Good Lord, my next door neighbor was friends with Jeffrey Dahmer. They were in the same institution and stoof. He's on parole now [my neighbor, Dahmer is dead], I wonder what he did...

Holy hell. I have a cold. I thought Dayquils are supposed to not make you sleepy?? My birthday is on Monday. Buy me presents because I'm poor. I might move to SLAUGHTER STREET!! I love that name. :] Ummm I'm dizzy. The End.

I gots a new tattoo. It's on my arm and I only paid twenty clams for it. It's that dude from the vietnam picture holding a gun to lady liberty's head and she's holding her face like shes crying and it says all systems fail around it. it's hot. and gonna be in a tattoo magazine ( Read more... )

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATT! :]

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I'm gonna shit myself. Attractive, you say?

my niece keeps calling me up from my mom's cell telling me in a gremlin voice stupid shit like, "I can scratch my head with my foot." I'm tired. OH GOD THE PHONES RINGING AGAIN. Joe should be getting out on Monday. I gotta call his mom and bullshit her so she drops the charges. boooo.

just my luck, i look over at the tv and see two guys lathering up in shower together...and it's supposed to be an insurance commercial??

Hahaha I'm an asshole, I got my brother mad drunk I rule. I was all like you can't chug vodka the way melissa can...and well, it turns out...he can't. he couldn't even drive and that's really bad for him. and now i'm bored. and the tv is speaking russian. my tonsil hurts.