Right from the start you play the story out bit by bit, your pacing is perfect. And when she gets her revenge it is by utterly devastating him, even before his parents...I'd say that was enough! Brava! Very well written!
Great story! What I find intriguing is that you've told essentially the same story I did: the woman scorned by a man, who, in the end, gets revenge. Mine is told as a nineteenth century western, yours as a fantasy. Eternal truths!
"Tell the people what they want to hear This was terrific foreshadowing of how he would come to treat the narrator over time... before he didn't even bother with that.
The boxing in of who people are and can be, taking more and more of them away from themselves, is such a horrid thing. I always worry the victim won't notice in time, and will eventually be destroyed by it.
This story of revenge was utterly satisfying in bringing about the comeuppance that was long overdue.
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This was terrific foreshadowing of how he would come to treat the narrator over time... before he didn't even bother with that.
The boxing in of who people are and can be, taking more and more of them away from themselves, is such a horrid thing. I always worry the victim won't notice in time, and will eventually be destroyed by it.
This story of revenge was utterly satisfying in bringing about the comeuppance that was long overdue.
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