i almost lost... almost walked away from a life i've fought so hard to build. a life without the masks encompassing me as a whole. without the facade of perfection encamping me. my life used to be all about what others wanted. i lived for a purpose i wasn't really sure about. i almost walked away from living. almost finished a letter of doom ( Read more... )

living...breathing... disappointment, surprises, lust, yearning, hurt, pain, aches, butterflies, tears, blood, spit, kissing, hugs, falling, getting up, scratches, yelling, hitting, screaming, gasping, cutting, heart, kindness, gentleness, forgiveness, mercy, friends, stabbing...in the back, words, vibrations, color, feeling, texture, smoothness, ( Read more... )

arg... i had another one of those dreams and i don't know why they keep happening ( Read more... )

Romans 2:1-3, "if you judge someone else, you have no excuse for it. when you judge another person, you are judging yourself. you do the same things you blame others for doing. we know that when God judges those who do evil things, he judges fairly. though you are only a human being, you judge others. but you yourself do the same things. so ( Read more... )

i had another episode again. why do i do this every time of this month? scared... frightened... yet all it took was to hear them upstairs, then laughing... giggling with you, running down the stairs, flopping onto the couch, into your arms, and everything was okay. my eyes were still stained red from the sobbing i had done earlier. you looked ( Read more... )

i don't want to feel melodramatic. maybe that's why i never talk about my "problems." i feel so disconnected from everything lately. i don't want to feel. i don't want to think. i don't want to be bothered by these thoughts. thoughts which make no sense, have no substance except disturbance. i hate being alone because then i'm faced to face ( Read more... )

i'm happy... happiest i've been in a long time. although why do we still feel like something will always be missing? we're never fully content and that's sad. why are we like this? or maybe it's just me?.... whateva ( Read more... )

easing into a closet. a closet so tight there is no room for insight. things happen for a reason so it seems. since when did reason become so obscene? trying to correlate exchanges leading to this. but in this closet there's no room to miss.... miss talking about life, talking about Him. this and that never became so familiar ( Read more... )

i hate it when people try to post anonymously when everyone KNOWS who they are by their stupid ass comments. air force? right... and medical school? are you still talking like you are apart of it? you're still hung up on that? *smiles* you're continuously stealing her words. you know she HATES you with a passion so don't bother calling her at ( Read more... )

listen as the wind blows across the great divine. voices trapped in yearning. memories trapped in time. the night is my companion and solitude my guide. will i spend forever here and not be satisfied? and i will be the one to hold you down. kiss you so hard. i'll take your breath away. and after i wipe away your tears. just close your eyes ( Read more... )