hello there :)

I've changed almost every aspect of my life.
and now I feel so lost.
I should be happy.
I hope you are doing ok.

I haven't updated like I wanted, in fact I haven't really done half as much as I wanted to this year already. I'm dragging my feet in hopes that reality isn't real. That I'm going to wake up and Kristy will be there reassuring me it was all a bad dream. This is ridiculous, I have had enough relationships especially bad ones to know this expectation ( Read more... )

What can I say other than it's been a rough year ( Read more... )

*deep breathe* Day 1 it's fuckin 12:22pm and I'm still not out of bed. Last night was the 4th consecutive New Years Eve I've spent alone in bed. I'd say this depression has gotten to me. I tried medication, it helped the most probably but it's been shit a little under a year since I've been off it. Gone thru some heavy shit that's just life but now ( Read more... )

2010 resolution #2 Update, and keep a dedicated journal of my journey out of this personal hell.

I write this, not knowing where I am, or where I'm going. I write this, not knowing who I am, or who this is to...the only thing I know for certian is that after all this time I still write. Mental side notes of rhyming grocery lists to explicit raps about my girlfriends sex, I still write about it all. So I guess when all is lost this is the one ( Read more... )

hello el-jay, hows it goin ( Read more... )

The rescue group calls her snowball but that's not really gonna fly with me ( Read more... )

I just wanted to say how thankful I am for her. Self hate is the worst poison, but love is the magic that reminds you to breathe.