i can't sleep at night.
only sleep i get is at inappropriate times of the day.
this has to stop.

I have scars of so many men on my body, some will stay for the rest of my life.
a constant reminder that happiness can turn to painfulness in just a few short years.

not to say the painfulness can't turn to happiness, cause i got those too.

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60 times.
60 times I have heard this song in the last 3 days.
60 times I have laughed when it came on.

what is happening.
why is this just occurring to me?

i feel a lot better knowing that my christmas plans are pretty much worked out.
i cant want to get home to my family.

get out of my fucking head 2004, that goes for you 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008 AND most of you 2009.

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD.

200 photos of you, with old friends, and a new lover ( Read more... )

its weeks like this one that i really wish i was home with my mom and dad.
i dont care how old i get,i think i will always want my mom and dad when i fall ill.
i cant seem to kick this virus.

2 more days till my partial family is home, i hope everything is better then.

i want a hug from my father.
i want to laugh with my sisters.
i want to see Cedric.
i want to be a real person again.
i want to embrace the company of others.
i want to no longer push away people who try to care.
i want to see the sunrise.
i want.
i want.
i want.

I can't wait until I can get back to Phoenix.
I miss it so god damn much.
Not to say I am unhappy here, cause that is not the case.
I am having the time of my life and meeting a lot of new, amazing, and interesting(to say the least) people.
I just want to remember the ones I've met before.

Ryan went back to Pheonix ( Read more... )