I'm in a really bad/weird mood.  I wish I understood it, but of course I don't.  Ugh.  I just want to give up, I'm not even totally sure why, but I do.  Everything just seems so pointless, it takes so much energy and I don't understand anything.  I feel so lost and alone.  Nothing I am doing seems to help and it is so frustrating.  I feel like such ( Read more... )

I really love my dad, but sometimes even his best attempts fail and it makes me want to ask him to just not try.  He knows that exercise is supposed to be good and make you feel better and things like that, so he suggested that we go on a bike ride.  I didn't mind too much since I didn't really have anything else better to do.  But it was rather ( Read more... )

Sorry that I didn't get to write any more last night, but my mom was mad at me for writing an email and wanted me off, so I didn't get to.  Young Women was really quite annoying.  People really frustrate me at times.  If you don't understand something or if you disagree with something that doesn't give you the right to make fun of it!!!  UGH!!  So ( Read more... )

I really should be doing homework, but I just don't feel like it.  I don't know what my problem is, I don't mean about not wanting to do homework and stuff, but just in general.  I'm just a weird kind of mess I guess.  I have like no attention span what so ever and I feel like I have a lot of energy and I can't sit still, yet I don't want to do ( Read more... )

I am in a really bad mood right now and I'm not totally sure why.  I just really want to totally freak out and scream and cry and not have to deal with anything anymore.  I am so tired of running and pretending things are okay and ignoring that there is a something wrong, but I just kind of do it subconsciously.  I go through the day seeming ( Read more... )

It is finally over!!  Wow, I am so relieved.  It is not spectacular or anything, but it is done and I don't have to worry about it any more and that is such a relief, so much off my back.  Yay :)!  I really love priesthood blessings by the way.  I was totally nervous and freaking out and totally just wanted to give up yesterday and then I got a ( Read more... )

I can't believe I have to do my audition tape for the BYU Music Department TOMORROW!!! AAAHHHHHH!!! I am so not ready at all, I don't know my French piece nearly well enough and my Italian piece isn't all that impressive, my English is okay, but one good piece isn't going to get me in. So yeah, I am totally freaking out. I have been running from it ( Read more... )

Oh my gosh, I love David so much, he is so wonderful. I have been having a rough day all day and then I got a letter from him and it really helped. He is so amazing. He has gone through so much in the last couple of months from eating gross food to dealing with 120 degree weather with no air conditioning and so very much more, yet he is still ( Read more... )

Yeah, I'm supposed to be cleaning my room which looks like a disaster area, but I don't feel like it; I don't feel like doing much right now. Just want to escape.... Anyway, I have like no attention span at all right now. I didn't last night either, I'm sure that has nothing to do with the fact that I was up until 3:30 doing random stuff on the ( Read more... )

I can't believe I'm back "home" I miss MI so much. UGH!!! Why does life have to be so complicated, I guess I just like to complain. I'm such whiner. Anyway... I better get heading toward bed.... 'night.