I had 18 friends come out to celebrate my birthday on Friday. That's never happened to me before. Other than early childhood, I can't remember friends ever taking me out for my birthday. Not that I had a lot of friends. The happiness of this event has literally brought tears for my eyes as a fond memory ( Read more... )

Things have changed so much since January. I've been skydiving, hang gliding, flown a plane, and made a lot of friends. It has been so much fun. Artscape is coming up and I have been thinking about what a Jerk (with a capital J) I was.

About a year ago, the VP of my organization visited my office and I joyously told him how happy I was about CJ. I saw him again today and said "Unfortunately it didn't work out."

I'm feeling particularly contemplative.

Even after all this time, I still think of CJ. Some bad, but mostly the good. She opened my eyes to some things and I'm not sure how those will affect my life. Generally speaking, from each girlfriend I learn more about myself. That, and each one changes me in some way. I have thoughts I doubt I will ever share with someone else ... I wonder ( Read more... )

Wow. Things have really changed in the past year. I'm single again, unfortunately. Christmas last year wasn't a bundle of joy, but I do miss it some. I've managed to avoid most of the holiday music, to the point where I can enjoy singing along when I do come across it ( Read more... )

I seem to be having one of those days where my mind is running in a million different directions. I think about past relationships and in some ways am trying to "get over it." And yet I still have lingering thoughts. Someone I tried to be friends with couldn't get over our past. Someone who I thought I was friends with decided that I wasn't ( Read more... )

Today on tv ( Read more... )

I was thinking last night about how I miss Marlena. I care for her a lot and I was never able to communicate that to her very well. But that was limited in me to friendship. I didn't feel the things that made me ache for her. And I think that she was so willing to try to be in a relationship, to settle for someone who was not right, that it ( Read more... )

Silence
Silence of love lost
Silence of hearts broken
The deafening roar of silence

It was rather ironic that Marlena reached out to me without having seen the previous entry. We had dinner a few times and talked. She told me some things that really meant a lot to me, the day she had to put Mea down and the story of the Rainbow Bridge, she apologized for ... I think the word she used was overburdening ... me, and she said she ( Read more... )