LJ Idol, Season 10 Second Chance, Week 2: Front Porch

[i_17bingo]

Comments

[beldarzfixon]

This was fun! And I like "watching the universe go by" (the phrase, and porch-sitting in general)

[i_17bingo]

The trick is not to let the universe get to you when it does go by.

[alycewilson]

This was fun! I love seeing this sort of battle from an outside perspective. I also like that you kept the mood light, even at the end when it seemed like it would turn darker.

[i_17bingo]

Yeah, when I was writing it, I was really self-conscious about bringing the mood down. I'm glad I didn't.

[magazhchi]

I enjoyed the POV and this was smartly done. It took me sometime to realise that this was last weeks world *smiles* It made for good read.

[i_17bingo]

Expect to see this world a lot in the weeks coming up. It, and Rafaela in particular, are some of my favorite things to write about.

[fodschwazzle]

I like how little you need to do to keep this wrapped around the characters you use regularly. You've been building it and running it long enough that you can make occasion to do things like this:

“Why not?” Jim insisted. “Bears walk on two legs.”

“Only sometimes,” Bill countered. “Like when they're mad.”

Which is phenomenal and allows for some pretty cool external insight into what Rafaela has to live with on the regular.

[i_17bingo]

One thing I'm shooting for is that what goes on in the background of Rafaela's adventures should be interesting too.

[eternal_ot]

This was FUNtastic :) I really enjoyed the third person perspective and I laughed out loud at “He looked plenty mad to me.” Good work!

[i_17bingo]

Thanks! It was fun to see things from Jim and Bill's point of view.