tell.
For anyone else, choosing a life-shattering disorder over your ( Read more... )

I'm providing myself with a pure grade-a wake up call 
to get my shit together and start relying on myself.
relying on others just ends up with shit hitting the fan
so I'm going to sort myself out.

I GO INSANE
I DEAL WITH IT.

I SEE THINGS
I DEAL WITH IT.

I HEAR THINGS
I DEAL WITH IT.

I FEET FAT
I DONT EAT.

I FEEL STUPID
I GET SMART.

end of the fucking line, ( Read more... )

( triggering, mentions lax abuse )

Todays plan:

breakfast - 1 breadstick - 20 cals
lunch - punnet of blueberries - 25 cals
dinner - not sure yet.

xxx

Mrgh, my computer is telling me that my sound card isn't working, so I can't play any music...
This is irritating.

Anywayyy, mywhitenoise posted this, and it looked fun, so ima repost it. Please fill it in, I wanna know you guys!!

1. Your Middle Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favorite Movie:
5. Favorite Song or Album:
6. Favorite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8 ( Read more... )

I need to get this fat off me.
I need to get this food out of me.
I want to be nothing...

Starting ABC tomorrow. I know it's stupid. I know it's stupid. I KNOW that it is STUPID.

...but this whole fucking lifestyle is stupid.

My whole life is stupid...

I've grown to hate Alfie. And Alice. And college in general.

I want Bekah back. Can I have Bekah back, ( Read more... )

I wonder if anyone will notice that I've lost a stone over the summer.

Nope.

I wonder if anyone will notice that I stopped bothering about brushing and washing my hair.

Nope.

I wonder if anyone will notice that I have to cake on my foundation to cover up the huge bags under my eyes and grey-tinted skin.

Nope.

I wonder if anyone will notice that my hands ( Read more... )