guess what i'm doing for my birthday!

i'm gonna see REM, Modest Mouse and the National play at the tweeter center.

awesome.

Ever since I completed step 3 in AA (paraphrased--surrendering to a higher power and trusting that they'll help guide you), I've been experiencing all these little coincidences that seem terrible at first, but are turning out to be blessings in disguise.

Tuesday was Emilee's birthday, and I was really excited for her. I called her first thing in the ( Read more... )

There is so much going on right now, and I'm not sure what I should be feeling.

This whole past weekend I've been really depressed. Have you ever been in one of those situations where you can feel it eating you alive from the inside? It tears of piece by tiny piece and chews it slowly. Each and every day a little bit more of you is dead, and there's ( Read more... )

Yeah I know I said I was going to bed, then I decided to check my friends page and... well, you know how it is ( Read more... )

I was getting really bored with my hair and, really my overall appearance. It's not that I thought I looked bad, it's just that I've been doing the same type of style over and over for years with only minor alterations. It's not that I lack the creativity to create new styles, it's that I never feel adventurous enough to attempt them on myself. So ( Read more... )

i'm sorry i fell out of contact with everybody for so long. i don't really leave the house that much anymore. basically, i go to school for most of the day, then i go to aa meetings once or twice a week, then more often than not i'll spend weekends in boston at my bf's apartment.

other than that, i really just hang around the house doing whatever. ( Read more... )

Yup, it's been forever. I have been checking myspace, facebook and email, but for some reason totally forgot about LJ.

So, back in school. 5 days a week 7:45-2:30. Taking cosmetology.
Weekends in Boston with the boy.
Recording again ( http://www.myspace.com/jezebeldemonic ) "I'm Fine" is the newest one.

Nothing else really noteworthy at this point. I' ( Read more... )

i had a miscarriage today. it hurt like hell. part of me is glad that i didn't have to deal with a pregnancy by myself on top of everything else that's going on, but i wanted to keep the baby. i really did. so the other part of me is depressed. there are a lot of emotions right now, basically. i'm not sure i know how to deal with them all.

i might be pregnant. he doesn't know. i have no way to tell him.

i love you more than anything in the world. it kills me that i can't see you, that i can't feel your arms around me, hear you breathing next to me as i fall asleep tonight. sleeping in that jail cell was the coldest experience of my life, not only physically but emotionally. it was the first night in a long time that i'd spent by myself, without ( Read more... )