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I am in love and, true to form, it is the most inconvenient and incapacitating thing. -
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I diagnose everyone's issues. I am everyone's therapist. I am always told how wise I am.
Then I make all the same fuck ups I recognize in everybody else. What does that make me? -
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I am in lockdown mode.
Get out of my head, get out of my bed. Get out of my head, get out of my bed. Get out of my head, get out of my bed. -
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On Sunday, I happened to attend the same Memorial Day party as my ex-boyfriend. He was wearing the same pants as that morning last year when he called me to tell me he'd pissed himself in his sleep on his friend's couch and needed a ride home. I kept thinking of that all night; there he is again, good old Pisspants ( Read more... ) -
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it's really something to see your actions in black and white, isn't it? i haven't felt out of control, but maybe i've just gotten used to the wind in my hair. i suppose you can't fathom how fast you've been going until you're finally at rest ( Read more... ) -
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my divorce is final. i got the certificate in the mail on friday. it looks like a certificate you get for achieving something in high school, like those athletic awards. presidential? congressional? either way, there was a "happy holidays" sticker on the envelope. happy holidays.
there is nothing this world won't do in the name of comedy.
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i moved into a new apartment. the divorce is not final yet, but underway. i'm going to be a divorcee. i'm going to have an ex-husband.
i feel like i should be on dynasty. i feel like i should wear a silk robe, but call it a dressing gown. i feel like i should be hurling vases and glasses of champagne at the mirror above the fireplace.
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i am getting a divorce -
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is it wrong to lie to your therapist?