So for the first time in my life practically, I was dating a guy that I was so happy with, the thought of hooking up with or even TALKING TO another guy didn't cross my mind. And we all know how not me that is. Annnnd of course today something happens to make me think it's over on his end ( Read more... )

So she's finally here to stay. He stayed here a few nights ago and he's still the only person I can sleep next to. He checked his voicemail when he woke up and told me that he got his house. And he expected me to be happy about it. He had just spent another night with me and wanted me to be thrilled about his life with his new wife. I haven't ( Read more... )

Well, I fucked that one up.

Jarod and I went to dinner two nights ago. I was so nervous that I took 3 shots before I went, had a martini and 4 glasses of wine there, then went to his house and had a mixed drink and another shot. Needless to say I got sick ( Read more... )

The fact that tomorrow he's going to be in the same country makes me cringe. Let alone the fact that he's going to be in the same county as me.

And the fact that she will be, too.

Do you know what I realized? WHAT I FUCKING REALIZED??? This goes RIGHT along with the whole he's my Big theory. And as soon as I remembered that I stopped crying. I just have to fucking get over it. Move on with my life and it'll all work out like it's supposed to ( Read more... )

I love how none of my "friends" will even listen to me cry when I need them to the most.

I just heard that Jarod is getting married. Which is kinda funny because on August 1st he told me he was coming home and wanted me back and so on and so on. I'd like to say I'm OK with it, but I'm not. But I'm also not ready to kill myself over it like I might have been in the past ( Read more... )

Jarod's coming home next month.

Last night I made out with a guy I don't even like. That's how lonely I'm starting to get.

I'm not gonna lie, though. It felt good to kiss someone, again.