i feel like i'm stuck in a world that never lets me just be..have what i want once in a while and be happy.  i have to work so hard for absolutely everything...even a love that i know i have and i know has me.  she's single now, and i still cant be with her.  i understand that it's too soon and that she doesn't want a relationship anytime in the ( Read more... )

'goodnight my future girl'
'goodnight my everything'
mmmm, i love this one. she's it for me. i don't want anyone else. she'll realize it soon...that it's me.  that it's only me.

she makes me so happy...and i know she feels that way too...i want to be with her so badly...but i'm willing to wait for her. she's worth the wait completely. ohhh...and kissing her---it's like i was meant to find her...she fits perfectly. i love every second i'm with her.

...i'm all over the place. i've let both steph and allyson go enough so that i can be okay with being their friends.  steph and i talk once in a while, but she's busy at school. and i totally get that. us talking over break really helped a lot because i was able to see her reasoning behind not talking to me. and it wasn't because she hated me, it ( Read more... )

so i'm back at school and enjoying myself...for all of break i've been saying that i want to find someone at school. like i wanted to find friends who were in the same situation as me..bi or gay or whatever...and not just friends..i'd LOVE to find a girl here. wellll first night of school, we're having a few people over in my room to hang out and ( Read more... )

well..i'm alone again. i have both of them as friends, but i'm alone. what else is new?

well my happy new year wasn't quite happy. it was until i realized i'd been fooled, yet again. allyson is back together with her ex boyfriend. and i'm left alone. what was all that bullshit about not leaving me? guess it's my own fault for thinking things had changed.

"And then I felt sad because I realized that once people are broken in certain ways ( Read more... )

i don't know exactly what's going on in my head.  i trust her so much but i can't help hating how much she's with the guys that want her beyond belief.  she hangs out with them all the time and i'm almost afraid to wonder if anything happened.  there's no doubt in my mind that they would try something..i just have to keep believing that she means ( Read more... )

please stop trying to be my friend. if you'd really wanted this, you would've called or attempted this a month ago.  why is it that you try now? maybe because you're home and away from your "perfect" girlfriend? oh..right..that's usually how it goes with you. have a great christmas and a happy new year. here's to not getting to know the new you.  ( Read more... )