bah. sometimes i hate myself. i hate myself for many reasons. reasons i suppose i cant say. i want everyone out of my life. i want everything to start over ( Read more... )

im so fuckin tired of all you little depressed suckers feeling sorry for yourselves. what is it exactly that make your life just that horribly gawd awful? did you ever stop to think everyone has it just as bad as you in some way shape or form and is doing just fine? i think you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and suck it up and deal cuz i ( Read more... )

so here i am. i can definitely say its been a while. so a lot has happened since i last wrote. shawn broke up with me. that would definitely be the highlight. bah what can i say, life sucks right? so anyway. sunday was casualties. that was soooooooo fucking awesome. even getting shot down by the hot guy with the green mohawk. :( but oh well. kayley ( Read more... )

i feel so cut off from everyone. :( i feel like im ;losing all my friends and all the happiness i had last year. i mostly feel like i have lost kayley. yes kayley YOU! i never see her at school and she has a TON of new friends. therefore me=0. liz is also gone...and i yet again feel so god damn insignificant. school without liz is like no school at ( Read more... )

tomorrow school starts. and well i think i just might cry. at least i have some classes with friends. none with shawn which really sucks. so summer is coming to an end and ever so quickly. this just may have been one of the best summers too. claires end of summer party was pretty fun.it was definitely a good end to it. today i went shopping and it ( Read more... )

last night i made yet another stupid mistake. why do i always do that? i have problems with commitment. I have been hurt worse than some could imagine. and took it out on shawn and really screwed things up. But then i had time to think and really sorted things out. I cant be mad at someone forever just because i didnt get what i want. I feel ( Read more... )

i feel unusually tall today. its kinda creepy.

blah, i dont even know whats going on anymore. today it was sunny out but it seems so dark. hmm thats how i feel. i wanna know why. why do i get so depressed out of nowhere for no good reason? why do i push people away but pull some in? gah! i hate myself sometimes. and theres nothing i can do about it. right now, if you ask me, i hate you too. but ( Read more... )