(Untitled)

[sedately]

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Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

[Howard's life tends to be full of fear. The FAYZ will do that to you. Whether it's the niggling fear of never having enough food, or the more explicit fears of being eaten alive by insects, somehow fear always seems to get in the way of any total relaxation.

Never is that more the case than when he wakes up from a nightmare, finds ants in the bed, and can't find anything to snack on. It's a culmination of all his anxieties building on each other. He goes out to the couch in front of The Warehouse in his pajamas and barefeet, trying to decide between going to the mess hall or finding a can of RAID.]

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

"Howard?" There's a knock and a familiar voice at the door -- he's not sure Howard is awake yet, but if he's not, Zouichi will just be on his way.

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

Howard jumps about a foot and a half at the sound.

For a moment he seriously considers ignoring the knock at the door, because really, he doesn't want to have to explain to the most fearless - and he means that in the most literal sense - person he knows "oh, I had a awful no-good bad dream and couldn't find anything to binge myself sick on so I'm going to stay up all night fighting off a panic attack like a boss". That doesn't sound even remotely put-together.

But Zouichi might have heard the sound of him startling, so he steadies his breath and hands, wipes off the cold sweat with a dishtowel, and opens the door. "It's like, four in the morning. It's still dark out."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

"I thought you might be putting in another late night, sorry. There's some kind of alien running around in the area, biting people in their sleep. You haven't seen it, have you?"

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

"If that's a joke, it's really not funny," he says, looking like he means it. He doesn't need something legitimate to worry about on top of all this. He takes a deep, shaky breath and wrings his hands together. "That's not why you're here, is it?"

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

Zouichi frowns as he looks at Howard, who's obviously trying to control the fear that is evident in every aspect of his body language. "What's wrong?"

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

"Nothing. Nothing's wrong. I just can't sleep and I have a shift at Med Bay in three hours and I think Albert emptied the pantry and nothing's wrong." His voice gets a bit high-pitched. He sounds like he's trying to convince himself much more than Zouichi. He rubs his forehead with his palm. "Do you want to come in? I want to lock the door."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

Oookay. That sounds like something is definitely wrong.

"Sure," he says, stepping inside. Now would probably be a bad time to remark on Howard's peculiarities about locking the door. "Are you sure you want to show up in Medical on no sleep? Maybe you can call in sick."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

He does the four locks on the door, checking them twice, before slumping back on the couch. "I already got a few hours. Just woke up and I think Albert moved stuff or hid it or took it...anyway, I don't need to call in sick, I just need a minute."

He covers his face and breathes deep before getting back up and checking the locks again. "Why're you here again?"

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

"Right, okay." Howard doesn't look like he needs a minute, he looks like he needs a day off. Or a year. "He hid things? Does he do that often?"

Zouichi shrugs. "I don't know. You know I do a lot of night shifts. I thought you might be awake for some reason." He pauses. "I was worried."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

"No. Maybe. I don't know. I can't find the spare food. The pantry's empty. It's not where I put it." He grinds his teeth, breathing a bit shallowly and too quickly. "Why were you worried? I'm usually asleep now."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

"Call it a hunch," Zouichi says, trying the humor route. "I sensed a disturbance in the Force, as if someone had moved the spare food in the pantry, and then didn't tell you about it."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

"Heh." It's the most unconvincing laugh ever, but he tries. "You sure it wasn't that microchip you supposedly put in me?"

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

"Stop blowing my plausible deniability," he says.

"...so, is it just things not being where you expected them to be? Because somehow, I don't think a little bump in the daily routine is enough to keep a full-fledged medic at night. Even one with a questionable bedside manner."

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[i_sell_drugs]

"It's not just things, it's the food stash," he says, placing special emphasis on the last words, since apparently Zouichi isn't getting just how important that is. Of course he wouldn't, he doesn't have to eat. "I raid it sometimes if I'm not sleeping well. I just...there were ants in my room. I had a dream about zekes."

He feels pathetic disclosing that, like a little kid wandering into his parent's room in the middle of the night with a monster under the bed. Without even thinking about it he's pulled a pillow from the couch onto his lap and is a bit curled around it.

Re: Howard Bassem | Gone | 3

[zouichi]

He frowns. Ah. The FAYZ again. But Howard never seems to want to talk about the FAYZ; information comes in fits and starts, hard to put together in concrete form. Howard seems so nonchalant, so put together, that it's easy to forget that for months, he was a short, scared teenager who didn't know how long the food would hold out... or whether the powers that be in the FAYZ would decide it was time for another murderous bid for power.

"'Zekes'? Are those like the talking coyotes?"

Howard's physical withdrawal doesn't escape Zouichi, but he doesn't push it. He merely sits down on the other end of the couch, waiting for Howard to decide how much he wants to tell.