Comments | infanttyrone: To Dote, Has Doted, Is Doting

infanttyrone

To Dote, Has Doted, Is Doting

Oct 03, 2007 16:35

On the whole, I have been pretty content to be single. I'm not big on socializing, don't care for sharing my bed while sleeping, and I'm happy cooking for one. Sure, I miss sex, and once in a great while I'll feel a little lonely, but on the whole I think the pros outweigh the cons. I'm not very good at being a boyfriend, and thus I'm saving ( Read more... )

Comments 24

fuzzilla October 3 2007, 22:16:01 UTC

I remember recently I mentioned to you "OMG, somebody up there likes me, I found parking right on my street on the night of the drunken lout fest in Lincoln Square..." I seriously thought it would take me an hour, and was anticipating all kinds of parking-related stress and headaches ( ... )

infanttyrone October 3 2007, 22:32:13 UTC

I was just talking to a guy at the bar about women getting their guys into fights. "Are you going to let him say that to me?" I have never been into the kind of woman who expects that kind of thing, but unfortunately I have been struck by occasional fits of machismo "pertecktin mah wooman"-type stuff. It's stupid, it's sexist, it's dangerous, but when it bubbles up it comes from some deep dank pit of reptilian hormones.
I used to go to White Sox games with a good friend who would pick sports-related arguments with groups of big beefy guys and turn to me and say "Am I right? Tell 'em." And me, who knows squat about sports would have to shrug and smile weakly...

wanderingaengus October 3 2007, 23:04:50 UTC

I read an article a while back about the murder of a Chicago call girl, and the article said that what the highest-paid prostitutes offer is the "GFE" -- "girlfriend experience." In other words, just what you're talking about. I'm tempted to agree with you that that's even creepier than simply paying for sex, but I also feel like I shouldn't be judgmental about people meeting each others needs if they're respectful to one another. Far from ideal, maybe, but not the worst thing in the world.

Sorry about the bike crash. Can I ask how it happened? I can't figure out why I've had so few. (Touch wood.) It seems like I must be just lucky -- since I don't seem to myself to be especially careful out on my bike.

infanttyrone October 3 2007, 23:11:31 UTC

Oh, I'm not even comfortable in strip clubs. There is no way I'd actually avail myself of a service like that, but I suspected that there must be something like it. And I'm not judging anyone, I just find the phenomenon creepy, even while understanding the motivation.

The accident was a technical malfunction. The crank arm broke off, just below the pedal. It happened as I was standing on that pedal, going through an intersection, so all my weight on my left side suddenly went crashing to the street, spinning me down and horizontal. My arm and heinie caught most of the force. I'm not so hurt as embarassed and sore-- but we'll see how I feel tomorrow. Good thing I've already got a cane.

wanderingaengus October 3 2007, 23:29:38 UTC

Didn't you have a similar accident before?

I've never had anything like that happen (I have had my brakes fail, but only one of the two at a time.) Maybe it's just that my bikes always get stolen before they've lasted long enough for major mechanical failure.

infanttyrone October 3 2007, 23:37:35 UTC

Yes, that was the other crank arm. Today the remaining original one broke. It was the kind of accident where your going real fast and then the next thought you register is "I should stand up and get out of traffic." I didn't even know what had happened until I saw the stupid pedal lying there as I pulled myself to the curb. I was good, though. I didn't hurl it into the sky in rage.
This bike is a 1957 Phillips that's been gone over and had almost everything but the frame itself replaced, so each time a part breaks I can replace it with an updated item.

santaprudencia October 3 2007, 23:11:11 UTC

Dude, I need someone like that too, even though I'm married and all. Just the nurturing and company, that's irreplaceable, and when someone's busy they got no time for that kinda stuff.

It seems Chicago's much more treacherous for bikes than the bay area. I've had friends who've been smacked up on theirs but it's a rarer thing. So many people here ride them that if you drive a car, you learn to navigate around them fast.

infanttyrone October 3 2007, 23:17:04 UTC

I was just saying that this accident wasn't car-on-bike, but a technical foul. (Busted crank arm.)
I think this is a fairly harsh cycling environment, even though it's all pretty flat. The weather corrodes metal and rubber, and the streets are pitted and treacherous. And not all the drivers are disgruntled homicidal assholes, but enough of them are...

Yeah, even as I was thinking those thoughts and writing the post, I was remembering times when my ex was ill or hurt and I didn't care for her as much as I could have. Although to be fair she is also one of those people who will not lay down and rest if she's hurt or sick, even when had busted ribs or horrible stomach flus she would insist on limping and wobbling around.
So I guess you're right-- even having a significant other wouldn't make this any better. Single it is!

semibold October 4 2007, 00:54:12 UTC

about 85% of the time I'm content being single too. I'm such a miserable person when I'm dating, I have no sense of security and I'm just paranoid it's going to end at any moment. I feel much healthier in my own brain when I don't even bother. Yes, the absence of sex kinda sucks, and I don't even have a "friend with benefits" situation, but such is life. I don't think I could handle that very well either.

But when I show up at a party as the only uncoupled person, or get invited to some function where a date is expected, or, like you said, when something happens and you have to decide "Who do I call?" there's a big empty hole where someone is supposed to be. And once in awhile I'd like to fall back on my traditional gender role and have a boy climb the ladder to change the light bulbs in the ceiling, or carry the heavy bags upstairs.

Is there a "Boyfriend Experience" prostitute service I can call? Eh, I don't have enough money for that anyway.

infanttyrone October 4 2007, 01:21:12 UTC

Ha ha I bet you could find a realistic "boyfriend experience" service. He would come over, sit on the couch and drink beer and in re: the ladder & lightbulb "yeah, yeah, I'll get to it. The game is almost over."

I wish there was a way to meet someone and have the giddy excited first couple months of glee and novelty, and then skip directly to the three year mark, where your comfortable with each other, and know each other's bad spots and have decided it's worth it.

bibliofile October 4 2007, 06:32:41 UTC

"yeah, yeah, I'll get to it. The game is almost over."
Sounds like you're ready to go on your next part-time gig. Though of course you'll soon branch out and have franchises everywhere, and walk dogs just because you like to, not for the money.

he giddy excited first couple months of glee and novelty, and then skip directly to the three year mark,
Oh yeah, no kidding!

infanttyrone October 5 2007, 00:13:46 UTC

That's already why I walk dogs.
But I think one of the reasons I got an F in relationships was my inability to maintain early-months excitement. I prefer the comfortable part, but she wanted more of the thrilling stuff.

dusty_chenille October 4 2007, 02:58:30 UTC

Man, I'd be a good chicken soup and sweatpants prostitute. I am much better at that than, I guess, well, the other things ladies offer by the hour (sex? Avon demonstrations? ???)...

Ow, with the bike wrecks. :( I have a friend in NYC who used to be a bike courier... he's broken many bones. Damn cars. :(

infanttyrone October 4 2007, 05:56:42 UTC

"Hey there big boy, you looking for a little nurturing? Oh yeah, I cuddle you long time."

I might have mentioned it before, but I am absolutely terrified of cycling in the city amongst the cars. But its a fear that I can meet head-on, so I do it every day. I think it makes me a safer biker.