Just to let you know what's going on, since I don't post in this one nearly as much as I post on xanga. Jamie and I ended up sleeping in the same bed upstairs. Well he slept and I stared at him a lot. I slept for about 30 min, then his mom called, he jumped outta bed, and I woke up. We fooled around for awhile, but we didn't have sex. I kinda ( Read more... )

Ok, so I went upstairs earlier, cause Jamie was up there and I really wanted to see him. He still kept giving me those looks. I'm not really sure what they mean. I'm so confused and frustrated right now. I don't know if he likes me or not and I'm not really sure what to do about it. I mean I know he told me the other day that he liked me and that ( Read more... )

Ok, so it's like 51 degrees outside! Not cool! I am not by any means a cold weather girl! I was born in California. It doesn't get too cold there. Anyway. Now that I'm done bitching about that. I got woke up a bunch of times this morning which made me kinda grumpy, but it's all good now. I got to see Jamie at like 6:30 this morning. That made me ( Read more... )

Whatever the reason may be I cannot stop thinking about Jamie. We are two very different people, but we get along so well. I really liked it when we were kissing the other day. I really want to kiss him again. And his hair. I love it. It's blonde and curly! I just want to play with it. I know that sounds kinda weird, but whatever. Its all good man ( Read more... )

My eyes burn

From these tears

You think you've learned over these years

Good things won't last forever

So what the hell am I supposed to do

You only wanted the things I couldn't give to you

And you had it all anyway

So take take everything

And leave me scrambling

Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take ( Read more... )

Ok, so I've been hanging out with Mike and all his friends for like the past 3 or 4 days. Um, all of his friends have either hit on me, or tried to hook up with me. I find this kind of amusing. I got really fucked up with Mike's friend Jamie the other night. Well we were the only two up cause everyone else had passed out so we went back to Jamie's ( Read more... )

How could you expect me to change everything about myself. To ask someone to changes things about themselves yet not make any changes your self is appaling. You can't expect change without making change. No one is perfect. not you not me not anyone! It must be nice to have everything handed to you your entire life. If you lived one day in my shoes ( Read more... )

Why can I not have a little peace in my life. I've accepted the fact that James is a selfish asshole and that he wants to fuck everyone over. I've decided that its time to move on with my life. I've accepted the fact that I pretty much have no place to live, and no way to get to my job, but that's all ok. I have myself and that's all I need. I ( Read more... )

I hate the way you make me feel

You make me feel unimportant

And that the things I say hold no value

You make me feel like shit

If I cut myself

Would you see me bleed

Would you even notice the cut marks?

Do you see the pain I hide deep inside

Pain from you

And the things you do

I cannot escape from this pain

It grows worse and worse

With each ( Read more... )

Ok, so James moved out on Friday. The night before he went out to the bar and I guess he started shit w. Fatty. He came home and acted like everything was ok. Well sort of. He was being his usual self. Fatty, Miles and Ann got back to the apartment w. the cops! They made him leave. It was awesome. Fatty and Miles changed the locks that night too. ( Read more... )