The topic is "Birthday Gifts"

[ironpoet]

Yesterday was the Chairman's birthday. He received some excellent gifts, including a gift certificate for iTunes from "[?]". Thanks, [?], whoever you are! For those of you who are still interested in gift-giving, you might consider charitable donations. (For example, these sitesIn the meantime, the Chairman would like to hear about your best

Comments

[vanguardcdk]

Very Happy (belated) Birthday!!

[ironpoet]

That is a terrible poem, and has nothing to do with birthday gifts! (But thank you...)

[yankee_in_texas]

"Happy Birthday" said the tag,
"Here's a helpful little book."
Not that she would ever nag,
Or criticize the way I look.
No, this list of calories
From every food one might ingest
Was meant to aid, to help, to please
Her daughter, whom she loves the best.
I sold my birthday gift that day
And took the paltry sum I got,
Plus ten more cents, to town to pay
For a Malt-O-Meal donut.

NOT IRON POET ABS OF MALT-O-MEAL

[The Quality Bakery of Northfield, MN does not have a web page. But they make an awesome Malt-O-Meal donut.]

[yankee_in_texas]

Grayish heaps still lay
At the feet of the pines
Snow in May, for me

NOT IRON POET REMEMBERING A MASSACHUSETTS SPRING IN THE 70S

[yankee_in_texas]

My firstborn child, a girl, is from my womb
Untimely ripped. A perfect child, and I,
Left lying paralyzed, too glad to cry
For chances lost, hear scalpels sing birth's doom.
Three days to heal enough to leave the room,
Six weeks until I stand without a sigh,
A year to learn that untold risks to my
Fertility shroud future births in gloom.
Yet pregnant once again, I wear them down,
I sign their papers, beat them one by one.
A gift: A second chance, so rare, so fine,
I work, I fight, I move my baby down,
I rest, I puke, I push, I have a son!
My child is born. The gift of birth is mine.

NOT IRON POET C-SECTIONS-SHOULD-BE-FOR-TRUE-NEED-ONLY

The winner is...

[ironpoet]

Sorry for the late judging, but the Chairman has been feeling seriously under the weather for the past week.

I'm giving the win to NOT IRON POET ABS OF MALT-O-MEAL, because it transforms a terrible birthday gift into a wonderful birthday gift, and I think that's awesome.