"Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too."

~ Pablo Neruda

Finally ended it a little over a month ago. That toxic poison of inseparable pain and pleasure. Part of my heart feels empty and dull.

But I need to pull the thorn out. That was deeply cutting me open from the inside.

I couldn't wait for him, for I ( Read more... )

Embracing my darkness so that I can destroy it from the inside.

I'm lost and alone.

Solitude is a silent storm that breaks down all our dead branches;
Yet it sends our living roots deeper into the living heart of the living earth.

~ Kahlil Gibran

Love. Gratitude. Wonder. Gentleness. Bravery. Vulnerability. Truth. Patience. Humility.

Resolution: Make more art... Think less, express more.

Sometimes I naturally become overwhelmed by all of the energy of both my external and internal worlds. Until recently, this manifested into neuroticism, depression, and anxiety. I trapped everything inside and made myself suffer because of the lack of always living in the present. But now I've ( Read more... )

I used to listen to music all the time and watch so many movies. Art kept my spirit burning.

Now I don't. And my soul is withering away.

Maybe I'll find happiness again if I start them up again.

It's one of those nights where I just listen to film scores and pretend that life is as magical as my childhood self thought it was.

Until reality eventually returns to wash away my expectations of life that were built upon daydreams, fantasies, and fictional stories.

I've spent my whole life dreaming and imagining that I don't know how to live ( Read more... )

I've been having an existential crisis for the last 6 months. Sometimes I feel like I can't get out of it.

I am pretty sure I have depression. And have had it for a while.

It really sucks.

It's such an internal condition that just infests your soul, the core of who you are.