Where did all my energy go?

please die

It was a little after four in the morning. How he managed to find all his clothes in the dark, I can't remember. Left me in bed, went into the bathroom and straightened himself up, got back out and gathered his things. I hastily got up stark naked, sober now, stood in front of him. The only light came from the wifi router to my right. I wondered ( Read more... )

You quietly exclaimed, "You never told me that," like it was something you had a right to know. I would have told you, but you're never there. You always let chance run its course when it comes to us; I need more than that. We can't just say that is where we are without giving ourselves the time to get there. I know I have your mind, but sometimes ( Read more... )

"Why are you doing this?" she asked, not expecting an answer ( Read more... )

I can't even begin. It's not about anyone deserving anything, but that's the easiest way I can come up with for me to be able to deal with this: I deserve this. This was what I wanted. But of course that's not making it much easier. We were going to spend our lives together. Now my future is nothing.

It really sucks being the girl that never gets chosen ( Read more... )

I held you at an arm's length, but in my mind, I was begging you to come closer. Even as you briefly held my hand, I merely laughed and left mine limp, yet hoped that you would not stop trying to convince me. But once I fell asleep next to you, I found myself clutching you at the waist tightly when I woke up, my sleep-deprived brain finally ( Read more... )

One of my friends would have the presence of mind to tell you that I love you. While in the car on the way home tonight, I was thinking about that: I wished a little bit that I would die early so you could know sooner that I love(d) you.

That is how big a coward I am. Hahaha

and I still haven't gotten what I want. I know this is a beautiful thing, because it is so damn ugly. It is disappointing. It's everything that could have gone wrong. They say all the best writing comes from that, right ( Read more... )