Just updating because I have this fear that LJ will eventually delete this.

Gave up on recovery a few years ago. I just keep this around because I love _realthin.

My weight sucks right now. I got divorced; puked away 60 lbs in the process. Still too fat and unhappy about it.

Well, it's been a month since I've updated. Usually, that means I've been doing poorly. That is half true. I did pretty well for the first couple of weeks this past month and made it down to a new current low weight. But due to a string of events, I've been eating rather crap lately. In total for June, I've gained at least half a pound... probably ( Read more... )

last weigh-in: 188
today’s weigh-in: 182.8
-5.2

current goal: lose 25lbs
lbs to go: 19.8

Weigh in today was surprisingly pleasant. I knew that I’d done pretty well eating-wise, but I hadn’t expected it to be this good. My scale got a bit iffy on me though - it came up with 2 different numbers before consectively setting on 182.8. It hasn’t done ( Read more... )

Every addiction, she said,
was just a way to treat this same problem.
Drugs or overeating or alcohol or sex,
it was all just another way to find peace.
To escape what we know.
Our education. Our bite of the apple.
-Choke

Today I had a very important interview for an internship and I got it! I start in two months. Enough time to lose some ( Read more... )

Fat chick enters store and then leaves immediately.

Dad: What's wrong?
Fat chick: I'm too fat and poor to shop here.
-overheardinnewyork.com

Today I did well. This is my ‘first day back’ if you will. But not only did I achieve my eating goals of the past… I also incorporated exercise in a way that I never did before. I woke up this morning and ( Read more... )

If I lose 1.5-2lbs a week from this weight on,
it will take me 9-12 months to reach a point
where I am actually thin.

“Starting tomorrow” did not exactly hold true. I have made some strides. On Saturday I worked out for half an hour. I plan to do the same later today. I have also been eating slightly better, but not well enough to lose weight. I ( Read more... )

# of lbs lost since Jan. 1st: 21.4
# gained since Jan. 1st: 5
Total loss: 16.6

During April, I lost a total of 1.4 lbs. That is pathetic. I have really gone off track this past month. After looking through some other weight loss journals and spending much of my afternoon revisiting the thinspiration communities of my starvation days, I have ( Read more... )

Well, despite how triggered I was in that last entry, nothing has come of it. Yesterday I had pizza, fries, and ice cream. Lots of ice cream. I am sick, so exercising and not binging (or at least not eating ice cream) is nearly impossible ( Read more... )

I have had a bad week & 1/2... or more. Weigh day was terrible. The scale claimed that I gained 8 lbs in one week. That cannot be physically possible. I blame being bloated and still full from binging the night before. (My period and lack of for almost a week really fucked things up.) Afraid to weigh myself this Monday since it's already Thursday ( Read more... )

I haven't been back on track for very long although I have lost a nice amount of weight :) (somehow). I am now 20lbs less than I was when I started trying to lose weight in January ( Read more... )