shit I don't want this year of college to be over just yet, and I don't want to do all this work I have left.

Last night I had a dream that I married my ex-boyfriend. It seemed to be a pretty chill, spur-of-the moment wedding, but I did get to ride a horse. His ex (current girl in real life) Clara was there ... I think he broke up with her to come marry me, because I called him and asked him to or something like that. Awkward, but maybe not as awkward as ( Read more... )

i'm so miserable and lonely here. i want friends. i want someone. as in someone to love and to love me. or at least like a decent amount. i need company/companionship/whatever. i need something. my life is so lacking. i'm so depressed today ( Read more... )

it's not that i'm not over you, it's that i really loved you, and that's not going to go away.
i thought it wouldn't for you, either.

dude i'm accepted to NYU i'm so fucking stoked!!!!

oh my god, i'm a fatass. somehow i can't even afford food and i still manage to eat a shitload and be fat. i don't know how much i weigh but it's definitely way too much. ahh. i'm working out with jenni at 4, thank god. that will be my third time this entire year, i am pathetic, ha ( Read more... )

i look so tall and skinny on the outside of the elevator doors at work, but then i get in and on the inside of the doors i see how fat i really am, and hate myself for not taking the stairs.

i totally gained at lollapalooza. i haven't weighed myself yet, but i totally gained. drank like 4 beers the whole time so that wasn't much, and then around 4 shots of tequila. THEN i smoked a shitload of weed all weekend, one night chris and i were really high all of a sudden and went to walgreens and bought a bunch of candy haha. we ate out 1 or ( Read more... )

I'm starting the JUDDDD diet. The calculator told me 1959 cals on high days and 359 on low, but I'm going to ease myself into it kinda and aim for 1600 on high and 600 on low, and hopefully work my way into the recommended.

Today I've had:

1 c. Post Raisin Bran w/ 1/4 c. 2% milk = 210 caloriesand I'm planning on not eating lunch and having ( Read more... )

i have a rat's nest in the back of my hair that no matter how i tug and wriggle my fingers through, i can't get loose. maybe i should pick up a brush; it's what my mom always says, but i hate seeing my loose hairs fall out as i comb through, like fallen, discarded soldiers ( Read more... )