1.

[il_deucedly]

Hoorjay. More freshman and another roommate. Let's see how long this one lasts.

Oh well. Onwards and upwards.

YOUR ATTENTION, FRESHMEN OF THE FEMININE PERSUASION. Hi, hello, welcome to hell, if any of you need help finding your dorms or unpacking or breaking in your mattresses, I'd be more than willing to offer my services. Call me Duke, and

Comments

[wrathfulpawn]

...What kind of name is Duke.

[il_deucedly]

The kind you ought to remember, cos you just might be screaming it later.

What's yours, gorgeous?

[wrathfulpawn]

Why? You don't seem very special to me.

Excuse me? Call me Kadaj from now on.

[il_deucedly]

Appearances are deceiving like that. I'm very, very special.

Kadaj. That's a lovely name.

You new here?

[alignedstars]

Is this place really all that bad?

[il_deucedly]

Sugar, you have no idea.

[grandgirlwonder]

Well hello there, Duke! Feel free to come around and break in my mattress for me. I usually do it myself, but I get bored jumping on the bed without any company.

[gilded_hymn]

That's not what he meant, dumbass.

[grandgirlwonder]

You tryin' to start something? Because if you are, then you picked the wrong girl to mess with! With a little bit of this and a little bit of that, POW, I'll punch your lights out! >=[

[gilded_hymn]

No, I'm trying to tell you that you missed the point. He's offering sex, not jumping around like a five-year-old.

[abessives]

Unfortunately.

[il_deucedly]

Hey there, sunshine. How's tricks?

[abessives]

I'd tell you, but then that might start up some sort of conversation between the two of us, and we both know where that leads.

[il_deucedly]

Don't be like that. I swear I didn't know she was your mom.

[sugarpinkfairy]

Hell? I thought I was in purgatory because it looked a lot nicer...

[il_deucedly]

It's really a very clever ploy like that.