Moving Through Grief

[jacqui]

I’ve been wanting to write, missing it, but every time I think about sitting down to begin I get bogged down in narrative and the exhaustion that accompanies me through this grief. All of these thoughts and the heavy sadness that sits on my chest like a sharp rock waiting for me to take a deep enough breath, or accidentally stumble across the

Comments

[jacqui]

Thank you sweety, you are such a good and supportive friend. I so appreciate your kindness.

Big Warm Hugs,
Jac

[kyburg]

It's not small. Not for you. It's as big as the life was - the hole that's been left behind. Take it at your own pace - I'm sure everything will be okay.

Oh - did I give you that bit of personal magic?

No matter what. You're going to be okay. I'm sure of it. There it is - your own personal magic. When things are scary, remember it.

It hasn't been that long, has it? 90 days? 45 more after that?

Jeez, the first 90, all you can reliably do is breathe. 45 after that, you just kind of pick your head up to look around and think about the next thing.

Anything more than that is gravy. Seriously.

And I am so sorry.

[jacqui]

Thank you Honey, for this, it helped me so much when I first read it. I felt validated and understood. You are so kind, an angel, really.

Love You,
Jac

[sweet_pickles]

Grief is a very personal journey. It sounds like overall you are hanging in there, and that is what matters. Try to forgive the comments/questions that don't feel right. It is different for everyone, and as a society we are taught to move on and not think about death. As you have said, anyone willing to talk about it is a blessing.

[jacqui]

Hi Sweetheart, Thank you so much for your kindness, for even thinking to read and comment on my thoughts. I didn't have any problem with the comments here. I'm so grateful for anyone who would bother to hang around and write anything, considering how inoften I post and how totally unable I am to return the favor of commenting. I understand that it is super hard and uncomfortable for people to reach out to offer comfort to others who are grieving, and I have often said some of these same things to people myself. We just don't have enough of an understanding or a language for grieving or death in our culture. So, yeah, I totally agree with you, and I am always grateful to you for you.

Love You,
Jac

[zoochica]

All I can really do is this:

*hug*

...but it is genuine.

[jacqui]

Awwww Sweetie, I appreciated this when I first read it and I am appreciating it again now. I am giving you a genuine loving hug back. Thank you so so much for hanging in here with me. You're the best!

Big Hugs,
Jacqui

[goodcheft]

Very intense but deeply real post.
Thank you for sharing this.

[jacqui]

Thank you for taking the time to read it and comment. I am super grateful to you for your generosity in doing this, especially since I have been so absent. Yeah, my life had been pretty intense for about as long as I can remember so it would make sense that my infrequent entries would be. If you think this is intense, you should see what I'm storing up to write about next, sheesh.

Thank you Honey, thank you sincerely for giving me the gift of your precious time.

Big Warm Hugs,
Jacqui