The thing that sucked about the message tonight was that it hit home, but I'm one of those people that doesn't want to change. I am in that rebelious stage and I don't feel like coming out of it. I really really don't want to. I want to have a relationship with Him, but at the same time, I don't want to stop doing the stuff I know I should stop doing. I feel like a horrible person but no matter how much I try to make myself want to change, I just can't. I don't want to change, and I don't know what to do to make myself want to. This sucks.
Yeah... that's how I feel. I know that what I want is not something that is His plan. Not something that He wants. I don't feel like it is anyway. I know that I have to choose one or the other and I want my way. I mean it could work out if I went my way. I could do both at the same time, but I feel deep down that it wouldn't work. One or the other.
what is ur life controlled by? aww bailey if u need to talk u have lots of friends who are here for u. really there are, u may not realize it, cuz i know i didnt, but ur friends care and want to help u out buddy!
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