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it would probably help
my sense of sanity to stop thinking of myself as "playing normal" and start just thinking of it as "being" normal. Whatever normal is. Last night I had a perfectly lovely evening hanging out with P & his boyfriend & a couple of his friends down in foggy, artsy Venice - a more moneyed, sedate conversation evening than I'm used to, but rewarding ( Read more... ) -
A post at bedtime
Altho truth be told, most of my posts are done at bedtime-ish ( Read more... ) -
Meme vs Ambien = who will win!
So naturally, it's time for a meme! Stolen from lady chreebomb, who always knows what a fella needs. x ( Read more... ) -
Madman, heal thyself
I had a little attack of crazy earlier tonight (no other way to describe it). I could practically feel myself pinching my nose and toes-first diving into the narrow channel of bonkersville...so weird. My perception's up, but my control is still wobbly as fuck. I sort of rescued myself from it, but not before a stricken visit to the grocery store, ( Read more... ) -
what is going on?
Last night I was driving home behind a car with the license plate
ARG M8Y
Tonight I was driving home and saw a car with the license plate
AHY M8T
It has to mean something.
Besides I'm never leaving the house again, that is. -
Broken Open, pt. xxv
Today at work my boss sat down to self-satisfyingly sing a song of praise about his new missus (shes #3). He raves about her goodness, her patience and her inspiring understanding. All at once it was clear to me what he was saying -- that she makes him better, which in turn makes him actually better, which makes her better, which...and so on. It's ( Read more... ) -
First daylight LJ post!
Usually my brain is too rusty to work at this hour. It may be yet, but I'm up and I've checked all my morning webthites and still have 2 hours before school. Random thoughts/wishes/desires ( Read more... ) -
O mighty LJ
what a perfect distraction from studying for my anthropology test ( Read more... ) -
Another powerful day, then the wake
that follows. I'm trying to balance all my a-mode taking care of myself (meds, eating good, rest, peace o mind) with working on the b-mode stuff that clogs & crowds its way into the forefront of my mind - stuff about love, and relationships, and longing, and loneliness. The-rapist gave me some 'tough talk' today about how important it is to ( Read more... ) -
So far so good
haha, I know I'm sort of kidding myself - it's Night 2 of meddies and I don't feel too bad (slightly stiff neck is all, perhaps entirely unrelated?) other than the low-level anxiety of it. I'll see how I feel when it ramps up and the meds are actually sort of kicking in - I guess in the next two or three weeks. Already feeling slightly less ( Read more... )