okay so i look up to u and wally liek ur my brothers except not since my brothers gay lol. But i need ur help anyways.Ben and i have been fighting a lot lately and i dont know what to say to him anymore because we always end up in a fight of some kind. I love him deeply and hes that one guy for me i can tell but all we do if fight and i can't stay ( Read more... )

so i have to choose soccer or ben and a concert. I dont want to let down anyone but i have to. My coach doesn't want me to miss a practice because we have to have 5 practices under our belt before we can play in a scrimmage. And if i dont go thursday then i can't go to the scrimmage on saturday or monday. now saturday i can't go because i have to ( Read more... )

i dont deserve him at all. I'm not good enoughto be in his life. I mean i'm emotional and can't explain why i am sometimes. :( i'm a horrible girlfriend. I want to be with him all the time but i can't because i work and he works and i play soccer and he goes to his sisters thingys. we fight a lot now and i hate it. we did better when we were away ( Read more... )

i hope my dad or i die.I live in a sexist family because russel gets to do everything because hes the guy and can't get pregnant. My dad doesn't understand that i know how to take care of myself. I dont need him to tell me wats right and whats wrong i know already. hes gotta trust me but he doesn't because i'm his little girl screw that shit i'm ( Read more... )

he pisses me off so bad. I haven't even done anything and he got mad at me.he uses the things i tell him against me and its not fair or very nice. He says he loves me and i believe him bu thtne he pulls something like this. He wants me to be honest but i can't be because when i am he uses it against me and i HATE it. Hes a great boyfriend and i ( Read more... )

i'm so fucking stressed right now. I mean theres track,woon to be work,schoo,friends,ben,and family. I hate haveing so much but its wat i do. I've been feeling down again lately actually today i felt like overdosing on these pills that my mom gave me but i doubt they would do anything lol. i wish ben was around more for when i need him like now. In ( Read more... )

I WANT TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i d k y but i feel so much pain, anger, discomfort in me.I dont feel the same anymore and i want it to go away. I should be in a crazy place i know but i'm not i'm seen as fine and deep down i'm not but shhhh no one can know. i thought about cutting myself again but i didn't start again because of one person and thats ( Read more... )

ello well i sorta feel better i still want him here but theres nothing i can do about that. Next weekend hes coming home and we're gonna have our date just so we can have alone time no kids or family members lol. I hate it that ben can't come home every weekend it sucks but i've gotten use to it somewhat at least. umm track starts tomorrow and i ( Read more... )

well its been about 5 years since maxwell died and i'm still not over it and its been getting to me lately. i miss him soooooo much. He was the only cousin close to my age who i talked to. I know if he was here i'd be able to have at least someone i could talk to. No matter how much we faught we liked eachother i think......... Actually everything ( Read more... )

wow okay well ben was on vacation and it went okay until that time of the month came then i got all emotional and sappy. It sucked cuz thats not me. I cried at everything when ben let go of me i cried. i cried just laying there i was all weird. Friday we went bowling that was fun. we didn't get any time for just us which i hated A LOT I really ( Read more... )