So, I don't know why I keep doing this to myself. I think I'm done, I think I'm better, I think I can finally move on...then, it hits me all over again. I hate this shit. I hate feeling like this; I'm so sick of it. I hate even putting it on this page. But I need a way to vent, so here I am again. I just wish I could over this. I want to be ( Read more... )

So, this is my first update in forever...I guess its because I feel like shit. I don't know what is going on in my life. So, yes, I only write here when I feel like shit. I am not emo by any stretch of the imagination, but I do have my problems from time to time. The thing is, I let them build and build and build. And eventually I write in ( Read more... )

Well, 2:30 am and I am still awake...not the slightest bit tired despite these last few weeks and all the drama, stress, work, and school work they have brought, not to mention that I have an 8 am class to wake up for...woohoo! Yeah, probably not going to go, but oh well. Its psych 101, I'm not worried about that; a retarded monkey could ace the ( Read more... )

I am not sure what to say. I feel like writing, but nothing in my mind is clear enough to put into characters and words. All I know is I don't know. The summer is still a mystery to me; hopefully all will be solved soon. If all else fails, I may just throw all my shit into storage and go to Florida for the whole summer. I wouldn't mind that, ( Read more... )

Ahh, frustration...As I write this, I am ignoring homework because hey, who wants to do that? But that is not what frustrates me. My hand hurts...my head is throbbing thanks to my being genetically proned to migraines...my mind is cloudy...thoughts are jumbled...only one thing is certain and that one truth is the sole cause of my frustration. ( Read more... )

I have no idea what to do. I'm confused; not only on my own accord, but also because others are confused. This time in life is unbelievable. I have no idea where I'm going to live for the summer, no idea how I'm going to keep my scholarship, or how I'm going to get the money to do all I hope to accomplish during the summer, not to mention pay ( Read more... )

If only I knew how to prove the truth to someone. I thought I did; I thought I had done and said all the right things to show how I feel. I thought being there and making sacrifices showed how I truly felt. But I guess all the time, words, and actions in the world won't convice them if they don't want to believe it.

EVERYTHING ( Read more... )

Tired but unable to sleep
My mind races...
Will she, won't she?
Who knows what she'll choose,
Or whats best for everyone?
Surely not me...
Am I best for her?
Is she best for me?
Or is there someone else for both of us?
My mind is clouded and foggy...
I don't know what makes me happy...
I thought I did, maybe I was wrong.

Ah, confusion at its finest. I would give anything for the bliss of understanding. My mind is a giant dust storm of swirling thoughts and emotions that I can neither organize nor figure out. Terrible memories from the past have decided to come back and haunt me while new problems arise just to add to the gigantic weight on my shoulders and I ( Read more... )