back in mn. starting life over again. how many times can i start over in one fucking year. amazing. looking for places to live sucks, and looking for jobs does too. good news: i have a new fake boyfriend who is from new zealand. i left him a love note in berkeley and now we're being penpals. he's the shit. anyways, as usual, my boyfriends are fake ( Read more... )

sometimes total strangers just hit me with this wave of wonder and amazement and i am left shaking at the knees, wanting to run away from them so i can breath again. instantaneous crushes. and usually these people that knock me off my feet are women. and then i feel like a freak because i have fallen in love with a complete stranger. and then i get ( Read more... )

and then out of this crap shoot winter land. fucking cold. this is the time when everyone starts to really go crazy because it's still in the single digits and it should be spring. so i'm just going to go get spring early, here i go west west west, where it's green. i wish i didn't have to do this last week. oh well, almost DONE

and then i will be moved out of my house, and i will be en route to the west coast travels. thank god. this fuckin 9-5 gig will be over and the benefits of doing it for six months will be paying off! i have been freaking out about dissembeling my room. it has been my haven all winter, and now i need to destroy it! ahhhh! i just have to remember ( Read more... )

neon yellow again! yesssssss. it's been two years since this color and that is way too long. this time, instead of rocking the fauxhawk (curtousy of nat miller in the smfa school store), i am rocking a long, full out mowhawk mullet, or mullhawk, (curtousy of sheela iris) which stands on end at all times due to the damage done to the quality of my ( Read more... )

first a dream yesterday that matty was on dope. then a dream this morning about evan being super wasted and out of control. he was hiding out, because he had told sarah that he was leaving for new orleans, but he only said that to avoid her. i found him at a bar with marshall, who he used to shoot up with (in the dream). he and marshall followed me ( Read more... )

yep new boots, for a new god damn week. tall and white. like glasses of milk. on my feet. this week will be better than last. i promise you that. i promise you, god damn it. i hate my computer life because it reminds me of my old life in which i am not a part of anymore. old friends who i haven't seen in a year. and this fucking picture on live ( Read more... )

same thing every day, bundle up, go to work, feel wierd and disconnected from everyone around me. my breasts feel like water balloons that have been drained and a few fatty cells are left to linger in these wierd skin pouches protruding from my chest. ........ hungry all the time but don't buy food and so keep loosing wieght. obviously still being ( Read more... )

boring, annoyed, and lonely is how ive been feeing. annoyed with my house, that panther dubbed "the feelings house" (i condone that name completely). annoyed with all the good byes i said this week, meghan, dylan and sven, which leads to feeling lonely, especially being at home with out meg and dylan there. whatever. i'm going to try to cuddle ( Read more... )

here i am in wisconsin working on a farm powerwashing porches and planting gardens. it is pretty awesome i can come out here and work when i'm broke, which is the case now. the whole Ohio trip which started off very fun and silly turned completely serious when i realized that i was broke and didn't have enough money for rent this friday. so we had ( Read more... )