This hurts so much...my heart has never hurt more then it does now...

The things that I'm feeling I really can't describe at all. I stayed up all night thinking, which is amazing because my medication usually knocks me on my ass. It's so sunny outside and it makes me feel that soon things will be looking up, things always seem a little bit better when it's warmer out. I've been so stronge these past few weeks, ( Read more... )

The past couple days haven't been bad at all! Now that I'm on heavy drugs (legal ones) I crash at night so I no longer have a problem with sleeping ( Read more... )

I just got to talk to Fettweis which was fun as usual! We both talked a lot about what has been going on and how we feel and everything is as good as gravy! Which puts my mind at ease. I also received a song from her, air guitar and everything! I would have to say it's been the high light of my day so far! But it would take a lot to top it ( Read more... )

So this is for all my friends who thought that I had dropped off the face of the earth. I didn't, I'm still here ( Read more... )

So I could lie and say things are good and that I'm doing well, but what's the point? I have been doing a good job pretending, most people that I'm around think I'm doing extremely well. But really I am dieing, slowly, but it's happening. I am a very emotional person, I tend to cry a lot. Over movies, my thoughts, but normally once a week. I ( Read more... )

I might as well be dead. Instead of letting me go back to the hospital where I am safe they gave me drugs. So I'm really doped up. They only make me feel more down and not able to function, all I want is to burn myself, make all the pain go away. My friend's momdied yesterday morning! I was really pretty close with her. I'm so out of it ( Read more... )

I got so many comments on my last post! I should post pictures more often! It was really nice to have that many comments because I've been feeling mighty lonely. About two hours ago I got out of the hospital. I was put in the psych ward Friday night. It's been crappy, they did nothing for me at all! I had lots of amazing people come visit. ( Read more... )

These are some pictures from Christmas, my aunt sent them!


( Read more... )

Things are slowly coming around. Here's my update on everything ( Read more... )