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[hitch21]

lately I have just been so unhappy. I'm trying to fill the void with things that distract me. I've been drinking too much and wandering around with someone that I don't even really know. Maybe that's why I do it. With him, I hide behind this bizarre identity and just completely forget how miserable I really am. I know that I'm being used, but I don

Comments

[emjdork]

i think you should write a book. just put it all out there. regardless of whether it will scare others or yourself. you have to read the book, andrea's voice over break. and you have to cry. you have to express the emotion as you feel it, even if you express it and you still feel like shit, or feel shittier than before, i feel like constantly pretending you're happy is reaking havoc on your subconscious more than you realize. obviously you cant mope around all the time but you have to let yourself do it sometimes. ive cried almost everyday for weeks on end because i dont even know my mother. she's still alive but everything i have ever known about her that makes her HER, is gone. every holiday, wedding, birth, celebration is completely altered from now until i die. i hate that, and the majority of the time i'm a huge baby about it, but fuck it because im sick of pretending like everything is OfuckingK because it's not.and you should be sick of it too. next time you and i hang out over break, i want to talk about real shit. no talking

[anonymous]

you are so loved.
i am thinking of you tonight.

--olga