144 visions of the future // "I must be late; I just missed the train to the afterlife."

[i_themagician]

It's been one year, three months, two weeks, and three days since I arrived here quite intentionally. I suppose that's shorter than some have been here but longer than many, and I've yet to leave even once. I don't keep it a secret that I am deceased, but while the fact that my life is over doesn't bother me at all, there are some aspects of being

Comments

private to Clow; strikes actually private

[moresake]

It must be strange to think that all of your plans no longer need your input, hmm? I find it odd; and yet, I trust Watanuki and the rest of them. As I'm sure you do as well.

I think you've done a good job of moving forward. Here only a year and yet you've got your hands in everything.

...You didn't tell me it was your intention to come here, afterward. I almost didn't think you were going to exist at all.

{private} strikes not there

[i_themagician]

I don't know if it's strange, but there's a definite feeling of satisfaction at having finished something, don't you think? Of course I trust them; things would have gone much differently otherwise.

So you've noticed. I do find it a little odd that some of the things I'm involved in were started by people who just want to go back.

I wasn't certain that I'd exist it would be possible, so I didn't want to get anyone's hopes up.

{private} still no strikes

[moresake]

Satisfaction is a good word for it, I think. (And that was rhetorical, I know you trust them. Probably more than they trust themselves.)

Well, most people don't sit around and twiddle their thumbs all day, even if they want to go home. It's good to have hobbies or employment.

And yet I beat you here, or some version of me did. I'm glad.

{private} strikes SO not there.

[i_themagician]

We did well, if I may say so. (You're probably right, there.)

I think that's what I would call my jobs: hobbies that happen to make money. Even if they didn't I'd probably still do them.

That version of you still had some other things to do at home, though. So I wouldn't say you beat me. I still died first.

1/3

[soulofocean]

So it's true, after all...

2/3

[soulofocean]

Well, I didn't exactly know. I mean, I guessed. But after that conversation I was almost sure...

I'm sorry, Mister Clow.

3/3

[soulofocean]

I can understand how you'd feel apart from all of us who have things to do back home. But... "isolated" is a pretty strong word, isn't it? I wonder if it's the same for him.

[i_themagician]

No need to apologize; nothing's wrong about it. It simply is.

Well, it's a strong feeling, but not so strong that I'd say "cut off from." Not to discourage people from talking about it - in fact, the one thing that the living and the dead have in common is that coming here presents a change. It's merely that how exactly things change is different depending on one's circumstances, and I was wondering if I was alone in my perspective.

[i_themagician]

Any reason why? It seems as though the answer is obvious, but knowing that one should move on doesn't seem like reason enough to me to actually want to.

[i_themagician]

You know, I feel the same way.

[absinthe_eyed]

"Unfinished business"? That makes us sound like ghosts.

It doesn't matter how we feel. We can't go home; if we leave the City, all we can anticipate is whatever--if anything--comes after death.

[i_themagician]

"Things you were going to do that you didn't get around to because you died but would like to get back to if it were possible" seemed a bit long-winded.

While that's true, I intentionally did not mention the practicality of the matter because it has a tendency to cloud the truth. If someone would like to go home, being unable to will do nothing to change that and failing to admit as much to themselves will only make it worse.

[absinthe_eyed]

That is cumbersome.

I think practicality is more likely to clarify than to cloud. Coming to terms with our inability to go home--and the fact that we'll never have an opportunity to complete anything we left undone in life--will help us let go of things we can never change and concentrate on what the future holds for us.

If we have futures.

[i_themagician]

While I agree, I think people need to come to that conclusion on their own. Even though I actually did finish everything I meant to in life and outwardly accepted what death really means, it has taken me a while to actually come to terms with moving on. When I did, it had nothing to do with what I thought I should feel. I can only imagine that I had an easy time of it compared to others here.

We must have futures; whether or not we have futures as ourselves is a different matter, but I can hardly imagine that so much consciousness and energy would simply disappear. I suppose we're getting into philosophy and religion now, though.

right up his alley <3

[arrogantdancer]

Only the fool believes death to be an ending, surely~.

it even says in his name~ "Fool" is capitalized for omnomnom tarot card references.

[i_themagician]

He's right; it is the end of the Fool.

<333 Tod doesn't care, but I do!

[arrogantdancer]

And what of a wiser man? Is it his end as well, I wonder~.

[i_themagician]

I think that it is necessarily his beginning, actually.