01: The Last Terrible Entry I'll Ever Write or; Will Dance For Tolerance.

[jamesmcvoy]

The Drum was most beautiful beneath a blanket of snow. Nan was the kind of woman who softened during winter. A bear approaching hibernation. Carols started at first frost, and while we listened to Bing sing his dreams of a White Christmas, my sister and I splashed about in puddles of shit-gray slush, hoping for an illness to excuse us from school

Comments

[evanrachelwood]

I've often wondered about the motives of people who get caught up in it. And it's difficult not to get caught up in, to take a step back and keep perspective. I think there's times we're all sucked in, whether we'd like to admit to it or not. When you're in the thick of it, you slip under a little. If you know what's good for you, you pull yourself up and out before it's too late. When I was in Germany a few months ago with a friend, there were photographers jumping on the hood of our car and people shouting things at us. I've never experienced anything like that before. It wasn't fantastic or surreal - it was the scariest thing that's ever happened to me.

Just another day to feel like I'm in the wrong place, I guess. I get that a lot. Welcome around.

[jamesmcvoy]

I experienced a bit of that working so close to Angie and Keira and I don't think I'd be able to endure it. I don't want to seem as if I'm turning up my nose at anything, but I'm not the kind of guy to tolerate being stalked. I'd rather swallow lobster claws. Having experienced what you did in Germany, do you feel as if your ideals about what you do have changed any? I hope to never sink into the abyss. If I do, I'll know it's time to find something else to do with my life

Haha I almost quoted Hanson and choked on my tea. Thanks, you.

[murphycill]

I only make it to half the events I am invited to and it’s never because I want to. I’m not interested in playing that part or putting myself under the spotlight, I’m sure there is something very gratifying about it and I am not judging anyone who attends but it’s just not for me. Cameras make me uncomfortable and I want to keep the attention on my work and the characters I take up. Those are for the world to judge and enjoy, but my own life is an entirely different matter.

[jamesmcvoy]

I try to go to them all, because I've got an awful complex about coming across as an ungrateful wanker. That fucking spotlight is riddled with all kinds of obsidian poisons that'll suck the will to create out of you before it's been properly fostered. I'm with you, Murphy, I don't think it's fit for anyone. You watch people get sucked so far in that their entire existence becomes a performance and you can't see where the lie ends or where they begin. Personally, I enjoy being boring enough to appreciate being someone else for a few weeks.

[jamesmcvoy]

I agree with possessing the ability to produce a transcendent performance being a gift, but it's also completely frightening when you think of where it comes from. Be it darkness or blinding light.

Hahah thanks, man. On all accounts. I've a Herbert-centric hidden in an undisclosed location but you didn't hear that from me.

[russellkl]

I think in most walks of life there's some kind of tendency towards "the grass is always greener on the other side" type feelings. I don't know if it's really so much wanting something that someone else has or being unhappy with one's own situation so much as there is a modicum of sacrifice in pretty much whatever we choose. It's hard not to wonder about how the other half lives.

[jamesmcvoy]

It probably says a lot of negative shite about me that my immediate reaction to this was an immediate recoil. I suppose it depends on how you were raised - as everything these days seems to depend upon that. Wondering is one thing, shaping your life around a lie is something completely different. Most people don't know it's all goof, which is sad. As far as sacrifice goes, it's true. But no one ever seems to appreciate that.

[russellkl]

No, no one ever does seem to appreciate that. I hope I didn't offend you because that wasn't my intention at all. I can see where you're coming from with shaping your life around it, as opposed to wondering. It is sad, but there's just no real way to know it differently without living it.

[jamesmcvoy]

No, no. I wasn't offended in the slightest, I enjoy hearing various perspectives. And you're absolutely right. I suppose the appeal of That Life is simply beyond my comprehension, though I do have a sick curiosity to talk to someone who's actively sought the attention they've recieved. Fairly hypocritical, don't you think?

[j_rhysmeyers]

I don't know if you really can have horrible 80's music. I mean, it all seemed a bit of a laugh, you know? I don't know. Was U2 the only band who were really serious about music? Well, I take that back. One of the worst songs I've ever heard was fucking Money For Nothing and that's cos they played it all the time when I was a kid. I hated it then and I hate it now.

[jamesmcvoy]

My favourite part of 80's music is the electronic bass-lines. You really can't go wrong with a fucking keytar, man. Even if it does sound like a litany of harmonised farts. How can you hate an overkill of Money For Nothing! Blasphemy, Meyers. Blasphemy, I say! Next you'll be telling me you've a hatred for Don't You (Forget About Me). You seem like a man who knows his way about a hi-fi. How do you feel about Josef K?